It is generally believed that some people are born with certain talents, for instance for sports or music, and others are not. However, it is sometimes claimed that any child can be taught to become a good sports person or musician. Discuss both these views and give your own opinion.
Sample Response
Each child in this world comes with a great potential and different children have different talents for various activities. One child may have fantastic talents for sports and someone may have more potential to become a mathematician, musician or an artist. It’s a quite interesting natural phenomenon that we face within the children. To make the world more beautiful and enriched, we should nurture the different thoughts and different innate abilities of children. In my opinion nature and nurture both have the equal role to play for a child to become a successful professional.
To begin with, every child reflects his/her abilities at the infant stage and parents can decide their life path. Those children come with natural talents and outshine others. For instance, a child shows more promising performance among the siblings in mathematics even though all of them have got same care and environment. This proves that people have inborn talents that we cannot deny. No doubt proper care and effective teaching method can hone someone's performance but this is not always the case. If training and teaching would have been everything we would certainly recreate great minds like Newton, Einstein, Mozart and Shakespeare every year.
From a neutral point of view, it depends on the brain capacity and also with the parent’s care. If the parents are wiser and more talented, we can see their children become more talented. Sometimes it gives a broader outlook of a child's life. They easily absorb the things what they learn from the school as well as from the society. Genetic engineering also confirms that talented parents usually give birth of talented children. However, this does not guarantee that a child of talented a successful parents will always be talented and successful. For this, an outstanding amount of effort and dedication would be required both from the parents and the child.
On the contrary, most of the children do not have outstanding inborn talents. They might have some potentials but that cannot be explored until they are engaged in a certain field. Without practice and commitment, many talented individuals do not even explore their potential in their entire life. Thus practice, excellent teaching method and dedication can bring out the best of a child and guide him for the rest of the life. Consequently, children become more talented and experts only if they are engaged in a certain field. For an instance, well-known football player Ronaldo had has his own talents, but he has improved this skill only by proper guidelines and practice.
To conclude, talent makes many people stand out of the crowd and helps to perform extraordinary things. However proper care, environment and dedication are also required to create professionals with expertise and kill.
IELTS Writing Correction
- 1. Article order Original: It’s a quite interesting natural phenomenon Suggested revision: It is quite an interesting natural phenomenon Why it matters: Quite should come before the article in this structure.
- 2. Article error Original: nature and nurture both have the equal role Suggested revision: nature and nurture both have an equal role Why it matters: Use an equal role rather than the equal role.
- 3. Natural verb Original: reflects his/her abilities Suggested revision: shows his or her abilities Why it matters: Shows is clearer and more natural here.
- 4. Pronoun reference Original: parents can decide their life path Suggested revision: parents can help decide the child's life path Why it matters: Their could refer to parents or children, so the reference needs clarity.
- 5. Missing article Original: all of them have got same care Suggested revision: all of them have received the same care Why it matters: Use the same care and a more formal verb.
- 6. Conditional form Original: If training and teaching would have been everything Suggested revision: If training and teaching were everything Why it matters: Use were in this hypothetical conditional.
- 7. Unclear signpost Original: From a neutral point of view Suggested revision: From another point of view Why it matters: Neutral does not accurately signal the paragraph function.
- 8. Parallel preposition Original: depends on the brain capacity and also with the parent’s care Suggested revision: depends on brain capacity and parents' care Why it matters: Depend on should govern both noun phrases.
- 9. Wrong preposition Original: give birth of talented children Suggested revision: give birth to talented children Why it matters: The fixed phrase is give birth to.
- 10. Word order Original: a child of talented a successful parents Suggested revision: a child of talented and successful parents Why it matters: The adjectives need to be joined correctly.
- 11. Uncountable noun Original: some potentials Suggested revision: some potential Why it matters: Potential is normally uncountable in this meaning.
- 12. Verb error Original: Ronaldo had has his own talents Suggested revision: Ronaldo had his own talent Why it matters: Had has is ungrammatical.
Suggested Rewrites
- It’s a quite interesting natural phenomenon It is quite an interesting natural phenomenon
- nature and nurture both have the equal role nature and nurture both have an equal role
- reflects his/her abilities shows his or her abilities
- parents can decide their life path parents can help decide the child's life path
- all of them have got same care all of them have received the same care
- If training and teaching would have been everything If training and teaching were everything
IELTS Writing Criteria Scores
Detailed feedback by IELTS writing criterion after the annotated essay.
Task Response
The essay discusses both views and gives a clear opinion that nature and nurture both matter. It includes relevant examples and development, although some points about genetics and parents are asserted too broadly and the final word choice weakens the conclusion.
Keep the balanced position, but make examples more precise and avoid unsupported claims such as talented parents usually produce talented children.
Coherence and Cohesion
The essay is well paragraphed and generally progresses from natural talent to training. Some repetition of talented and child, plus a slightly unclear neutral paragraph, reduces cohesion.
Use clearer topic sentences and avoid repeating the same claim about talent and parents across adjacent paragraphs.
Lexical Resource
There is enough range for the topic, including nurture, innate abilities, hone, commitment, and dedication. Lexical accuracy is uneven, with errors such as give birth of, potentials, and expertise and kill.
Use accurate collocations: give birth to, potential, develop expertise, natural ability, deliberate practice, and professional skill.
Grammatical Range and Accuracy
A range of complex sentence forms is attempted, but grammar errors appear regularly in articles, conditionals, prepositions, and noun forms. Most errors do not prevent understanding.
Check conditional structures and prepositions after depend, give birth, engage in, and improve.