One of your friends has asked you to be a partner in his/her new business. Write a letter to reply to your friend's offer. In your letter: - give your opinion of your friend's business idea - tell him/her whether or not you have decided to accept the - offer and explain your reasons for this decision
Sample Response
Dear Joseph, Hope you are doing excellent. I am sorry that I couldn’t write back to you early enough to let you know about my opinion on becoming a business partner of yours. I know that you are really excited about your new business idea of supplying all kinds of raw meats in the stores of different cities, but after giving a lot of consideration to this new business idea of yours, I think that it is going to be a little riskier than what you would actually like to believe. Then, every business is more or less risky. Since raw meat is a perishable item, and as such, you need to be extra cautious about delivering these raw meats to the stores on time. I am already running my gift shop and I don't have enough money to invest in another business right now. So I don’t think that I can be your business partner at this time. But, I certainly thank you for your kind offer. Wishing you all the best. Warm wishes, Freddie
IELTS Writing Correction
- 1. Use adverbial expression Original: excellent Suggested revision: well Why it matters: Doing well is the natural expression for asking about someone's general state.
- 2. Use natural timing phrase Original: write back to you early enough Suggested revision: write back to you sooner Why it matters: Sooner expresses the delayed reply more directly and naturally.
- 3. Clarify the decision Original: my opinion on becoming a business partner of yours Suggested revision: my decision about becoming your business partner Why it matters: The letter ultimately communicates a decision on the partnership offer rather than only an opinion.
- 4. Use uncountable meat Original: all kinds of raw meats Suggested revision: various kinds of raw meat Why it matters: Meat is normally uncountable when referring generally to products for sale.
- 5. Fix supply preposition Original: in the stores of different cities Suggested revision: to stores in different cities Why it matters: Goods are supplied to stores, and in different cities naturally describes their locations.
- 6. Remove extra relative Original: riskier than what Suggested revision: riskier than Why it matters: The comparative construction takes the following clause directly without what.
- 7. Use concessive transition Original: Then, every business Suggested revision: That said, every business Why it matters: The sentence qualifies the previous concern rather than describing the next event in time.
- 8. Remove doubled connector Original: Since raw meat is a perishable item, and as such, Suggested revision: Since raw meat is perishable, Why it matters: Since already introduces the reason, so and as such is redundant and ungrammatical here.
- 9. Use natural appreciation Original: But, I certainly thank you Suggested revision: However, I sincerely appreciate Why it matters: This phrasing expresses gratitude for the offer more naturally while maintaining the friendly tone.
- 10. Make apology concise Original: I am sorry that I couldn’t Suggested revision: I'm sorry I couldn't Why it matters: The contraction and omission of that suit a natural letter to a friend.
- 11. Use concise verb Original: giving a lot of consideration to Suggested revision: carefully considering Why it matters: The concise verb phrase avoids an unnecessarily heavy nominal construction.
- 12. Avoid repeated phrase Original: this new business idea of yours Suggested revision: your proposal Why it matters: The business idea is already established, so a shorter reference improves flow.
Suggested Rewrites
- excellent well
- write back to you early enough write back to you sooner
- my opinion on becoming a business partner of yours my decision about becoming your business partner
- all kinds of raw meats various kinds of raw meat
- in the stores of different cities to stores in different cities
- riskier than what riskier than
Why this response received Band 7.0
The response gives a clear, tactful refusal, evaluates the perishable-meat business with relevant delivery risks, and explains the financial reason for declining, so the communicative purpose is fully achieved. Its main limitation is occasional awkward wording and dense single-paragraph organisation; prioritise dividing the opinion, decision, and reasons into clear paragraphs and refining phrases such as “doing well,” “raw meat,” and “however, every business carries risk.”
IELTS Writing Criteria Scores
Task Achievement
The letter directly evaluates the business idea, clearly declines the partnership, and supports that decision with relevant practical and financial reasons in a suitable tone.
Add a brief constructive suggestion, such as testing deliveries in one city first, to make the response even more helpful to the friend.
Coherence and Cohesion
The response progresses sensibly from the delayed reply through the evaluation and reasons to the refusal, but all content appears in one paragraph and “Then” is a weak transition.
Create separate paragraphs for the business assessment and the personal decision, using “However” to introduce the balancing point about risk.
Lexical Resource
Vocabulary is varied and precise enough to discuss investment, perishability, delivery, and risk, with a few awkward choices such as “raw meats” and “doing excellent.”
Use natural collocations such as “raw meat,” “doing well,” “supply stores,” and “invest in the venture.”
Grammatical Range and Accuracy
Complex sentences are generally well controlled and meaning is consistently clear, despite occasional word-form, punctuation, and linking errors.
Revise the greeting to “I hope you are doing well” and avoid combining “Since” with the redundant linker “as such” in the same sentence.
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IELTS General Training Writing Task 1
One of your friends has asked you to be a partner in his/her new business. Write a letter to reply to your friend's offer. In your letter:
- give your opinion of your friend's business idea
- tell him/her whether or not you have decided to accept the
- offer and explain your reasons for this decision
Your response
Write the task yourself, then compare your choices with the annotated response.