You have just spent a weekend at a friend’s house. When you returned home, you discovered that you had left a coat containing some belongings there. Write a letter to your friend. In your letter: - tell your friend that you left the coat - describe the coat, where you think you left it and what was inside it - suggest how to get it back

Same question Compare 2 different answers (Band 7.5)

Sample Response

Dear Steven, Thanks very much for a great weekend and I really enjoyed my time at your house. Please say hello to Paula whose hospitality is unforgettable. I hope you both will be able to come and stay with me sometime soon. Regrettably, I left my new coat at your house, I probably left it on the hooks in the guest room. Do you remember the black coat that I wore when I arrived at your house? It is a black tic classic fit car coat that goes down to mid-thigh level. It has a zippered inner bib, a quilted lining, three large buttons and side pockets on both sides. It's made of wool and nylon and I am sure you will detect it as soon as you look at it. I have left my wallet in the left pocket of the coat and the wallet contains my credit cards and some cash. I also put my Samsung Galaxy tab and an important document in the right pocket of it and this is really important for me. Laura will be in your town on Friday and I am hoping you would be able to give her a call so that she can collect it from your house. I have given her your phone number and she will be contacting you soon. Thanks again for a magnificent weekend and I hope to see you soon. Warm wishes, Haksoon Paik

IELTS Writing Correction

  • 1. Add relative-clause comma Original: Paula whose Suggested revision: Paula, whose Why it matters: The non-defining relative clause about Paula needs a preceding comma.
  • 2. Use a natural tone Original: Regrettably Suggested revision: Unfortunately Why it matters: This wording sounds more natural in an informal letter to a friend.
  • 3. Fix comma splice Original: house, I probably Suggested revision: house. I probably Why it matters: Two independent clauses cannot be joined by a comma alone.
  • 4. Place both naturally Original: I hope you both will be able Suggested revision: I hope you will both be able Why it matters: Placing “both” after the modal gives the clause more natural word order.
  • 5. Remove redundant wording Original: side pockets on both sides Suggested revision: side pockets Why it matters: The phrase “side pockets” already conveys their position on the coat.
  • 6. Use the right verb Original: detect Suggested revision: find Why it matters: “Find” is the natural verb for locating a coat in this context.
  • 7. Use a concise possessive Original: the right pocket of it Suggested revision: its right pocket Why it matters: The possessive form avoids the awkward phrase “of it.”
  • 8. Align tense and modality Original: I am hoping you would be able Suggested revision: I hope you will be able Why it matters: The revised form clearly expresses a present request about a future action.
  • 9. Use simple future Original: she will be contacting you Suggested revision: she will contact you Why it matters: The simple future is clearer and more concise for this planned contact.
  • 10. Separate the letter sections Suggested revision: Use separate paragraphs for the greeting, the coat description, the return arrangement, and the closing. Why it matters: Clear paragraphing would make the sequence of information easier for the friend to follow.

Suggested Rewrites

  • Paula whose Paula, whose
  • Regrettably Unfortunately
  • house, I probably house. I probably
  • I hope you both will be able I hope you will both be able
  • side pockets on both sides side pockets
  • detect find
Overall assessment

Why this response received Band 7.5

The letter communicates its purpose immediately, covers every requested point with specific identifying details, and maintains a warm, suitable tone. Its main limitation is presentation: placing the entire message in one paragraph weakens the otherwise clear progression, while a few awkward word choices and sentence joins reduce polish; dividing the content into purposeful paragraphs and tightening those local expressions should be the priority.

Band score breakdown

IELTS Writing Criteria Scores

TA

Task Achievement

8.0
Scoring rule

The purpose is clear, all three bullet points are fully covered, and the friendly register is consistently appropriate.

Next step

Make the request slightly more direct by explicitly asking Steven to contact Laura and hand the coat to her.

CC

Coherence and Cohesion

7.0
Scoring rule

The information follows a logical sequence, but the absence of paragraph breaks makes the long letter less easy to navigate.

Next step

Use separate paragraphs for the greeting and context, the coat and belongings, and the collection arrangement.

LR

Lexical Resource

7.5
Scoring rule

Vocabulary is varied and often precise, especially in the detailed description of the coat and its contents.

Next step

Replace less natural choices such as 'detect it' with idiomatic wording such as 'spot it' or 'find it'.

GRA

Grammatical Range and Accuracy

7.5
Scoring rule

A good range of sentence forms is used with strong overall control, despite a few awkward constructions and comma joins.

Next step

Separate independent clauses cleanly and keep modal choices consistent, for example by revising 'I am hoping you would be able'.

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IELTS General Training Writing Task 1

You have just spent a weekend at a friend’s house. When you returned home, you discovered that you had left a coat containing some belongings there. Write a letter to your friend. In your letter:

- tell your friend that you left the coat

- describe the coat, where you think you left it and what was inside it

- suggest how to get it back

Your response

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