Some employers believe that job applicants’ social skills are more important than their academic qualifications. Do you agree or disagree with this opinion?
Sample Response
In today's competitive job market, there is a growing belief among some employers that the social skills of job applicants are more crucial than their academic qualifications. I strongly agree with this opinion, as social skills are essential for building positive relationships and enhancing the overall productivity of an organisation.
Academic qualifications may make a candidate eligible for a particular job but do not guarantee success in a job. For example, a candidate who has excellent academic qualifications but lacks social skills may face difficulties in working with colleagues and clients, leading to negative consequences for the organisation. This will lead to dissatisfaction by employer and even job temination.
Moreover, employees who possess excellent social skills can contribute significantly to the success of an organisation. They can build better relationships with colleagues, clients, and stakeholders, leading to improved collaboration, increased trust, and better outcomes. For instance, an employee with excellent communication skills can effectively communicate with clients, address their concerns, and ensure customer satisfaction, leading to repeat business for the company.
Finally, employees with better social skills are often more adaptable, empathetic, and emotionally intelligent, which are crucial for working in a team environment. They can handle conflicts better, motivate their team members, and create a positive work environment, leading to increased productivity and higher job satisfaction.
In conclusion, while academic qualifications are necessary for job seekers, social skills are even more important. Employers should prioritise social skills while assessing job candidates to ensure the overall success of their organisation.
IELTS Writing Correction
- 1. Make opening direct Original: there is a growing belief among some employers that Suggested revision: some employers increasingly believe that Why it matters: The direct clause conveys the same trend more concisely.
- 2. Use possessive form Original: the social skills of job applicants Suggested revision: job applicants' social skills Why it matters: The possessive form expresses the relationship more economically.
- 3. Tighten collocation Original: enhancing the overall productivity Suggested revision: improving overall productivity Why it matters: This phrasing is more concise and natural in this context.
- 4. Avoid repetition Original: success in a job Suggested revision: success in the role Why it matters: 'The role' avoids repeating 'job' while preserving the reference.
- 5. Reduce word repetition Original: employee with excellent communication skills can effectively communicate Suggested revision: employee with excellent communication skills can interact effectively Why it matters: The revision avoids repeating 'communication' and 'communicate' in the same clause.
- 6. Clarify result clause Original: leading to improved collaboration, increased trust, and better outcomes Suggested revision: which can improve collaboration, increase trust, and produce better outcomes Why it matters: A finite relative clause makes the cause-and-effect relationship explicit.
- 7. Vary result link Original: leading to repeat business for the company Suggested revision: thereby encouraging repeat business for the company Why it matters: 'Thereby' links the result clearly and avoids another identical participial ending.
- 8. Use formal phrasing Original: handle conflicts better Suggested revision: manage conflicts more effectively Why it matters: This expression is more precise and appropriately formal.
- 9. Tighten result phrase Original: leading to increased productivity and higher job satisfaction Suggested revision: thereby increasing productivity and job satisfaction Why it matters: The revision expresses the result concisely and varies the repeated linking structure.
- 10. Clarify time relation Original: while Suggested revision: when Why it matters: 'When' more directly identifies the stage at which employers should apply this priority.
- 11. Sentence rewrite Original: This will lead to dissatisfaction by employer and even job temination. Suggested revision: This can lead to employer dissatisfaction and even job termination. Why it matters: The rewrite corrects the noun phrase, missing article issue, spelling error, and overly certain modal.
Suggested Rewrites
- there is a growing belief among some employers that some employers increasingly believe that
- the social skills of job applicants job applicants' social skills
- enhancing the overall productivity improving overall productivity
- success in a job success in the role
- employee with excellent communication skills can effectively communicate employee with excellent communication skills can interact effectively
- leading to improved collaboration, increased trust, and better outcomes which can improve collaboration, increase trust, and produce better outcomes
Why this response received Band 8.0
The response maintains a clear position and develops it through logically sequenced reasons and relevant workplace examples, with particularly strong control of organisation and complex sentence structures. Its main limitation is some repetition and a few imprecise or incorrect expressions that slightly reduce lexical polish. The highest-priority improvement is to vary recurring language about social skills and outcomes while proofreading carefully for collocation and spelling errors.
IELTS Writing Criteria Scores
Task Response
The position is explicit and consistently supported by well-developed reasons and relevant examples covering relationships, clients, teamwork, and productivity.
Add a little more critical comparison with the value of qualifications to make the argument even more nuanced.
Coherence and Cohesion
Ideas are logically sequenced in focused paragraphs, and cohesive links guide the reader smoothly through the argument.
Reduce repeated result constructions such as leading to so that connections between ideas feel less formulaic.
Lexical Resource
A broad and generally precise vocabulary supports the discussion, although a few collocational slips, repetition, and a spelling error remain.
Proofread for natural combinations such as employer dissatisfaction and vary repeated terms for workplace outcomes.
Grammatical Range and Accuracy
The essay uses a wide range of complex structures with strong overall control and only occasional non-impeding errors.
Refine article use and agreement in isolated phrases to make the grammatical control more consistently polished.
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IELTS Writing Task 2
Some employers believe that job applicants’ social skills are more important than their academic qualifications. Do you agree or disagree with this opinion?
Your response
Write the task yourself, then compare your choices with the annotated response.