You have recently gone to live in a new city. You want to let an English-speaking friend who lives in another country know about it. Write a letter to your English-speaking friend. In your letter: - explain why you have gone to live in the new city - describe the place - where you are living - invite your friend to come and see you
Sample Response
Dear Siera, Hope all is well at your end. I haven’t heard from you in a while, and I think that it's time for some exciting updates from my end. In fact, I've moved to a new city which is way better than my previous place. The new city is not as big as the previous one, but it's not as crowded as my old city either. Besides, it's a clean city, and it has lots of greeneries around. But, the best thing about the new city is that I actually get to live in a small and inexpensive apartment, which is very close to a beautiful lake. Anyway, the main reason, for which, I have moved to a new city is that I got bored of living in the old city. Besides, the living expenses of the old city were skyrocketing every month as with every other big city. Another reason, for which, I moved to a new city is because it is actually closer to where my parents currently live. I'm sure you would like my new place, so come and visit me sometime! Warm wishes, Hamid
IELTS Writing Correction
- 1. Add the subject Original: Hope all is well Suggested revision: I hope all is well Why it matters: A complete sentence needs the subject I, even in an informal letter.
- 2. Use natural greeting Original: at your end Suggested revision: with you Why it matters: All is well with you is the more natural personal expression.
- 3. Avoid repeated idiom Original: updates from my end Suggested revision: news from me Why it matters: This sounds more natural and avoids repeating from my end.
- 4. Make comparison precise Original: way better than Suggested revision: much better suited to me than Why it matters: This preserves the friendly tone while explaining that the comparison is personal.
- 5. Name comparison clearly Original: previous place Suggested revision: previous city Why it matters: City is the exact category being compared.
- 6. Use uncountable noun Original: lots of greeneries Suggested revision: lots of greenery Why it matters: Greenery is uncountable when referring collectively to plants and vegetation.
- 7. Remove conjunction comma Original: But, Suggested revision: But Why it matters: A comma should not follow the coordinating conjunction at the start of this sentence.
- 8. State residence directly Original: actually get to live Suggested revision: now live Why it matters: The concise phrase directly describes the current living arrangement.
- 9. Remove faulty interruption Original: main reason, for which, Suggested revision: main reason Why it matters: The relative phrase and commas unnecessarily break the sentence structure.
- 10. Use natural reason phrase Original: got bored of living Suggested revision: grew tired of living Why it matters: This is a smoother way to describe the change in feeling over time.
- 11. Use location preposition Original: living expenses of Suggested revision: living expenses in Why it matters: Expenses occur in a city rather than belonging to it.
- 12. Avoid exaggerated trend Original: were skyrocketing every month Suggested revision: were rising every month Why it matters: Rising reports the repeated increase clearly without unnecessary exaggeration.
Suggested Rewrites
- Hope all is well I hope all is well
- at your end with you
- updates from my end news from me
- way better than much better suited to me than
- previous place previous city
- lots of greeneries lots of greenery
Why this response received Band 7.0
The letter covers every required point with relevant detail and uses a warm, suitably informal voice, especially when describing the quieter city and lakeside apartment. Clear communication is weakened by the single-block presentation, repetitive connectors, and recurring awkward phrasing or punctuation around relative clauses. Organise the update into short functional paragraphs and revise expressions such as ‘lots of greeneries’ and ‘another reason, for which’ for naturalness.
IELTS Writing Criteria Scores
Detailed feedback by IELTS writing criterion after the annotated essay.
Task Achievement
The reasons for moving, the city, the apartment, and the invitation are all covered clearly with specific detail and an appropriate friendly tone.
Make the invitation even more purposeful by suggesting a possible time or activity for the visit.
Coherence and Cohesion
The information moves logically from the personal update to description, reasons, and invitation, but one-block paragraphing and repeated connectors reduce control.
Divide the letter into short paragraphs for the update, new surroundings, reasons for moving, and invitation.
Lexical Resource
The letter uses a sufficient range of informal and descriptive vocabulary, but choices such as ‘greeneries’, ‘from my end’, and ‘living expenses were skyrocketing every month’ are awkward or imprecise.
Choose simpler idiomatic combinations, such as ‘plenty of greenery’ and ‘the cost of living kept rising’.
Grammatical Range and Accuracy
Simple and complex forms are mixed successfully enough for clear communication, although intrusive commas and redundant relative-clause patterns recur.
Remove commas around ‘for which’ and avoid constructions such as ‘the reason is because’.
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