Some practical skills such as money management should be taught in high school. Do you agree or disagree? Give your opinion and real life examples.
Sample Response
High schoolSchool is a crucial timeis the high time when teenagers takeput their first step towards independence. If they can be taught practical skillseducated with practical skills, it will help them enormously in facing real world challenges. Practical skills like money management can help them manage their lives betterassist them in better management of their life. Some people may argue that practical skills are best learnt in real life rather than the classroom.
Teenagers receive a fixed allowanceget fixed allowance from their parents and some do part-time jobs to cover their expensesfund their expenditures. Although they do not possess large sums of money, they can easily be cheatedany thug can cheat them easily. For instance, many teenagers take loans to fund activities such asfulfil their illegal activities like drinking, drugs and smoking. They end up owing huge sums to loan sharks, without recognising the problems aheadwithout sensing the troubles ahead. If they learn practical skills like money management, they can wisely take control of their liveslife and stay out of troubletroubles.
Some people believe practical skills cannot be taught in classrooms. As the name suggests, they are best learnedit can be best learnt by dealing with life. For example, if money management and risk management are taught in class, there is no guarantee that a pupilthere is no guarantee that pupil will succeed in lifecan get success in life. He can be too risk averse and avoid excellent tools of money making like Share trading, betting and even government bonds. If we look at successful people like Ambanis, they did not learn practical skills in the classroom, but in real life. Highly educated Charted Accounts, engineers and clerks work under their leadership.
In conclusion, teaching practical skills can alert and educate teenagers to combat the real life nuisances. However, a few things can be best learnt by experience and most successful people gained expertise by experimenting.
Why this response received Band 6.0
The essay considers both classroom teaching and experiential learning, and its examples show an effort to connect money management with real-life decisions. Its main limitation is an insufficiently explicit overall position, compounded by questionable examples such as betting and loan-funded illegal activity and by frequent imprecise phrasing. Prioritise stating a clear degree of agreement, then support it with credible examples of budgeting, saving, credit, and debt.
IELTS Writing Criteria Scores
Task Response
The response discusses relevant benefits and limitations of classroom instruction, but its degree of agreement remains implicit and several examples provide weak or questionable support.
State a clear qualified position in the introduction and use realistic examples showing how school lessons improve budgeting or borrowing decisions.
Coherence and Cohesion
The four-paragraph structure gives the essay clear overall progression, although the counterargument dominates and some pronoun references are imprecise.
Balance the two body paragraphs and use explicit nouns instead of shifting between 'skills', 'it', 'pupil', and 'he'.
Lexical Resource
The essay has adequate range for finance and education, but collocations such as 'put their first step', 'get success', and 'tools of money making' are inaccurate.
Prefer natural expressions such as 'take their first step', 'succeed in life', and 'ways to build wealth'.
Grammatical Range and Accuracy
A mix of simple and complex forms communicates the main ideas, but article, agreement, number, and reference errors occur frequently.
Check plural noun phrases and pronoun agreement, using forms such as 'a fixed allowance', 'pupils can succeed', and 'skills are best learned'.
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IELTS Writing Task 2
Some practical skills such as money management should be taught in high school. Do you agree or disagree? Give your opinion and real life examples.
Your response
Write the task yourself, then compare your choices with the annotated response.