Some people think that it is better to educate boys and girls in separate schools. Others, however, believe that boys and girls benefit more from attending mixed schools. Discuss both these views and give your own opinion.
Sample Response
WhetherThe topic of whether boys and girls should be taught in mixed schools has been a contentious issue since the beginning ofever since the initiation of women’s rights movements. Some argue that teaching boys and girls in the same schoolsthe practice of teaching boys and girls in the same school should continueshould be upheld, while others oppose this viewrefute this. Both sides of this debate will be analysed in this essay before a reasoned conclusion is drawn.
In one camp, it is believed that educating boys and girls in a co-educationaleducation system offers numerous benefitsreaps numerous bounties. For example, most women’swomen rights activists contend that educating boys and girls togetherinstructing males and females together improves understanding betweenenhances the understanding between the two genders. This equips members of both genders with the necessary skills which can later be transferred into their personal lives, and as result enjoy a higher degree of matrimonial bliss. Thus, it is clear why many people support the idea of co-education.
On the other hand, many consider educating girls and boys separately to be bestmany consider the practice of educating girls and boys separately is best. For example, Saudi Arabia is often mocked for its conservative culture. Despite this, Saudi Arabia has one of the lowest rape and sexual assault rates in the world. One cited reason for thisOne of the reasons cited for this is the segregation on the basis of gender in the educational institutionsinstitutes. When looking at this side of the debate, the benefits that are derived from separate schools for girls and boys can be seen.
Although both sides of this argument have indisputable virtues, it is felt that practice of educating male and female pupils in the same school is much more of a positive development than negative. Therefore, it is hoped that the trend of co-education schools will continue to be the global norm for the foreseeable futurethe norm the world over into the foreseeable future.
Why this response received Band 7.0
The response addresses both educational models, maintains a clear preference for mixed schooling, and organises the discussion into an easy-to-follow progression. Its main limitation is that each view rests on a single broad claim, with the link between school segregation and sexual-assault rates especially insufficiently substantiated. The highest-priority improvement is to develop each argument with more precise reasoning and credible, directly relevant support.
IELTS Writing Criteria Scores
Task Response
Both views are addressed and the writer's preference is clear, but the supporting arguments are somewhat generalised and unevenly substantiated.
Develop each side through a clearer causal explanation and use evidence that directly demonstrates educational benefits.
Coherence and Cohesion
The essay progresses logically through a clear introduction, two contrasting body paragraphs, and a consistent conclusion.
Use less formulaic transitions and make the internal progression of each body paragraph more explicit.
Lexical Resource
A sufficiently wide vocabulary conveys the argument clearly, although several ambitious collocations sound imprecise or unnatural.
Prioritise accurate natural combinations such as 'coeducational system' and 'greater mutual understanding' over ornate phrasing.
Grammatical Range and Accuracy
A range of complex structures is used with generally good control, despite several article, complement, and coordination errors.
Check complex sentences for complete grammatical relationships, especially after reporting verbs and around coordinated clauses.
Write this task while it is fresh
Try the same task now. It helps you remember the feedback and write better next time.
IELTS Writing Task 2
Some people think that it is better to educate boys and girls in separate schools. Others, however, believe that boys and girls benefit more from attending mixed schools. Discuss both these views and give your own opinion.
Your response
Write the task yourself, then compare your choices with the annotated response.