You recently visited a place that had a strong impact on you. Write a letter to a friend about the place. In your letter: - explain where the place was and how you got there - describe what you saw - offer to take your friend there
Sample Response
Dear Sam,
I have just returned from my holidays in France and while we were there we climbed a mountain called ‘Parleman’ in the French Alps. We were able to drive half way up the mountain but then the road stopped. So we parked, put on our walking boots and began the long uphill struggle.
Despite of the road at the beginning, it still took us a while to complete the climb but it was well worth the effort. When we got to the top of the mountain, the view was incredible. I could see right across the town and the lake to one side, and on the other side were the snow-covered peaks of Mont Blanc. It was simply breathtaking.
As you know, we often go to France on our holidays and next time we plan a trip, I’d really like to take you there. I’m sure you would love the scenery and as you enjoy exercise, you would be able to take advantage of all the mountain walks.
I hope to hear from you soon.
IELTS Writing Correction
- 1. Choose precise wording Original: struggle Suggested revision: climb Why it matters: Climb describes the physical activity more precisely than struggle here.
- 2. Choose natural verb Original: stopped Suggested revision: ended Why it matters: A road normally ends rather than stops.
- 3. Clarify the view Original: right across the town and the lake to one side Suggested revision: across the town and lake on one side Why it matters: This revision describes the direction of the view more naturally and concisely.
- 4. Improve preposition choice Original: on Suggested revision: for Why it matters: For more naturally expresses France as the destination of these holidays.
- 5. Use natural gerund Original: exercise Suggested revision: exercising Why it matters: Enjoy is naturally followed by a gerund when referring to an activity.
- 6. Use natural collocation Original: take advantage of all the mountain walks Suggested revision: enjoy all the mountain walks Why it matters: Enjoy the walks expresses the intended recreational meaning more directly.
- 7. Add friendly sign-off Original: you soon. Suggested revision: you soon. Best wishes, [Your name] Why it matters: An informal closing and name would complete this letter to a friend.
- 8. Sentence rewrite Original: Despite of the road at the beginning, it still took us a while to complete the climb but it was well worth the effort. Suggested revision: Despite driving part of the way, it still took us a while to complete the climb, but it was well worth the effort. Why it matters: The rewrite corrects the faulty despite construction and clarifies the contrast.
- 9. Develop the impact Suggested revision: Explain more directly why the panoramic view had such a strong personal impact on you. Why it matters: This would connect the vivid description more explicitly to the purpose stated in the task.
Suggested Rewrites
- struggle climb
- stopped ended
- right across the town and the lake to one side across the town and lake on one side
- on for
- exercise exercising
- take advantage of all the mountain walks enjoy all the mountain walks
Why this response received Band 8.0
The letter fully covers the location, journey, scenery, and invitation in a warm, convincing tone, and its vivid vocabulary makes the experience engaging. The main weakness is one awkward and grammatically faulty contrast at the start of the second paragraph. The highest-priority improvement is to revise that sentence so the description remains precise and the otherwise smooth progression is uninterrupted.
IELTS Writing Criteria Scores
Task Achievement
All three bullet points are fully and naturally developed, and the friendly tone is consistently suitable for writing to a friend.
Add a brief informal closing and name to make the letter conventionally complete while preserving the natural invitation.
Coherence and Cohesion
The response is clearly sequenced from the journey to the view and future invitation, with cohesive devices used naturally overall.
Clarify the opening link in the second paragraph so the contrast accurately connects the difficult climb with the rewarding view.
Lexical Resource
A wide and precise range, including ‘uphill struggle,’ ‘snow-covered peaks,’ and ‘breathtaking,’ creates a vivid and flexible description.
Replace the unclear phrase ‘Despite of the road at the beginning’ with precise wording such as ‘Despite driving part of the way.’
Grammatical Range and Accuracy
A wide range of sentence structures is handled accurately, with only an isolated error in the ‘Despite of’ construction.
Use ‘despite’ directly with a noun or gerund, or use ‘although’ with a full clause, when forming concessive sentences.
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IELTS General Training Writing Task 1
You recently visited a place that had a strong impact on you. Write a letter to a friend about the place. In your letter:
- explain where the place was and how you got there
- describe what you saw
- offer to take your friend there
Your response
Write the task yourself, then compare your choices with the annotated response.