You have just rented an unfurnished flat and a friend has told you that the Opportunity Shop in the shopping centre has cheap second-hand furniture. Write to the shop owner. In your letter: - describe what furniture you need - ask whether the shop has these items - ask what the items cost
Sample Response
Dear Sir or Madam, I have just rented an unfurnished flat after arriving in this town about a couple of weeks ago. Well, as you can understand that since I am new in this town, I don’t really know many places or shops here where I would be able to purchase some cheap or second-hand furniture. Luckily, however, one of my friends, who lives in this town, advised me that I visit "Naomi Furniture", an Opportunity Shop, to find what I have been looking for. Needless to say, I liked what my friend had suggested after seeing your collection online. Anyway, I am looking to buy a standard single bed, a couple of sofa chairs, a wardrobe, a bedside table, and a medium-size dining table along with 4 chairs. I could also use a standard office desk and a desk chair. I think that’s all the furniture I need for now. So, if you please let me know whether you have them or not, and how much they could possibly cost me, I would really appreciate it. Yours faithfully, Larry Nixon
IELTS Writing Correction
- 1. Remove vague redundancy Original: about a couple of weeks ago Suggested revision: about two weeks ago Why it matters: About and a couple of overlap, so the exact number is clearer.
- 2. Use formal tone Original: Well, Suggested revision: Delete Why it matters: This conversational filler is unnecessary in a letter to a shop owner.
- 3. Preserve intended category Original: cheap or second-hand furniture Suggested revision: affordable second-hand furniture Why it matters: The task concerns inexpensive furniture that is also second-hand, not two alternatives.
- 4. Fix advise pattern Original: advised me that I visit Suggested revision: advised me to visit Why it matters: Advise takes an object followed by a to-infinitive in this construction.
- 5. Remove empty phrase Original: Needless to say, Suggested revision: Delete Why it matters: The phrase does not add information and sounds overly conversational here.
- 6. Keep formal register Original: Anyway, Suggested revision: Delete Why it matters: This discourse marker is too casual for a business enquiry.
- 7. Use compound adjective Original: size Suggested revision: sized Why it matters: The compound adjective before the noun requires the form sized.
- 8. Sentence rewrite Original: Well, as you can understand that since I am new in this town, I don’t really know many places or shops here where I would be able to purchase some cheap or second-hand furniture. Suggested revision: As I am new to the town, I do not yet know which local shops sell affordable second-hand furniture. Why it matters: The rewrite removes the faulty combination of as, that, and since while preserving the reason for the enquiry.
- 9. Sentence rewrite Original: So, if you please let me know whether you have them or not, and how much they could possibly cost me, I would really appreciate it. Suggested revision: I would appreciate it if you could let me know whether these items are available and how much they cost. Why it matters: This version uses the correct polite request structure and clear references.
- 10. Separate letter functions Suggested revision: Divide the letter into short paragraphs for the reason for writing, the furniture list, and the availability and price request. Why it matters: The single block makes the three required communicative functions harder to scan.
Suggested Rewrites
- about a couple of weeks ago about two weeks ago
- Well, Delete
- cheap or second-hand furniture affordable second-hand furniture
- advised me that I visit advised me to visit
- Needless to say, Delete
- Anyway, Delete
Why this response received Band 7.0
The letter has a clear purpose, gives a specific and useful furniture list, and directly asks about both availability and prices. Its main limitation is register and focus: conversational markers and extended background about being new in town make the request less concise and less consistently formal. Prioritise grouping the requested items and questions into focused paragraphs, while replacing chatty phrases with polite business-letter wording.
IELTS Writing Criteria Scores
Task Achievement
All three bullet points are fully addressed with relevant detail, though the formal tone is weakened by several conversational asides.
Retain the specific furniture list but remove unnecessary background and make the availability and price request more directly formal.
Coherence and Cohesion
The message follows a sensible progression from context to requested items and questions, but the single paragraph and filler transitions weaken organisation.
Use separate paragraphs for the purpose, furniture list, and final availability-and-cost enquiry.
Lexical Resource
Vocabulary is varied and generally precise for furniture and purchasing, with only occasional awkward or overly conversational choices.
Replace expressions such as "about a couple of weeks" and "Anyway" with concise formal alternatives.
Grammatical Range and Accuracy
A good range of complex structures is mostly accurate, although a few overextended sentences and conditional forms are faulty.
Simplify the sentence beginning "Well" and use a correct polite request such as "I would appreciate it if you could let me know".
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IELTS General Training Writing Task 1
You have just rented an unfurnished flat and a friend has told you that the Opportunity Shop in the shopping centre has cheap second-hand furniture. Write to the shop owner. In your letter:
- describe what furniture you need
- ask whether the shop has these items
- ask what the items cost
Your response
Write the task yourself, then compare your choices with the annotated response.