Government investment in the arts, such as music and theatre, is a waste of money. The government must invest this money in public services instead. To what extent do you agree with this statement?

Same question Compare 3 different answers

Sample Response

The government spending on arts has long been a contentious issue. Many counter the idea of government incurring expenses to promote arts. However, I feel governments should continue to spend money on arts. This will be argued by analysing how arts can contribute to a country’s economy as well as serve as a platform to achieve one’s goals.

To begin, arts such as music and theatre are steady sources of income for a country. A case in point would be New Zealand, where the government supports new artists by lending them money to kick-start their careers, which in turn enables the state to collect taxes on the revenue earned by these artists. This stream of income would be lost if there’s no spending to foster local artists. Hence it is clear that arts are vital for a country’s economic health rather than being a liability to it.

In addition, having a decent infrastructure for creative industries would mean realisation of dreams of millions who wish to be artists. For instance, in the UK, a person could choose to adopt arts as a career path, enabling him or her to earn a fair livelihood, rather than having to reluctantly pick a profession that he or she does not feel passionate about. A state where the government doesn’t invest in arts would most likely prevent people to go after what they long for, resulting in frustration on the part of people. Therefore arts play an important part in contentedness of the individuals of a nation.

In summary, the government should continue to devote resources to arts since its significance in a country’s tax system and bringing happiness to people should not be underestimated. Henceforth, government’s funding of arts is not a waste of a country’s resources.

IELTS Writing Correction

  • 1. Fix the noun phrase Original: The government spending on arts Suggested revision: Government spending on the arts Why it matters: Government functions as an attributive noun here, and the arts normally takes the definite article.
  • 2. Use the correct verb Original: counter Suggested revision: oppose Why it matters: Oppose directly expresses disagreement with an idea, whereas counter requires a different object or structure.
  • 3. Add article and simplify Original: government incurring expenses Suggested revision: the government spending money Why it matters: The government requires an article, and spending money states the intended action naturally.
  • 4. Add the definite article Original: promote arts Suggested revision: promote the arts Why it matters: The arts takes the definite article when referring to the field generally.
  • 5. Add the definite article Original: money on arts Suggested revision: money on the arts Why it matters: The general cultural field is conventionally expressed as the arts.
  • 6. Add the definite article Original: how arts can contribute Suggested revision: how the arts can contribute Why it matters: The arts requires the definite article in this general use.
  • 7. Use precise wording Original: serve as a platform to achieve one’s goals Suggested revision: provide a means of achieving personal goals Why it matters: A means of achieving goals expresses the intended opportunity more precisely than platform.
  • 8. Add article and commas Original: arts such as music and theatre Suggested revision: the arts, such as music and theatre, Why it matters: The general noun needs the, and the examples should be enclosed by commas.
  • 9. Use a natural collocation Original: steady sources of income for a country Suggested revision: reliable sources of national income Why it matters: Reliable sources and national income are more natural academic collocations here.
  • 10. Match the hypothetical condition Original: if there’s no spending Suggested revision: if the government did not spend money Why it matters: The past form matches the hypothetical result expressed by would be lost.
  • 11. Use the intended verb Original: foster Suggested revision: support Why it matters: Governments support artists, while foster more naturally refers to developing a quality or activity.
  • 12. Add the introductory comma Original: Hence it is clear Suggested revision: Hence, it is clear Why it matters: A comma should follow the introductory conjunctive adverb.

Suggested Rewrites

  • The government spending on arts Government spending on the arts
  • counter oppose
  • government incurring expenses the government spending money
  • promote arts promote the arts
  • money on arts money on the arts
  • how arts can contribute how the arts can contribute
Overall assessment

Why this response received Band 7.5

The response is well organised and maintains a clear case for arts funding, developing relevant economic and personal-fulfilment benefits through specific examples. Its main limitation is that it does not directly weigh these benefits against the competing need for public-service expenditure, and a few awkward lexical choices reduce precision. The priority is to acknowledge the opportunity cost and explain why a balanced allocation to the arts remains justified alongside essential services.

Band score breakdown

IELTS Writing Criteria Scores

TR

Task Response

7.0
Scoring rule

The essay clearly rejects the claim that arts funding is wasteful and develops two relevant benefits, but it gives little direct consideration to the proposed alternative of spending the money on public services.

Next step

Evaluate the strongest case for prioritising essential services and then explain why continued, proportionate arts investment is still warranted.

CC

Coherence and Cohesion

8.0
Scoring rule

The response progresses clearly from its position through two distinct supporting arguments to a concise conclusion, with effective paragraphing and well-managed cohesive links.

Next step

Make the comparison with public services a visible stage in the progression, ideally through a brief concession before the final judgement.

LR

Lexical Resource

7.0
Scoring rule

Vocabulary is varied and generally precise across economic and creative-industry themes, though phrases such as "adopt arts," "contentedness," and "prevent people to go after" are unnatural.

Next step

Use more idiomatic expressions such as "pursue the arts," "well-being," and "prevent people from pursuing their ambitions" while retaining the strong topic-specific range.

GRA

Grammatical Range and Accuracy

7.5
Scoring rule

A broad range of complex sentences is used with good control, and the few errors in articles, possessives, and verb patterns do not impede communication.

Next step

Refine the remaining local errors, particularly "government spending," "prevent people from," and the possessive form in "government funding of the arts."

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IELTS Writing Task 2

Government investment in the arts, such as music and theatre, is a waste of money. The government must invest this money in public services instead. To what extent do you agree with this statement?

Your response

Words0
40:00

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