Government investment in the arts, such as music and theatre, is a waste of money. Governments must invest this money in public services instead. To what extent do you agree or disagree?
Sample Response
It is certainly understandable that the government should startgovernment should start looking at ways of improving their public services in a sustainable waypublic facilities to a sustainable development. GovernmentsGovernment have to make real improvementsmake a real innovation in keeping the stability of the society, which means that people should get good service from their government. Some people argue thatThere was a statement said that government should utilise the money for public servicesimportance, and do not use this money for other things like arts (music and theatre). Personally, I disagree with that statement. In the following paragraphs, I will give my reasons to support my opinion.
In a period of rapid developmentNowadays, to face the period of development, countries have to competeas a country they have to compete with other countries. Arts can offer a positive contribution to the development of the quality of life as a country. I believe that each country has its own strengthseach country has their ability then they can compete with the others. For example, recently there are some world competitions related to ‘singing’ such as World Choir Competition, ASIAN Idol, etc. Every country sends their best participants to follow the competition. Two years ago, an Indonesian delegation took partIndonesian delegate taking part in World Choir Competition held on 15–17 March 2013 at Belgium. They have to compete with 57 countries, and finally, they got gold medals for several categories.
In addition, I think that if a government invests some money in the arts sectorto arts sector, it will create many advantages for the country itself. For instance, Indonesia has talented people in painting field, it means that they can make a beautiful creation to sellsale. One of popular painting is ‘Monalisa’ drawing. The Painting already became everlasting painting because it was drawn by the talented person, which the painter already creates many advantages for himself and his country. Another essential thing is people have to make a good teamwork with the government to produce huge advantages related to arts creations.
In conclusion, the government should invest some money to improve arts creation because it has a big opportunity to make a country more successful.
Why this response received Band 5.5
The response maintains a clear position in favour of arts funding and follows a recognizable essay structure, with examples intended to support its case. However, it engages only briefly with the competing need for public services, and several examples are weakly connected or expressed imprecisely. The priority is to acknowledge the public-services argument directly, then develop fewer, more relevant examples in clearer, simpler sentences.
IELTS Writing Criteria Scores
Task Response
The essay gives a clear disagreement and supports arts funding, but it only partly addresses the argument for public services and some examples are weak.
Acknowledge why public services matter, then explain why limited arts funding is still valuable.
Coherence and Cohesion
The essay has a recognizable structure, but ideas jump from development to competitions to famous paintings without enough linking.
Keep one controlling idea per paragraph and link every example back to government spending.
Lexical Resource
Vocabulary shows some range but many phrases are unnatural or imprecise.
Use collocations such as fund the arts, invest in public services, cultural sector, and public benefit.
Grammatical Range and Accuracy
Agreement, article, tense, and clause errors are frequent, especially in longer sentences.
Use simpler sentence patterns and check subject-verb agreement carefully.
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IELTS Writing Task 2
Government investment in the arts, such as music and theatre, is a waste of money. Governments must invest this money in public services instead. To what extent do you agree or disagree?
Your response
Write the task yourself, then compare your choices with the annotated response.