Many city planners’ new designs include setting up schools, markets and commercial places (like offices) in different areas of the city rather than placing them in a place. Do you think it will help the city dwellers? If so, how?
Sample Response
A planned city can be a blessing for the residents while an unplanned one can be quite the opposite. Though traditional cities distinguish the residential area and include commercial and public service buildings altogether, many modern designers prefer these commercial establishments to be located in different places and I am quite convinced that the new designs would bring more benefits to the city dwellers.
To begin with, though traditional cities are initially planned to have commercial buildings located in the centre of the city, to be away from the main residential area, in a few years, the structure of the city changes and it becomes a more unplanned city than ever. Naturally, parents would prefer to send their children to a nearby school while shoppers would love to shop from around the corner. As a consequence, residential areas at a time become semi-commercial areas and traffic congestion kills people’s valuable time. In such cities, pollution increases and a few per cent of landlords get higher commercial rents while others do not.
On the contrary, if cities have saturated commercial settings, it will assure balanced residential and commercial establishments and city dwellers would be greatly benefitted from it. The house rent would be fair and the traffic condition on the roads would be far better. Furthermore, the authority would have control over the future expansion of the area and face fewer difficulties to ensure the necessary facilities for the local people.
To conclude, modern city planning that supports the location of commercial entities and public services to be built in various areas of the city rather than having those altogether offers numerous advantages to the local authorities including better traffic conditions, more reliable public facilities, fair rent and better future expansion of the city.
IELTS Writing Correction
- 1. Use the correct verb Original: distinguish the residential area Suggested revision: separate residential areas Why it matters: Cities separate areas by function rather than distinguish an area.
- 2. Clarify the grouping Original: include commercial and public service buildings altogether Suggested revision: group commercial and public-service buildings together Why it matters: The original verb and altogether do not clearly express co-location.
- 3. Name the profession precisely Original: many modern designers Suggested revision: many modern city planners Why it matters: City planners is more precise in the context of urban design.
- 4. Use active wording Original: prefer these commercial establishments to be located Suggested revision: prefer to locate these commercial establishments Why it matters: The active infinitive is more concise and direct.
- 5. Use urban terminology Original: places Suggested revision: areas Why it matters: Areas is more precise when referring to parts of a city.
- 6. Use natural phrasing Original: shop from around the corner Suggested revision: shop nearby Why it matters: People shop nearby or at a nearby shop, not from around the corner.
- 7. Express gradual change Original: residential areas at a time become Suggested revision: residential areas gradually become Why it matters: At a time does not express the gradual development intended here.
- 8. Use natural collocation Original: traffic congestion kills people’s valuable time Suggested revision: traffic congestion wastes people's valuable time Why it matters: Congestion wastes time; kills time has a different idiomatic meaning.
- 9. Use a suitable proportion Original: a few per cent of landlords Suggested revision: a small proportion of landlords Why it matters: A small proportion is more natural when no numerical percentage is supplied.
- 10. Use a formal verb Original: get Suggested revision: receive Why it matters: Receive is more precise and formal than get.
- 11. Use the comparison linker Original: On the contrary Suggested revision: By contrast Why it matters: By contrast introduces an alternative arrangement, whereas on the contrary refutes a preceding claim.
- 12. Clarify distribution Original: if cities have saturated commercial settings Suggested revision: if cities distribute commercial facilities across different areas Why it matters: Saturated commercial settings does not clearly express the proposed dispersed layout.
Suggested Rewrites
- distinguish the residential area separate residential areas
- include commercial and public service buildings altogether group commercial and public-service buildings together
- many modern designers many modern city planners
- prefer these commercial establishments to be located prefer to locate these commercial establishments
- places areas
- shop from around the corner shop nearby
Why this response received Band 7.0
The response answers both questions with a clear positive view and a logically organised explanation of benefits such as reduced congestion, fairer rents, and easier urban expansion. The main limitation is that several claims remain general and some word choices are unnatural or ambiguous; the priority is to explain the cause-and-effect links more precisely while replacing awkward expressions with standard urban-planning vocabulary.
IELTS Writing Criteria Scores
Task Response
The essay gives a clear affirmative answer and develops several relevant ways in which distributing services and businesses could help residents.
Extend the strongest benefit with a concrete illustration and clarify exactly how decentralisation produces fairer rents and better facilities.
Coherence and Cohesion
The four-paragraph structure provides clear progression from the problems of centralisation to the benefits of a distributed design.
Use more exact logical transitions, particularly where “On the contrary” introduces the proposed alternative rather than a direct contradiction.
Lexical Resource
There is sufficient range for the topic, but phrases such as “saturated commercial settings” and “residential areas at a time” are imprecise or unnatural.
Choose standard collocations such as “mixed-use neighbourhoods,” “distributed services,” and “rental costs” to express planning concepts more accurately.
Grammatical Range and Accuracy
Varied complex sentences are generally controlled and meaning remains clear, despite occasional errors in articles, agreement, and clause construction.
Review long sentences for clean clause boundaries and check article and agreement choices before finalising the response.
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IELTS Writing Task 2
Many city planners’ new designs include setting up schools, markets and commercial places (like offices) in different areas of the city rather than placing them in a place. Do you think it will help the city dwellers? If so, how?
Your response
Write the task yourself, then compare your choices with the annotated response.