It is not necessary to travel to other places to learn about other cultures of other people. We can learn just as much from books, films, and the internet. Do you agree or disagree?
Sample Response
It is irrefutable that the world has revolutionized into a global village. IT is not compulsory to travel around the world to know the ground reality about cultures. Therefore it could be learned and gathered from several norms of aspects like books, films and through the internet which websites have tremendous of knowledge. However, I endorse the statement to a large extent. I have my opinion which I would like to explicate it a length in the paragraph to come.
To begin, while traveling to in abundant places for acquiring information about culture is a totally replaced by technical types of equipment, so in visual not able to travel and get in touch with civilization through the internet. For instance, there are numerous websites, movies, and books available, which people can attain their focus on the several cultures which they are seeking for. In addition, becoming a commuter and traveling to a different location consume handsome expenses and crucial time. To add it, few minor places of cultures not easily get in touch with them due to lack of transport modes, such as recent survey conducted in Australia found that, there are plenty of cultures initiate, which most individuals are unfamiliar with them and they can easily engage with the help of books and internet, which helps to collect some interesting facts of the rituals.
Furthermore, another factor is that this is too convenient for people who are handicapped and unable to get through to several locations. In that case, they easily interact with the life of other countries and feels the emotions while watching movies and videos. For instance, some movie directors specially develop ambiance, which is suitable for, those who cannot manage their body in the right way. Thus, leading movies play a significant role in terms of the diversity of cultures. Last but not least, some cultures are near too extinct and unable to find with the presence of naked eyes, so in that terms, books are considered as a bank of knowledge with a detailed history of the particular cultures. Meanwhile, some groups of people have the potential to travel, including remote places, and get practical with the outer world, so they are able to enhance their knowledge with the several communities and develop cognitive ideas about tourism. Moreover, a few places need true reality instead of imagination, so it is possible when people get interact with them.
To put it in a nutshell, I pen down saying that not every individual is strong by their roots of background and lack of time is another factor for gaining the knowledge about each nationality of the nation. Therefore, books, movies, and the internet change the lifestyle of people who are willing to know the specific history of cultures.
IELTS Writing Correction
- 1. Fix capitalization Original: IT Suggested revision: It Why it matters: The pronoun should use normal sentence-case capitalization.
- 2. Use natural phrasing Original: ground reality about cultures Suggested revision: realities of other cultures Why it matters: The original collocation is unnatural and too vague for the intended meaning.
- 3. State agreement directly Original: I endorse the statement to a large extent Suggested revision: I largely agree with this statement Why it matters: The revised wording expresses the writer’s view more directly and naturally.
- 4. Correct the expression Original: explicate it a length Suggested revision: explain it at length Why it matters: “At length” is the correct fixed expression, and “explain” is natural here.
- 5. Match multiple paragraphs Original: in the paragraph to come Suggested revision: in the following paragraphs Why it matters: The response develops its view across more than one subsequent paragraph.
- 6. Use direct verb Original: attain their focus on Suggested revision: focus on Why it matters: “Focus on” does not take the unnecessary verb “attain.”
- 7. Fix relative structure Original: the several cultures which they are seeking for Suggested revision: the cultures they seek Why it matters: The relative clause has an unnecessary pronoun and a stranded preposition.
- 8. Choose accurate term Original: becoming a commuter Suggested revision: commuting Why it matters: “Become a commuter” does not express the activity being compared with other travel.
- 9. Fix the collocation Original: consume handsome expenses and crucial time Suggested revision: require considerable expense and time Why it matters: Travel requires time and expense; it does not consume expenses.
- 10. Correct degree meaning Original: too Suggested revision: especially Why it matters: “Too” implies an undesirable excess, which conflicts with the positive claim.
- 11. Use precise travel verb Original: get through to several locations Suggested revision: travel to various locations Why it matters: “Get through to” does not mean physically visiting places in this context.
- 12. Use natural collocation Original: interact with the life of other countries Suggested revision: experience life in other countries Why it matters: People experience a way of life rather than interact with a country’s life.
Suggested Rewrites
- IT It
- ground reality about cultures realities of other cultures
- I endorse the statement to a large extent I largely agree with this statement
- explicate it a length explain it at length
- in the paragraph to come in the following paragraphs
- attain their focus on focus on
Why this response received Band 5.5
The response presents a clear broad agreement and explores several relevant advantages of learning about cultures through media, while also acknowledging that travel can add practical experience. Its main limitation is that numerous ideas are expressed through inaccurate vocabulary and unstable sentence structures, making parts of the reasoning difficult to follow. The highest priority is to select fewer arguments and develop each in clear, controlled sentences with realistic support.
IELTS Writing Criteria Scores
Task Response
The response answers the question with a generally clear position and several relevant reasons, but development is uneven and some examples are vague or implausible.
Develop two strong reasons in depth and explain directly how each proves that indirect sources can provide knowledge comparable to travel.
Coherence and Cohesion
The response uses a recognisable introduction, body, and conclusion, but mechanical linking, overlong sentences, and unclear referencing disrupt progression.
Organise each body paragraph around one central claim and use shorter explanation-example sequences with unambiguous pronoun references.
Lexical Resource
There is a reasonably broad vocabulary for culture, travel, accessibility, and media, but frequent inappropriate collocations and word choices impair precision.
Replace memorised or forced expressions with accurate topic phrases and check that each noun and verb conveys the intended meaning.
Grammatical Range and Accuracy
Complex structures are attempted throughout, but frequent errors in clauses, articles, agreement, prepositions, and punctuation often strain readability.
Write shorter sentences with one controlled subordinate clause and proofread systematically for subject-verb agreement and complete clause structure.
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IELTS Writing Task 2
It is not necessary to travel to other places to learn about other cultures of other people. We can learn just as much from books, films, and the internet. Do you agree or disagree?
Your response
Write the task yourself, then compare your choices with the annotated response.