The quality of the health care a person receives should not depend on the size of their bank balance. The government is responsible for providing a high level of healthcare for all its citizens. To what extent do you agree or disagree?
Sample Response
Quality health care is a basic need for all citizens in a country regardless of their economic or social statuses and the government should take every effort possible to ensure superior health care facilities for all of its citizens. I quite agree with the notion that government is responsible for ensuring high-level health care service of all its citizens, no matter what their economic levels are.
First of all, every government has a responsibility to ensure some basic needs to its citizens and health care is one of the most important aspects that a government should take care. Only a corrupted and inefficient government would discriminate among its rich and poor citizens and thus would build a country where rich will enjoy all the facilities while poor people would be deprived in every step.
Second, in this modern era, most of the countries, specifically in democratic countries, have a government selection model where people decide who would rule the country. The participating parties give their agenda and the list of developments they would implement for the progress of the country. In most of the cases high-level health care facility gets special emphasise in their pre-election agenda and if the government fails to ensure this facility, it is kind of a violation of their promise to the whole nation.
It is not unlikely that the government cannot offer better healthcare facilities in public hospitals while the rich people get far better treatments and diagnosis from the private healthcare facilities. This is a scenario which is quite unexpected and should not be the case in an ideal legislative system. All the citizens in a country are equal to the law and constitution and the facilities they are expected to get from the country has no way to be different.
In conclusion, when people need to spend a lot of money to get quality health care service, then we can easily assume that the government has failed to establish a proper healthcare sector for all the people. In the same way ensuring quality health care facilities to all the citizens of a country is a responsibility no government can deny.
IELTS Writing Correction
- 1. Use the uncountable noun Original: statuses Suggested revision: status Why it matters: Status is normally uncountable when referring generally to a person’s social position.
- 2. Fix the collocation Original: take every effort possible Suggested revision: make every possible effort Why it matters: Make an effort is the correct collocation.
- 3. Use precise service language Original: superior health care facilities Suggested revision: high-quality healthcare services Why it matters: Healthcare services more accurately describes the care provided to citizens.
- 4. Add the definite article Original: that government is responsible Suggested revision: that the government is responsible Why it matters: Government needs the definite article when referring to the country’s governing institution.
- 5. Fix article and preposition Original: high-level health care service of all its citizens Suggested revision: a high standard of healthcare for all its citizens Why it matters: The revised noun phrase uses the required article and the correct recipient preposition.
- 6. Use a natural term Original: levels Suggested revision: circumstances Why it matters: Economic circumstances is the natural expression for people’s financial situations.
- 7. Fix verb complementation Original: ensure some basic needs to its citizens Suggested revision: meet its citizens’ basic needs Why it matters: Governments meet needs rather than ensure needs to people.
- 8. Add the missing preposition Original: aspects that a government should take care Suggested revision: areas that a government should take care of Why it matters: The phrasal verb take care of requires the preposition of.
- 9. Use the adjective form Original: corrupted Suggested revision: corrupt Why it matters: Corrupt describes an institution, while corrupted usually describes something that has been altered or damaged.
- 10. Use the correct preposition Original: among Suggested revision: between Why it matters: Between is appropriate when contrasting the two stated groups.
- 11. Add article and match tense Original: where rich will enjoy Suggested revision: where the rich would enjoy Why it matters: The adjective rich needs the to refer to a group, and would matches the hypothetical clause.
- 12. Correct the preposition Original: in Suggested revision: at Why it matters: At every step is the correct fixed expression.
Suggested Rewrites
- statuses status
- take every effort possible make every possible effort
- superior health care facilities high-quality healthcare services
- that government is responsible that the government is responsible
- high-level health care service of all its citizens a high standard of healthcare for all its citizens
- levels circumstances
Why this response received Band 7.0
The response maintains a clear position and develops several relevant reasons why government should ensure equitable healthcare, particularly its basic-duty and democratic-accountability arguments. Its main limitation is that some claims are asserted in absolute or moralising terms rather than supported with concrete policy reasoning, while recurring language inaccuracies reduce precision. The priority is to explain how universal provision could work in practice and support the case with a specific, realistic example.
IELTS Writing Criteria Scores
Task Response
The essay directly answers the question with a consistent position and several relevant supporting reasons, though development sometimes relies on assertion rather than specific evidence or practical explanation.
Develop one concrete mechanism, such as tax-funded universal coverage, and explain how it prevents income from determining access while maintaining healthcare quality.
Coherence and Cohesion
The response progresses logically through government duty, electoral accountability, unequal provision, and a conclusion, with clear paragraphing despite some repetition and cumbersome local links.
Give each body paragraph a sharper controlling claim and reduce repeated references to government responsibility so the argument advances rather than restates the position.
Lexical Resource
There is a sufficient range of healthcare, government, and civic vocabulary, but recurring awkward choices such as "social statuses," "special emphasise," and "equal to the law" weaken precision.
Use natural combinations such as "socioeconomic status," "special emphasis," and "equal under the law," while avoiding repetitive use of "facilities."
Grammatical Range and Accuracy
The essay uses varied sentence structures and remains clear, but recurring article, agreement, preposition, and noun-form errors show uneven grammatical control.
Proofread noun phrases and subject-verb agreement, particularly "the government," "healthcare services," and plural subjects such as "the facilities ... have."
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IELTS Writing Task 2
The quality of the health care a person receives should not depend on the size of their bank balance. The government is responsible for providing a high level of healthcare for all its citizens. To what extent do you agree or disagree?
Your response
Write the task yourself, then compare your choices with the annotated response.