- Nowadays more people are choosing to socialize online rather than face to face, is this a positive or negative development?
Sample Response
The global digital media has brought about the death of time and space. Now people tend to Converse more via social apps like WhatsApp, Facebook, or Instagram than in person. It is by all means a positive development because it saves people’s time and certainly people enhance their communication skills.
First off, today’s paradigm shift has made it necessary to Converse online as people have hectic schedules. So, getting together online saves time. To exemplify it, people work round the clock and hardly get time to meet their friends or relatives. Therefore, they communicate online, and in this way, they can stay in touch with them. Apart from it, now and then, unavoidable circumstances have made it mandatory to converse online. So, it saves their time and at the same time helps to retain their relationships.
To continue, using the internet for socializing online with their loved ones not only equips them with the latest techniques but also improves their communication skill. For example, most of the people feel incapable of conversing online because of their reserved nature. If they Converse online, they gradually overcome their shyness and communicate fluently. Eventually, it helps in making them fluent. So, it is a good way to improve soft skills.
In conclusion, a modern time has made it indispensable to make friends as well as to stay connected with loved ones through different apps. Getting together online equips them with good communication skills and also makes them aware of the current technology which provides them the amenities of video calls or conferences as well.
IELTS Writing Correction
- 1. Remove the article Original: The global digital media Suggested revision: Global digital media Why it matters: Digital media is used as a general uncountable concept here, so the definite article is unnecessary.
- 2. Clarify the metaphor Original: the death of time and space Suggested revision: the reduced importance of time and distance Why it matters: The revision expresses the intended effect of digital communication more clearly and precisely.
- 3. Use lowercase Original: Converse Suggested revision: converse Why it matters: Converse is a common verb here and should not be capitalized.
- 4. Correct the expression Original: by all means Suggested revision: overall Why it matters: By all means does not express an overall evaluation in this context.
- 5. Fix clause structure Original: certainly people enhance their communication skills Suggested revision: helps people improve their communication skills Why it matters: The replacement coordinates correctly with saves and makes the causal relationship grammatical.
- 6. Use lowercase Original: Converse Suggested revision: converse Why it matters: The common verb converse should be written in lowercase.
- 7. Use natural signposting Original: To exemplify it Suggested revision: For example Why it matters: For example introduces the illustration more naturally and directly.
- 8. Improve the collocation Original: get Suggested revision: have Why it matters: Have time is the standard collocation for describing limited availability.
- 9. Fix the connector Original: Apart from it Suggested revision: Moreover Why it matters: Apart from it is not a natural additive connector in this context.
- 10. Use consistent tense Original: have made it mandatory Suggested revision: make it necessary Why it matters: The present tense fits this general claim, while necessary avoids overstating the obligation.
- 11. Use a natural collocation Original: helps to retain their relationships Suggested revision: helps them maintain their relationships Why it matters: Maintain relationships is the natural collocation for keeping social connections active.
- 12. Remove the article Original: most of the people Suggested revision: most people Why it matters: Most takes a plural noun directly when referring to people in general.
Suggested Rewrites
- The global digital media Global digital media
- the death of time and space the reduced importance of time and distance
- Converse converse
- by all means overall
- certainly people enhance their communication skills helps people improve their communication skills
- Converse converse
Why this response received Band 6.5
The response presents a clear positive position and follows a readily understandable two-reason structure, with relevant points about convenience and confidence. Its main limitation is that the support becomes repetitive and sometimes rests on unconvincing generalisations, while several awkward collocations reduce precision. Develop each reason with a specific, credible example and revise recurring phrases so that the argument becomes more persuasive and linguistically controlled.
IELTS Writing Criteria Scores
Task Response
A clear position is maintained and two relevant benefits are explained, but development is repetitive and some supporting claims are insufficiently convincing.
Use one specific real-world example for each benefit and explain the causal link instead of restating the claim.
Coherence and Cohesion
The four-paragraph structure and overall progression are clear, although frequent basic signposts and repeated ideas make cohesion somewhat mechanical.
Reduce repeated connectors such as 'So' and create smoother links by referring directly to the preceding idea.
Lexical Resource
The response shows a reasonable range of topic vocabulary, but recurring collocational imprecision and unnecessary capitalisation limit flexibility and accuracy.
Use more natural combinations for technology and communication, and proofread repeated words such as 'converse' for correct capitalisation.
Grammatical Range and Accuracy
A mix of sentence forms communicates the argument clearly, but errors in articles, agreement, reference, and phrasing occur across the response.
Prioritise checking article use and subject-verb agreement in complex sentences before adding further structural variety.
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IELTS Writing Task 2
- Nowadays more people are choosing to socialize online rather than face to face, is this a positive or negative development?
Your response
Write the task yourself, then compare your choices with the annotated response.