Today’s food travels thousands of miles before it reaches customers. Why is this so? Is this a positive or negative development?
Sample Response
[It is a positive development]
The modern food industry has undergone significant changes, and one of the most notable is the increasing distance that food travels before it reaches customers. This happens for different reasons, and I believe that it is actually a positive trend that has brought several benefits.
One reason why food travels thousands of miles today is that global trade has become more prevalent, and food producers can now source ingredients from all over the world. For example, supermarkets in the UK now stock tropical fruits from South America and Asia all year round, which was not possible in the past. This allows people to enjoy a wider variety of foods and have access to fruits and vegetables that are not native to their region. Another reason why food travels long distances is that it enables people to eat fresh produce year-round. In the past, people could only eat seasonal fruits and vegetables, but with modern transport systems, produce can be transported across the world and arrive at its destination in a matter of days. This means that people can enjoy fresh food all year round, regardless of the season.
No doubt, global food transportation has brought economic benefits to many countries. Developing countries that produce food can now export their products to other parts of the world and earn money from it. This has helped to boost their economies and improve the standard of living for many people. Moreover, it has enhanced our choices as consumers. We now have a wide variety of choices when it comes to picking a food item. It also helps us eat a variety of food and fruits that keep us healthy.
In conclusion, while some may argue that the trend of long-distance food transportation is a negative development, I believe that it is a positive trend that has brought several benefits. It has allowed people to access a wider variety of foods, eat fresh produce year-round, and brought economic benefits to many countries.
IELTS Writing Correction
- 1. Remove planning note Original: [It is a positive development] Suggested revision: Delete Why it matters: This bracketed note reads like a planning label rather than part of the essay.
- 2. Complete the noun phrase Original: one of the most notable Suggested revision: one of the most notable changes Why it matters: The superlative construction needs a plural noun after “one of the.”
- 3. Remove unnecessary emphasis Original: actually a positive trend Suggested revision: a positive trend Why it matters: “Actually” adds conversational emphasis without sharpening the claim.
- 4. Use a direct verb Original: global trade has become more prevalent Suggested revision: global trade has expanded Why it matters: The direct verb expresses the growth of global trade more concisely.
- 5. Use a logical transition Original: No doubt, Suggested revision: In addition, Why it matters: This transition more clearly links the economic benefit to the preceding discussion.
- 6. Clarify the revenue source Original: earn money from it Suggested revision: earn export revenue Why it matters: The replacement removes the vague pronoun and states the economic outcome precisely.
- 7. Use natural collocation Original: enhanced our choices Suggested revision: expanded consumer choice Why it matters: “Expanded consumer choice” is a more natural and concise collocation.
- 8. Avoid redundant wording Original: a wide variety of choices Suggested revision: a wide range of options Why it matters: The replacement avoids repeating the same idea in “variety” and “choices.”
- 9. Use concise wording Original: picking a food item Suggested revision: choosing food Why it matters: The shorter phrase is more natural in this general consumer context.
- 10. Fix countable nouns Original: a variety of food and fruits Suggested revision: a variety of foods, including fruit Why it matters: “Foods” should be plural after “a variety of,” and fruit is already a type of food.
- 11. Sentence rewrite Original: It has allowed people to access a wider variety of foods, eat fresh produce year-round, and brought economic benefits to many countries. Suggested revision: It has allowed people to access a wider variety of foods and eat fresh produce year-round, while also bringing economic benefits to many countries. Why it matters: The rewrite restores parallel structure across the coordinated benefits.
- 12. Reduce idea repetition Suggested revision: Combine the two consecutive consumer-choice points so the paragraph progresses from export income to consumer variety without restating the same benefit. Why it matters: The final three sentences repeat the idea of greater food choice instead of advancing the paragraph.
Suggested Rewrites
- [It is a positive development] Delete
- one of the most notable one of the most notable changes
- actually a positive trend a positive trend
- global trade has become more prevalent global trade has expanded
- No doubt, In addition,
- earn money from it earn export revenue
Why this response received Band 7.5
The response’s strongest feature is its clear, consistently maintained position, supported by relevant explanations of global sourcing, year-round availability, consumer choice, and export income. Its main limitation is that several points overlap or remain fairly general, especially the repeated emphasis on variety and freshness. The highest-priority improvement is to develop fewer benefits more deeply, using sharper causal analysis and a more specific example.
IELTS Writing Criteria Scores
Detailed feedback by IELTS writing criterion after the annotated essay.
Task Response
The response answers both questions directly, maintains a clear positive position, and develops several relevant reasons and benefits.
Develop the most important benefits in greater depth and acknowledge a potential drawback before explaining why the advantages still prevail.
Coherence and Cohesion
Ideas progress logically through causes, benefits, and a conclusion, with clear paragraphing and generally effective linking.
Reduce repetition between the cause and benefit sections so each paragraph makes a more distinct contribution to the argument.
Lexical Resource
Vocabulary is varied and generally precise, with effective topic language such as global trade, seasonal produce, and standard of living.
Replace repetitive uses of food, variety, and enjoy with more precise alternatives, and refine awkward phrases such as a variety of food and fruits.
Grammatical Range and Accuracy
A wide range of complex sentence structures is used with strong control, and the few lapses do not impede meaning.
Polish parallel structures and agreement in longer sentences, particularly when listing several consequences under one auxiliary verb.
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IELTS Writing Task 2
Today’s food travels thousands of miles before it reaches customers. Why is this so? Is this a positive or negative development?
Your response
Write the task yourself, then compare your choices with the annotated response.