More and more students are choosing to study at colleges and universities in a foreign country. Do the benefits of studying abroad outweigh the drawbacks?
Sample Response
It is true that the number of students who choose to study overseas has increased rapidly in the past few years. Studying in a foreign country has its own positive and negative sides, but I personally believe that it has more benefits for the students themselves.
On the one hand, some believe that the choice of studying abroad have some disadvantages. One of the reasons is that studying overseas will cost more than studying in the home country. It is necessary for parents to spend more money on airplane tickets, accommodations, foods and clothes, besides tuition fees and uniforms. Another reason is that students might be unfamiliar and uncomfortable with the culture, environment and language of the new country. As a consequence, it might have a negative effect on their mental condition and academic performance. Adopting in a new environment often hampers the natural flow of study for many students and some students do not continue their study to earn money when they are abroad.
On the other hand, another group of people think that studying in another country brings so many positive aspects for the students themselves. Firstly, by studying in a new country, students will have a chance to learn new languages and new cultures. Secondly, students will learn about how to live independently, like cleaning their own rooms or doing the laundry by themselves. Thirdly, they could make new friends with people from other countries and get familiar with multicultural environments. Lastly, it is a fact that in certain countries, international graduate certificate gives additional values when the students search for jobs.
In conclusion, it is undeniable that the preference of studying in a foreign country has its own benefits and drawbacks. Despite all the disadvantages, I believe that it has more advantages for the students themselves, therefore young people should be encouraged to study in a new country. Although some of them might have difficulties with the fees, but many international scholarships are offered these days.
IELTS Writing Correction
- 1. Use academic comparison terms Original: positive and negative sides Suggested revision: benefits and drawbacks Why it matters: Benefits and drawbacks matches the essay question and is more precise than positive and negative sides.
- 2. Match the singular subject Original: have Suggested revision: has Why it matters: The singular subject choice requires the verb has.
- 3. Add the possessive determiner Original: the Suggested revision: their Why it matters: Their identifies whose home country is being compared with the overseas destination.
- 4. Use concise travel wording Original: airplane tickets Suggested revision: airfares Why it matters: Airfares is a concise formal term for the cost of plane travel.
- 5. Use uncountable accommodation Original: accommodations Suggested revision: accommodation Why it matters: Accommodation is normally uncountable when referring generally to housing costs.
- 6. Use uncountable food Original: foods Suggested revision: food Why it matters: Food is uncountable when referring generally to living expenses.
- 7. Clarify the addition Original: besides tuition fees Suggested revision: in addition to tuition fees Why it matters: In addition to clearly marks tuition as another expense in the list.
- 8. Use wellbeing terminology Original: mental condition Suggested revision: mental well-being Why it matters: Mental well-being is a natural term for students' psychological state.
- 9. Correct the adaptation phrase Original: Adopting in Suggested revision: Adapting to Why it matters: Adapt to means adjusting to a new environment, whereas adopt has a different meaning.
- 10. Clarify study continuity Original: natural flow of study Suggested revision: continuity of their studies Why it matters: The revision clearly describes an interruption to students' ongoing education.
- 11. Clarify the interruption Original: some students do not continue their study to earn money Suggested revision: some students interrupt their studies to earn money Why it matters: The revision makes clear that earning money causes students to pause their studies.
- 12. Use a natural benefit phrase Original: so many positive aspects for Suggested revision: many benefits to Why it matters: Studying abroad brings benefits to students rather than positive aspects for them.
Suggested Rewrites
- positive and negative sides benefits and drawbacks
- have has
- the their
- airplane tickets airfares
- accommodations accommodation
- foods food
Why this response received Band 6.5
The essay maintains a clear view that studying abroad is more beneficial and covers financial, cultural, personal, and career consequences in a logical structure. Its main limitation is that the benefits are mostly listed rather than weighed explicitly against the drawbacks, while recurring word-choice and grammar errors reduce precision. Prioritise developing one or two benefits in depth and explaining why they outweigh cost and adjustment difficulties.
IELTS Writing Criteria Scores
Task Response
The response addresses benefits and drawbacks and maintains a clear judgement, but the advantages are often listed rather than comparatively evaluated.
Explain why long-term independence or career value outweighs the temporary financial and cultural difficulties described.
Coherence and Cohesion
The essay progresses logically through a balanced four-paragraph structure, although sequencing within the benefits paragraph is somewhat mechanical.
Group related benefits into developed themes instead of relying on Firstly, Secondly, Thirdly, and Lastly.
Lexical Resource
The vocabulary range is adequate for the topic, but frequent inaccurate collocations and countable-noun forms reduce precision.
Use natural forms such as accommodation, food, adapting to a new environment, employment prospects, and an international degree.
Grammatical Range and Accuracy
Simple and complex sentences generally convey the argument clearly, but agreement, articles, clause linking, and concession structures contain recurring errors.
Correct patterns such as the choice has disadvantages and Although fees are high, many scholarships are available.
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IELTS Writing Task 2
More and more students are choosing to study at colleges and universities in a foreign country. Do the benefits of studying abroad outweigh the drawbacks?
Your response
Write the task yourself, then compare your choices with the annotated response.