In many countries today there are many highly qualified graduates without employment. What factors, may have caused this situation and what, in your opinion, should be done about it? Write no less than 250 words.

Same question Compare 2 different answers (Band 5.5–6)

Sample Response

Today, mass migration of developing nations into Western countries has caused many professionals face finding job opportunities there. Apart from that, it is not uncommon that highly qualified graduates are not getting jobs in many countries. In my view, overpopulation, economic instability, certification and language barrier are leading reasons behind it, and governments of countries must consider some practical solutions to address them.

Obviously, one important factor why highly-qualified immigrants have encountered employment problems is that their educational degrees are not approved in the host country. For instance, a Middle East doctor moving to Canada has to pass several medical exams to be able to register in medical registration pathway. Had he graduated in a standard medical university, he would have admitted the needed requirements before moving to Canada; therefore, to tackle this issue, it is better the governments inform these immigrants more about the procedure of the certification pathway.

Another reason is language obstacle. Definitely, to be able to communicate with their surrounding or achieve a high score in English test, these people have to become as native speakers fluent, but it takes several months or even years. In this case, to become a psychologist in the USA, applicants have to speak English fluently and communicate with their patients the same natives speak with their clients. However, it may take more than two years these professionals to be able to reach their goal. To solve this problem, the administration should raise the educational budget for this group and give more study opportunities to these new immigrants to elevate their English level in a shorter period.

Apart from that, economic instability often creates job scarcity. Thus in those countries, many qualified graduates remain unemployed. Corruption, political instability and fewer job opening are other important reasons why many highly educated persons can’t find suitable jobs. The domains or corporations and business sectors have changed a lot and they require some specific requirement from their prospective employees like better communication and computer skills. The companies often seek for employees with less salary and that creates problems for highly skilled and educated students who prefer to remain unemployed rather than being poorly paid. The government should have a better control over the policies followed by the private organisations. They should not be allowed to follow whimsical hiring and firing policy. In conclusion, the number of jobless migrants who move and live in other developed countries permanently has considerably increased. I believe that language and qualification requirements are two obvious reasons behind it, and to solve them, the host country must help them to raise their professional and literature, according to the standards of the country they have selected as their permanent destination.

IELTS Writing Correction

  • 1. Use plural noun Original: barrier Suggested revision: barriers Why it matters: The countable item in this list should be plural.
  • 2. Correct the collocation Original: factor Suggested revision: reason Why it matters: Reason why is the appropriate construction for introducing a cause.
  • 3. Use adjective form Original: East Suggested revision: Eastern Why it matters: Middle Eastern is the adjectival form needed to describe the doctor.
  • 4. Add article and preposition Original: register in medical registration pathway Suggested revision: enter the medical registration pathway Why it matters: The pathway needs an article, and enter expresses joining it naturally.
  • 5. Choose precise wording Original: a standard medical university Suggested revision: a recognized medical school Why it matters: Recognized accurately describes an institution whose qualification is accepted.
  • 6. Correct word choice Original: would have admitted the needed requirements Suggested revision: would have understood the requirements Why it matters: Admitted does not mean became aware of or understood requirements.
  • 7. Use clear modal form Original: it is better the governments inform Suggested revision: governments should inform Why it matters: Should provides the correct grammatical form for this recommendation.
  • 8. Use natural phrase Original: Another reason is language obstacle Suggested revision: Another reason is the language barrier Why it matters: The language barrier is the conventional expression for this difficulty.
  • 9. Use plural noun Original: surrounding Suggested revision: surroundings Why it matters: Surroundings is the standard plural noun for the people and environment nearby.
  • 10. Fix articles and preposition Original: a high score in English test Suggested revision: a high score on an English test Why it matters: A score is received on a test, and the singular countable noun needs an article.
  • 11. Correct comparison order Original: become as native speakers fluent Suggested revision: become as fluent as native speakers Why it matters: The as...as comparison requires the adjective between the two markers.
  • 12. Complete comparison structure Original: the same natives speak with their clients Suggested revision: in the same way native speakers talk with their clients Why it matters: In the same way is needed to introduce this comparison of communication styles.

Suggested Rewrites

  • barrier barriers
  • factor reason
  • East Eastern
  • register in medical registration pathway enter the medical registration pathway
  • a standard medical university a recognized medical school
  • would have admitted the needed requirements would have understood the requirements
Overall assessment

Why this response received Band 6.0

The response offers a clear range of causes and some paired solutions, with the certification and language sections providing the strongest development. Its main limitation is that it repeatedly narrows a general graduate-unemployment question to migrants, while several later causes and remedies are listed or expressed unclearly. Prioritise answering the full national issue consistently and develop each selected cause with a precise, feasible response.

Band score breakdown

IELTS Writing Criteria Scores

TR

Task Response

6.0
Scoring rule

Both causes and solutions are addressed, but the response often substitutes migrant employment difficulties for the broader problem and develops some proposals unevenly.

Next step

Frame every body paragraph around highly qualified graduates in general and pair each major cause with a clearly explained, practical solution.

CC

Coherence and Cohesion

6.0
Scoring rule

Paragraphing and broad progression are clear, though the final body paragraph accumulates loosely connected points and the conclusion narrows the discussion again.

Next step

Use one cause-solution pair per paragraph and ensure the conclusion accurately synthesises the full range of the argument.

LR

Lexical Resource

6.0
Scoring rule

The response uses a reasonably broad topical vocabulary, but frequent collocation and word-choice problems make several statements awkward or imprecise.

Next step

Prioritise accurate common collocations for employment, qualifications, language proficiency, and government support before adding more ambitious wording.

GRA

Grammatical Range and Accuracy

5.5
Scoring rule

Simple and complex forms are attempted, but frequent errors with articles, agreement, word order, prepositions, and clause structure sometimes reduce clarity.

Next step

Edit each sentence for a complete clause structure, then check articles, plural nouns, and verb patterns systematically.

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IELTS Writing Task 2

In many countries today there are many highly qualified graduates without employment. What factors, may have caused this situation and what, in your opinion, should be done about it? Write no less than 250 words.

Your response

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