The age of Information Technology has taken a lot of people by surprise. While it has become a way of life for some, others know very little about it and maybe unlikely to learn. Eventually, as a result of this division, we will have a polarized society and this will lead to serious social problems. To what extent do you agree with this statement?
Sample Response
In today's contemporary world, technology has changed many aspects of our lifestyle and thus every work has been computerised. A group of people believes that everyone cannot learn how to use these devices and this eventually divides the society into two different sides. However, I personally disagree with them because of some main reasons, which are elucidated below. It is true that the speed of technology was on the increase in two last decades, but it prevails rapidly too. For example, my grandmother who has 80 years old, and she is uneducated and can use a cell phone as much as she needs, such as sending a message or dialling every mobile number. I mean, today, technology is not just for the young generation or people with high level of education. Furthermore, nowadays, we are witnesses of technology even in remote cities and villages. All of them have an access to two most important devices, the internet and the computer because everyone can buy these tools in reasonable price or even by monthly instalments. In addition, today children are taught in primary school to know how to use computers. As a result, if they cannot afford to purchase these gadgets, they will learn in school. While, there are many individuals who prefer to live in traditional ways. However, these differences cannot create divided society, because they choose this way for living themselves. All in all, from what has been discussed I pen down saying that technology is spreading all around the world and everyone can use it easily.
IELTS Writing Correction
- 1. Remove time redundancy Original: today's contemporary world Suggested revision: today's world Why it matters: Today's and contemporary express the same time reference, so one is redundant.
- 2. Use countable task noun Original: every work has been computerised Suggested revision: many tasks have been computerised Why it matters: Work is uncountable in this sense, while tasks accurately names separate activities.
- 3. Use direct plural subject Original: A group of people believes Suggested revision: Some people believe Why it matters: The plural construction is more direct and avoids awkward collective agreement.
- 4. Clarify partial negation Original: everyone cannot learn Suggested revision: not everyone can learn Why it matters: Not everyone accurately expresses that some people may be unable to learn.
- 5. Remove unnecessary article Original: divides the society Suggested revision: divides society Why it matters: Society takes no article when referring generally to the social system.
- 6. Name social groups Original: two different sides Suggested revision: two distinct groups Why it matters: Groups more accurately describes divisions among people than sides.
- 7. Remove redundant emphasis Original: I personally disagree Suggested revision: I disagree Why it matters: The first-person subject already makes the opinion personal.
- 8. Use reason preposition Original: because of some main reasons Suggested revision: for several main reasons Why it matters: For is the natural preposition introducing reasons for an opinion.
- 9. Name technological change Original: the speed of technology Suggested revision: the pace of technological change Why it matters: The revision precisely identifies what is changing quickly.
- 10. Use present perfect Original: was on the increase Suggested revision: has increased Why it matters: The change extends from the past two decades to the present, requiring the present perfect.
- 11. Correct time phrase Original: in two last decades Suggested revision: over the last two decades Why it matters: Over the last two decades is the standard phrase for this continuing period.
- 12. Use spread collocation Original: it prevails rapidly too Suggested revision: it is also spreading rapidly Why it matters: Prevail does not mean become more widespread, whereas spread expresses the intended change.
Suggested Rewrites
- today's contemporary world today's world
- every work has been computerised many tasks have been computerised
- A group of people believes Some people believe
- everyone cannot learn not everyone can learn
- divides the society divides society
- two different sides two distinct groups
Why this response received Band 5.5
The response maintains a clear disagreement and offers several relevant reasons, including older people's practical technology use, wider access, and school instruction. Its main weakness is that these points rely on broad assertions and do not adequately examine the predicted social polarisation and serious problems; the single-paragraph presentation and frequent language errors also reduce clarity. The priority is to develop a direct explanation of why the digital divide would or would not produce social harm.
IELTS Writing Criteria Scores
Task Response
A clear position is maintained and supported with relevant examples, but the response only briefly addresses the proposed social division and its consequences.
Explain directly how access, affordability, and education prevent polarisation, then evaluate at least one possible social problem before rejecting the claim.
Coherence and Cohesion
The progression from accessibility to education and personal choice is broadly understandable, but one unbroken paragraph and mechanical or inaccurate connectors weaken cohesion.
Organise the reasons into separate body paragraphs and use complete transitions instead of fragmentary combinations such as 'While' followed by 'However'.
Lexical Resource
The vocabulary covers the topic adequately, but frequent unnatural combinations such as 'every work', 'prevails rapidly', and 'in reasonable price' reduce precision.
Use established expressions such as 'most work has been computerised', 'technology is spreading rapidly', and 'at an affordable price'.
Grammatical Range and Accuracy
The response attempts complex sentences, but frequent errors in clause structure, articles, prepositions, agreement, and relative clauses sometimes strain readability.
Build shorter complete sentences first, then check article and preposition choices before combining ideas into complex structures.
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IELTS Writing Task 2
The age of Information Technology has taken a lot of people by surprise. While it has become a way of life for some, others know very little about it and maybe unlikely to learn. Eventually, as a result of this division, we will have a polarized society and this will lead to serious social problems. To what extent do you agree with this statement?
Your response
Write the task yourself, then compare your choices with the annotated response.