Increasing the price of petrol is the best way to solve the growing traffic and pollution problems. To what extent do you agree or disagree? What other measures do you think might be effective?
Sample Response
Escalating traffic congestion and environmental pollution have become pressing challenges in many urban areas. Some believe that increasing fuel prices is the most effective solution to these problems. While I agree that this measure can contribute to reducing both traffic and pollution, I believe that other, more comprehensive strategies should also be considered.
Increasing the price of fuel may reduce the excessive use of private vehicles, particularly in urban centres. When petrol becomes more expensive, individuals are more likely to reconsider their transportation choices, turning instead to public transport, cycling, or carpooling. Furthermore, this measure may encourage the use of cleaner energy alternatives, such as hybrid and electric vehicles, thereby reducing environmental degradation. For instance, countries like Norway have seen a significant increase in electric vehicle usage partly due to high fuel costs and incentives for clean energy. However, this solution can disproportionately affect low-income populations, making transportation less affordable and increasing the cost of essential goods due to higher distribution expenses.
Aside from raising fuel prices, other practical solutions should be implemented. Governments could impose limits on fuel consumption by restricting the use of petrol-driven vehicles on certain days and promoting the use of eco-friendly alternatives such as bicycles or electric buses. Additionally, public awareness campaigns can play a crucial role in changing attitudes toward sustainable living. For example, educational initiatives in schools and public media can promote car-free days and highlight the environmental costs of over-reliance on fossil fuels.
In conclusion, while increasing petrol prices can contribute to mitigating traffic and pollution issues, it is not a stand-alone solution. A combination of regulatory measures, public education, and investment in sustainable transport infrastructure would be far more effective in addressing these complex challenges.
IELTS Writing Correction
- 1. Improve collocation Original: Escalating Suggested revision: Worsening Why it matters: Worsening is the more natural modifier for an increasingly serious condition.
- 2. Remove unnecessary article Original: reduce the excessive use Suggested revision: reduce excessive use Why it matters: Use is an uncountable noun here and does not need the definite article.
- 3. Use concise wording Original: transportation Suggested revision: travel Why it matters: Travel choices is a more concise and natural expression in this context.
- 4. Match category and examples Original: energy Suggested revision: transport Why it matters: Vehicles are transport alternatives rather than forms of energy.
- 5. Use formal example marker Original: countries like Norway Suggested revision: countries such as Norway Why it matters: Such as introduces the named example more precisely in formal writing.
- 6. Improve noun choice Original: electric vehicle usage partly due to Suggested revision: electric vehicle use, partly due to Why it matters: Use is more natural than usage here, and the comma clearly marks the explanatory phrase.
- 7. Use precise reference Original: this solution can disproportionately affect low-income populations Suggested revision: this measure can disproportionately affect low-income people Why it matters: Measure refers more precisely to the price increase, while people is more natural than populations here.
- 8. Add administrative precision Original: certain Suggested revision: designated Why it matters: Designated makes clear that the restricted days would be officially selected.
- 9. Fix media collocation Original: public Suggested revision: the Why it matters: The media is the standard expression for public communication channels.
- 10. Use concise alternative Original: a stand-alone solution Suggested revision: sufficient on its own Why it matters: The revision states the limitation directly and avoids repeating solution from the surrounding discussion.
Suggested Rewrites
- Escalating Worsening
- reduce the excessive use reduce excessive use
- transportation travel
- energy transport
- countries like Norway countries such as Norway
- electric vehicle usage partly due to electric vehicle use, partly due to
Why this response received Band 8.0
The response's strongest feature is its clear, nuanced position, supported by a well-developed explanation of fuel pricing and several relevant alternative measures. The main limitation is that the alternatives are discussed somewhat briefly compared with the petrol-price argument. The highest-priority improvement is to select fewer additional measures and explain more precisely how each would reduce both congestion and pollution in practice.
IELTS Writing Criteria Scores
Task Response
The response directly answers both questions, maintains a clear qualified position, and develops relevant solutions with effective support.
Deepen the alternatives section by explaining the practical mechanism and likely impact of each selected measure on both stated problems.
Coherence and Cohesion
The essay is logically organized, with clear paragraph purposes and well-controlled progression from position to evaluation and alternatives.
Give the alternative measures slightly more structured development so their relative importance is easier to follow.
Lexical Resource
A wide and precise academic vocabulary is used naturally, with strong control of topic-specific collocations.
Increase precision further by distinguishing more consistently between measures targeting congestion and those primarily targeting emissions.
Grammatical Range and Accuracy
Complex sentence forms are varied and consistently accurate, with only negligible lapses in an otherwise highly controlled response.
Preserve this accuracy while using occasional shorter sentences to emphasize the central evaluative claims.
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IELTS Writing Task 2
Increasing the price of petrol is the best way to solve the growing traffic and pollution problems. To what extent do you agree or disagree? What other measures do you think might be effective?
Your response
Write the task yourself, then compare your choices with the annotated response.