Films that are based on true stories or historical events ought to be completely accurate. To what extent do you agree or disagree?
Sample Response
The authenticity of films that are based on true stories or historical events has been a subject of debate among filmmakers and audiences for a long with some arguing that these films should be completely accurate to preserve historical integrity. In this essay, I will express my agreement with the notion that films based on true events and historical facts should strive for the utmost accuracy.
Films that are based on true stories or historical events serve as an important medium for educating the masses about past events and their significance. Accuracy in these films is crucial to ensure that the audience gains a deeper understanding of history and its impact on society. When filmmakers take artistic liberties and alter historical facts, they risk misrepresenting significant events or individuals, which can lead to misconceptions and distortion of the truth. For example, the film "Schindler's List" directed by Steven Spielberg depicted the Holocaust and Oskar Schindler's efforts to save Jewish lives during World War II. The film's accuracy in portraying the atrocities of the Holocaust and Schindler's bravery contributed to its powerful impact on viewers, creating awareness and fostering empathy for the historical events it portrayed.
Moreover, films based on true stories often aim to honour the experiences and sacrifices of real people. Straying from accuracy can undermine the dignity and legacy of those who lived through the events. By maintaining fidelity to historical facts, filmmakers pay tribute to the individuals whose stories they tell, preserving their memory for future generations. For instance, the film "The Imitation Game" depicted the life of Alan Turing, a brilliant mathematician and codebreaker during World War II. Staying true to Turing's struggles and achievements not only celebrated his contributions but also shed light on the injustice he faced due to his sexuality.
In conclusion, films based on true stories or historical events hold immense value in preserving history and honouring the individuals involved. Striving for complete accuracy ensures that these films serve as credible and impactful sources of historical education and empathy.
IELTS Writing Correction
- 1. Complete the time phrase Original: for a long with some arguing Suggested revision: for a long time, with some arguing Why it matters: Time is required after a long, and the following supplementary phrase needs a comma.
- 2. State the claim directly Original: express my agreement with the notion that Suggested revision: argue that Why it matters: This concise verb avoids unnecessary metadiscourse and nominalisation.
- 3. Use current direct wording Original: serve as an important medium for educating the masses Suggested revision: serve as important tools for educating the public Why it matters: The revision matches the plural subject and avoids the dated phrase the masses.
- 4. Use parallel plural nouns Original: distortion Suggested revision: distortions Why it matters: Parallel coordinated nouns should both be plural in this general statement.
- 5. Set off the modifier Original: "Schindler's List" directed by Suggested revision: "Schindler's List," directed by Why it matters: The non-essential participial phrase needs a comma after the film title.
- 6. Use natural collocation Original: creating Suggested revision: raising Why it matters: English normally uses raise awareness rather than create awareness.
- 7. Clarify the empathy target Original: fostering empathy for the historical events Suggested revision: fostering empathy for those affected by the historical events Why it matters: Empathy is felt for people rather than for events themselves.
- 8. Use direct wording Original: maintaining fidelity to historical facts Suggested revision: remaining faithful to historical facts Why it matters: The adjective phrase is more direct than the abstract noun fidelity.
- 9. Use natural phrasing Original: hold immense value in preserving history Suggested revision: are immensely valuable for preserving history Why it matters: The revised collocation is more natural and concise.
- 10. Use precise formal wording Original: impactful Suggested revision: effective Why it matters: Effective is more established in formal writing than impactful.
Suggested Rewrites
- for a long with some arguing for a long time, with some arguing
- express my agreement with the notion that argue that
- serve as an important medium for educating the masses serve as important tools for educating the public
- distortion distortions
- "Schindler's List" directed by "Schindler's List," directed by
- creating raising
Why this response received Band 8.5
The essay gives a direct, consistently maintained position and develops two persuasive reasons with specific, well-integrated film examples. Organisation and vocabulary are notably controlled, while the main limitation is a small number of local grammatical or phrasing slips; the best refinement is to proofread the introduction and a few dense sentences so that accuracy matches the strength of the argument throughout.
IELTS Writing Criteria Scores
Task Response
The response fully addresses the proposition, sustains an unequivocal view, and develops both main reasons through precise and relevant examples.
For further refinement, briefly acknowledge the strongest practical counterargument before confirming why historical accuracy should still prevail.
Coherence and Cohesion
The argument is exceptionally easy to follow, with purposeful paragraphing, clear progression, and cohesive devices that rarely draw attention to themselves.
Keep the opening sentence syntactically cleaner so the essay begins with the same effortless flow maintained in the body paragraphs.
Lexical Resource
A wide and precise vocabulary, including nuanced historical and ethical language, is used flexibly with only rare awkwardness.
Continue refining occasional stock or slightly cumbersome phrasing to make an already sophisticated lexical style even more natural.
Grammatical Range and Accuracy
A broad range of complex structures is handled accurately, with only rare local slips that do not affect clarity.
Proofread introductory and multi-clause sentences for omitted words or punctuation so that minor lapses are eliminated.
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IELTS Writing Task 2
Films that are based on true stories or historical events ought to be completely accurate. To what extent do you agree or disagree?
Your response
Write the task yourself, then compare your choices with the annotated response.