Students who go directly from school to university benefit less from and contribute less to their courses than those who take a job or travel in order to get more experience in ‘real world’ before they start higher education. To what extent do you agree or disagree with this statement.

Same question Compare 2 different answers (Band 6)

Sample Response

Higher education is the precursor to success in today's competitive world. Thus, every individual want to have a professional degree after schooling. After higher secondary, whether one should directly go to a university, or he/she should take a break before higher education, has always sparked a highly intense debate. In my opinion, a break is very much important for professional growth, at the same time it also helps in increasing focus at studies. Firstly, it is very apparent that in order to reduce training cost, companies nowadays prefer skilled professional rather than a mere fresher. Thus, break in studies and investing the same time for gaining a relevant experience, will make the students prepared for the professional challenges. For instance, the Indian IT giant "Infosys", which annually fire almost 20% of fresher hired by them. This number can be highly reduced if the employees are already trained for the job. Hence, it can be easily stated that the gap-year taken by students, when invested for proper training, will help them in future. Moreover, after 12-14 years of rigorous studying, a gap-year would act as a refresher for the students. They can plan their future studies in the meantime. Talking about my personal experience; my elder brother after his 12th standard in science, was fully prepared to have an honours degree in Mathematics, as Math was the subject which had always excited him. But, after having one-year training in an IT company, he realised the scope in IT field. The professional growth in IT was exponential as compared to a linear growth in the field of Math. Thus, after rejoining his studies he went for an Engineering degree in "Computer Science", which catalysed his career growth. Today, he is well settled, and is drawing a handsome salary! Now, after stating this we can easily say that the gap-year can work wonders, with respect to the decision making of a student. After analysing the above points, we are in a position to safely conclude that, gap-year is something which every student should opt for. This will be helpful in terms of their professional growth and plans for their future. It is also believed that in the coming future, more and more students will take a break from studies before joining the university and will invest that gap for getting themselves trained.

IELTS Writing Correction

  • 1. Fix subject-verb agreement Original: want Suggested revision: wants Why it matters: The singular subject “every individual” requires the singular verb “wants”.
  • 2. Use a standard term Original: After higher secondary Suggested revision: After secondary school Why it matters: “After secondary school” is the natural international expression for this education stage.
  • 3. Remove redundant emphasis Original: highly intense debate Suggested revision: intense debate Why it matters: “Intense” already conveys a high degree, so “highly” is unnecessary.
  • 4. Use the plural noun Original: cost Suggested revision: costs Why it matters: The general expense of training employees is naturally expressed in the plural.
  • 5. Use the plural form Original: professional Suggested revision: professionals Why it matters: The countable noun must agree with the general plural comparison about employees.
  • 6. Use professional wording Original: rather than a mere fresher Suggested revision: rather than inexperienced graduates Why it matters: The replacement is clearer and more appropriate in an academic discussion of recruitment.
  • 7. Add the article Original: break in studies Suggested revision: a break from studies Why it matters: A singular countable “break” needs an article, and “from studies” is the natural preposition.
  • 8. Correct the gerund phrase Original: the same time for gaining a relevant experience Suggested revision: that time in gaining relevant experience Why it matters: “Invest time in doing something” is the required pattern, and “experience” is uncountable here.
  • 9. Use the direct verb Original: make the students prepared Suggested revision: better prepare students Why it matters: “Prepare students” is the natural transitive construction for developing readiness.
  • 10. Use the right adverb Original: highly Suggested revision: significantly Why it matters: “Significantly” naturally describes a substantial reduction in a number.
  • 11. Correct the preposition Original: invested for proper training Suggested revision: used for relevant training Why it matters: Time is “used for” training, while “invested” would require “in”.
  • 12. Use the noun form Original: studying Suggested revision: study Why it matters: The uncountable noun “study” is more natural after a duration of years.

Suggested Rewrites

  • want wants
  • After higher secondary After secondary school
  • highly intense debate intense debate
  • cost costs
  • professional professionals
  • rather than a mere fresher rather than inexperienced graduates
Overall assessment

Why this response received Band 6.0

The response maintains a clear preference for taking a gap year and develops its employability and decision-making benefits with relevant examples. However, it addresses professional outcomes more than the prompt’s specific claim about how prior experience affects students’ benefit from and contribution to university courses, while recurring language errors reduce precision. The priority is to organize separate arguments around those two course-related outcomes and support each directly.

Band score breakdown

IELTS Writing Criteria Scores

TR

Task Response

5.5
Scoring rule

A clear position and developed gap-year benefits are present, but the specific issues of benefiting from and contributing to university courses are insufficiently addressed.

Next step

Build separate, explicit arguments showing how work or travel experience improves learning from a course and contribution to classmates or course activities.

CC

Coherence and Cohesion

6.0
Scoring rule

The ideas follow a broadly logical sequence, although the single extended paragraph and frequent signposting make progression less controlled.

Next step

Divide the argument into focused body paragraphs and use references between sentences instead of repeatedly announcing each step.

LR

Lexical Resource

6.0
Scoring rule

The response shows adequate range for education and employment, but recurring word-choice and collocation problems reduce precision.

Next step

Replace awkward combinations such as investing time for experience and scope in a field with natural academic collocations.

GRA

Grammatical Range and Accuracy

6.0
Scoring rule

Simple and complex forms both appear, but recurring errors with agreement, articles, plurals, punctuation, and sentence boundaries remain noticeable.

Next step

Check every clause for a finite verb and then edit systematically for subject-verb agreement and article use.

Put the feedback to work

Write this task while it is fresh

Try the same task now. It helps you remember the feedback and write better next time.

IELTS Writing Task 2

Students who go directly from school to university benefit less from and contribute less to their courses than those who take a job or travel in order to get more experience in ‘real world’ before they start higher education. To what extent do you agree or disagree with this statement.

Your response

Words0
40:00

Write the task yourself, then compare your choices with the annotated response.