You recently bought some train tickets for a journey a week in advance. When you went to the station to catch the train, you were told you could not use the tickets and the staff were very unhelpful to you. Write a letter to the train company. In your letter: - describe the problem you had with the tickets - say why you were unhappy with the staff - suggest what action the train company should take
Sample Response
Dear Sir or Madam,
I am writing to formally complain about an issue I faced while attempting to travel with your company a week ago. I hope you will take the necessary actions to address the issue and make sure it does not happen in the future.
In relation to the problem that I faced, on 5th February, I purchased three train tickets online for a journey from Manchester to London on 11th February. However, upon arriving at the station with my parents, I was informed that our tickets were invalid, despite having received confirmation at the time of purchase. The explanation from your staff was vague and I was not given a clear reason why our tickets were not valid for the journey!
What disappointed me even more was the unhelpful attitude of the staff. Instead of assisting me in resolving the issue, they simply stated that I could not board the train and made no effort to explain the reason behind it. Their dismissive behaviour left me and my parents feeling frustrated and stranded, especially as we had important commitments in London that day.
Given this inconvenience, I kindly request a full refund for our unusable tickets and proper compensation for the situation. Additionally, I urge you to provide better staff training in customer service to ensure passengers receive appropriate support in such situations.
I look forward to your prompt response.
Yours faithfully,
Eva Watson
IELTS Writing Correction
- 1. Use natural phrasing Original: formally complain Suggested revision: make a formal complaint Why it matters: This collocation is more natural in a formal complaint letter.
- 2. Choose precise wording Original: an issue I faced Suggested revision: a problem I encountered Why it matters: This wording describes the travel problem more precisely.
- 3. Use singular action Original: the necessary actions Suggested revision: the necessary action Why it matters: The uncountable singular form is more idiomatic for a general response.
- 4. Strengthen formal tone Original: make sure Suggested revision: ensure Why it matters: This concise verb suits the formal register of the letter.
- 5. Tighten the transition Original: In relation to the problem that I faced Suggested revision: Regarding this problem Why it matters: The shorter transition avoids repeating information from the introduction.
- 6. Clarify the subject Original: upon arriving Suggested revision: when I arrived Why it matters: An explicit subject makes the time clause immediately clear.
- 7. Specify the confirmation Original: despite having received confirmation Suggested revision: even though I had received a booking confirmation Why it matters: Naming the booking confirmation makes the contrast more precise.
- 8. Use direct wording Original: was vague Suggested revision: was unclear Why it matters: This directly identifies the problem with the staff's explanation.
- 9. State the purpose directly Suggested revision: Open by identifying the unusable tickets and the journey date before requesting action. Why it matters: A more specific opening would let the company identify the complaint immediately.
- 10. Detail the staff response Suggested revision: Add one concrete example of what assistance you requested and how the staff responded. Why it matters: A specific interaction would substantiate the complaint about unhelpful service.
Suggested Rewrites
- formally complain make a formal complaint
- an issue I faced a problem I encountered
- the necessary actions the necessary action
- make sure ensure
- In relation to the problem that I faced Regarding this problem
- upon arriving when I arrived
Why this response received Band 8.0
This formal complaint is clear, fully purposeful, and well developed, with all three requested points addressed through specific journey details and a suitable request for redress. Its main limitation is minor repetition and occasional overstatement, particularly around the invalid tickets and compensation; tightening those phrases and keeping the punctuation consistently restrained would make an already persuasive letter more polished.
IELTS Writing Criteria Scores
Detailed feedback by IELTS writing criterion after the annotated essay.
Task Achievement
The letter fully achieves its purpose, covers every bullet point with relevant detail, and maintains an appropriately formal tone.
Specify the form or amount of compensation sought so the requested action is as concrete as the account of the problem.
Coherence and Cohesion
Information progresses logically from the complaint's purpose through the ticket and staff problems to the requested remedies, with clear paragraphing.
Reduce repetition of issue, tickets, and valid by using slightly tighter referencing across adjacent sentences.
Lexical Resource
Vocabulary is flexible and precise for a formal complaint, with effective choices such as dismissive behaviour, stranded, and full refund.
Refine broad phrases such as proper compensation for the situation into more exact and natural wording.
Grammatical Range and Accuracy
A wide range of complex structures is used accurately, and the response is largely error-free throughout.
Use restrained sentence-ending punctuation in the formal account, replacing the exclamation mark with a full stop.