What discovery in the last 100 years has been most beneficial for people in your country? Use specific reasons and examples to support your choice.
Sample Response
I am from Russia. In my opinion, the most beneficial discovery for people in our country has been the discovery of the outer space. Russia is the first country that launched a spacecraft with a man on the board into space. This event was a big step towards the new discoveries and brought many benefits not only for people in my country. Bellow I will give my reasons to support my answer. First of all, all humankind made a huge step towards the mystery of our creation. Scientists had the opportunity to do the new research and experiments. Many new discoveries were made on the boards of the spacecraft in the outer space. People from all over the world watched these events. Many books with real colourful photos were written about the beginning of the space exploration. Nowadays we have a big station called "Mir" in the outer space created on the base of collaboration USA and Russia. Many people work there doing amazing experiments. From the beginning of the mankind till now people are searching some unanswered question and I believe those answers are hidden between the outer space and the journey to the outer space has opened the door of possibility to find those answers. Though it’s still the part of a science fiction that human will live outside the world someday but I believe that it’s the ultimate fact for us. Secondly, the world became "smaller". People learnt how to exchange information very quickly by use of satellites. Television is broadcasted all over the world by use of satellites. Here in Houston, I can watch Russian programs. People got the opportunity to exchange news very quickly. The latest telecommunication systems have made the world even smaller. It takes only a few seconds to know the news around the whole world through satellite TV channels. The defence department uses these satellite technologies to get updated data about crime and criminal. To sum up, I believe that space exploration will bring much more benefits in the future and someday we will learn what is beyond our current galaxy.
IELTS Writing Correction
- 1. Name the development Original: discovery of the outer space Suggested revision: exploration of outer space Why it matters: “Exploration of outer space” accurately names the development described in the essay.
- 2. Fix tense structure Original: is the first country that launched Suggested revision: was the first country to launch Why it matters: The completed historical event requires past tense and the infinitive construction.
- 3. Fix expression Original: a man on the board Suggested revision: a man on board Why it matters: The fixed expression for travelling in a vehicle is “on board.”
- 4. Remove article Original: towards the new discoveries Suggested revision: towards new discoveries Why it matters: The plural noun is used generally, so “the” is unnecessary.
- 5. Correct spelling Original: Bellow Suggested revision: Below Why it matters: “Below” is the correct spelling of the linking word.
- 6. Clarify direction Original: towards the mystery Suggested revision: towards understanding the mystery Why it matters: A step can move towards understanding a mystery, rather than towards the mystery itself.
- 7. Use academic collocation Original: do the new research Suggested revision: conduct new research Why it matters: “Conduct research” is the standard academic collocation.
- 8. Fix fixed phrase Original: on the boards of the spacecraft Suggested revision: on board spacecraft Why it matters: The correct construction is “on board,” without a plural noun or article.
- 9. Remove article Original: the beginning of the space exploration Suggested revision: the beginning of space exploration Why it matters: “Space exploration” is an uncountable field of activity and takes no article here.
- 10. Fix time phrase Original: From the beginning of the mankind till now Suggested revision: From the beginning of humankind until now Why it matters: “Humankind” takes no article, and “until now” completes the time range naturally.
- 11. Fix number Original: question Suggested revision: questions Why it matters: “Some” requires a plural count noun in this meaning.
- 12. Remove articles Original: the part of a science fiction Suggested revision: part of science fiction Why it matters: Neither “part” nor the genre name needs an article in this construction.
Suggested Rewrites
- discovery of the outer space exploration of outer space
- is the first country that launched was the first country to launch
- a man on the board a man on board
- towards the new discoveries towards new discoveries
- Bellow Below
- towards the mystery towards understanding the mystery
Why this response received Band 6.0
The response makes a clear choice and offers two recognisable areas of benefit, particularly scientific research and satellite communication. However, much of the discussion remains general, speculative, or only loosely connected to benefits for people in Russia, and language errors recur throughout. The highest priority is to select specific national benefits, explain them with precise examples, and edit awkward sentence structures and collocations.
IELTS Writing Criteria Scores
Task Response
The chosen discovery is clear and supported by relevant benefits, but the national focus and specific evidence are unevenly developed.
Explain two concrete ways space exploration has benefited people in Russia and support each with a directly relevant example.
Coherence and Cohesion
The ideas follow a recognisable introduction, two-reason sequence, and conclusion, although repetition and some overlong sentences weaken progression.
Separate the response into purposeful paragraphs and remove repeated points about rapid information exchange.
Lexical Resource
Topic-specific vocabulary gives the response some range, but frequent spelling, word-form, and collocational problems limit precision.
Use more natural combinations such as “aboard a spacecraft,” “conduct research,” and “through satellites,” and check spelling carefully.
Grammatical Range and Accuracy
The response attempts varied complex structures, but article, plural, preposition, agreement, and clause-control errors occur frequently.
Build complex sentences from accurately controlled clauses and proofread recurring article and noun-number errors.
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IELTS Writing Task 2
What discovery in the last 100 years has been most beneficial for people in your country? Use specific reasons and examples to support your choice.
Your response
Write the task yourself, then compare your choices with the annotated response.