Every year several languages die out. Some people think that this is not important because life will be easier if there are fewer languages in the world. To what extent do you agree or disagree with this opinion?
Sample Response
Some languages are disappearing each year due to the growing dominance of international languages. While this phenomenon has some negative consequences according to some, I believe that it ultimately makes life easier and more convenient. This essay will argue in favour of the statement that the extinction of some very minor languages is not a big concern, and our life would be easier if we had fewer languages.
To begin with, having fewer languages will enhance global communication and social interaction. If people speak a common language, they would no longer need to learn multiple languages or struggle with language barriers when travelling, working, or studying abroad. This would significantly improve people's ability to socialize and interact with individuals from different nationalities. For example, English, widely recognized as an international language, enables people to communicate effectively on social media platforms, allowing them to exchange ideas and engage in global discussions without linguistic difficulties.
Additionally, the use of a common language can reduce social and cultural discrimination. When people share a single language, they can maintain relationships more easily, regardless of nationality, race, religion, or economic background. For instance, in England, where English is the dominant language, there is relatively little social division based on language. In contrast, India, with its vast number of regional languages, experiences significant cultural and social disparities between different linguistic groups. By unifying people through language, societies can foster a greater sense of community and national identity.
In conclusion, while the decline of linguistic diversity may pose challenges for cultural preservation, it also offers significant advantages in terms of improved global communication and social unity. Therefore, we should not be too much concerned about the disappearing languages as fewer languages will make life and communication easier.
IELTS Writing Correction
- 1. Use precise term Original: some very minor languages Suggested revision: some minority languages Why it matters: Minority languages is a more precise term for languages spoken by relatively small communities.
- 2. Use formal wording Original: big Suggested revision: major Why it matters: Major concern is more suitably formal for an academic essay.
- 3. Use plural noun Original: life Suggested revision: lives Why it matters: The plural possessive determiner our requires lives when referring to people's individual lives.
- 4. Match conditional form Original: speak Suggested revision: spoke Why it matters: The past form spoke correctly matches the hypothetical result expressed with would.
- 5. Remove redundancy Original: socialize and interact Suggested revision: interact Why it matters: Socialize and interact overlap in meaning here, so one verb is sufficient.
- 6. Improve collocation Original: individuals from different nationalities Suggested revision: people of different nationalities Why it matters: People of different nationalities is the natural collocation for this meaning.
- 7. Use concise wording Original: social media platforms Suggested revision: social media Why it matters: Social media already identifies the communication medium, making platforms unnecessary here.
- 8. Clarify discrimination Original: social and cultural discrimination Suggested revision: discrimination between social and cultural groups Why it matters: The revision makes clear who experiences the discrimination rather than ambiguously classifying its type.
- 9. Correct degree phrase Original: should not be too much concerned Suggested revision: should not be overly concerned Why it matters: Overly correctly modifies the adjective concerned, whereas too much does not fit this construction.
- 10. Remove generic article Original: the disappearing languages Suggested revision: disappearing languages Why it matters: The article is unnecessary because the phrase refers to disappearing languages in general.
- 11. Sentence rewrite Original: While this phenomenon has some negative consequences according to some, I believe that it ultimately makes life easier and more convenient. Suggested revision: While some people believe this phenomenon has negative consequences, I believe that it ultimately makes life easier and more convenient. Why it matters: Moving the attribution to the opening clause makes the contrast and ownership of each view immediately clear.
Suggested Rewrites
- some very minor languages some minority languages
- big major
- life lives
- speak spoke
- socialize and interact interact
- individuals from different nationalities people of different nationalities
Why this response received Band 7.5
The response presents a consistent position in a clearly organised essay, with fluent discussion of communication and social unity. Its main limitation is that key support, especially the England–India comparison, relies on broad claims rather than carefully justified evidence; the highest-priority improvement is to develop more precise causal reasoning and directly address the cultural cost of language loss before rebutting it.
IELTS Writing Criteria Scores
Task Response
The response answers the question directly, maintains a clear position, and develops two relevant reasons with examples.
Strengthen the argument by examining the cultural consequences of language loss and supporting comparisons with more credible, specific reasoning.
Coherence and Cohesion
Ideas progress logically through a clear introduction, focused body paragraphs, and a conclusion, with cohesive links used effectively.
Make transitions less formulaic by linking each paragraph more explicitly to the central claim and to the preceding reasoning.
Lexical Resource
A varied and generally precise vocabulary supports discussion of communication, linguistic diversity, discrimination, and cultural preservation.
Refine awkward or overly broad word choices such as references to minor languages and social discrimination to improve precision and tone.
Grammatical Range and Accuracy
A wide range of complex structures is used accurately, and the few errors do not impede meaning.
Check conditional consistency and natural phrasing in constructions such as the hypothetical sentence about people speaking a common language.
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IELTS Writing Task 2
Every year several languages die out. Some people think that this is not important because life will be easier if there are fewer languages in the world. To what extent do you agree or disagree with this opinion?
Your response
Write the task yourself, then compare your choices with the annotated response.