Today, the quality of life in large cities is decreasing. What could be the reasons behind this? What measures can be taken to resolve this problem?
Sample Response
Rapid industrialisation and urbanisation from the beginning of this century have drastically changed the urban landscape and brought unprecedented possibilities and opportunities - but not without the cost of declining living standards for city dwellers. Exponential population growth and unplanned urbanisation are the primary reasons for this declining quality of life. Proper urban planning, investing in public transports and offering government subsidies could be some effective solutions, in my opinion.
The prosperity and opportunity in big cities have attracted a huge number of people and the inrush of the population to major cities all around the world paradoxically made life difficult for all. With the ever-increasing inhabitants, cities become overcrowded, expensive, competitive and polluted. Growing competition shoot the property rent, makes employment difficult and increases traffic congestions. For example, the higher residents in many capital cities around the world make them congested, exorbitantly expensive and polluted. Therefore, urban citizens, especially the less well off, often experience a lower standard of living and get exposed to the negative sides of urban life.
Considering the solutions, first, better planning is required. Some important amenities like public parks, sports centres, alternative roads and other infrastructures and facilities could dramatically enhance people's quality of living. Extensive investment in public transports would ease traffic congestion and make better transportation accessible to all. In theory, this would reduce air pollution, and possibly improve the well-being of the population. Finally, the government has to heavily subsidise important sectors like healthcare, education and entertainment so that they do not get more expensive and unaffordable by poor and middle-class people.
To conclude, the city attracts large population inflows basically with the promises of a better life, which, paradoxically then cause pressure on existing infrastructure, living costs and life standard. To mitigate such drawbacks, we need to have proper solutions including better planning and more government subsidies.
IELTS Writing Correction
- 1. Use duration preposition Original: from Suggested revision: since Why it matters: Since correctly marks the starting point of a period continuing to the present.
- 2. Remove near repetition Original: possibilities and opportunities Suggested revision: opportunities Why it matters: The two nouns substantially overlap, so one precise term is sufficient.
- 3. Use concise contrast Original: not without the cost of Suggested revision: at the cost of Why it matters: The direct phrase expresses the negative trade-off more concisely.
- 4. Use uncountable transport Original: transports Suggested revision: transport Why it matters: Public transport is uncountable when referring to a transport system generally.
- 5. Remove unnecessary hedging Original: some effective solutions, in my opinion Suggested revision: effective solutions Why it matters: The proposal is already framed as the writer's view, so both some and the final hedge are unnecessary.
- 6. Use plural opportunities Original: opportunity Suggested revision: opportunities Why it matters: Opportunity is countable here and refers to the many attractions cities offer.
- 7. Use natural migration term Original: the inrush of the population Suggested revision: the influx of people Why it matters: Influx of people is the conventional phrase for a large movement into cities.
- 8. Fix the opening phrase Original: With the ever-increasing inhabitants Suggested revision: As populations grow Why it matters: The original with-phrase incorrectly treats inhabitants as a quantity that increases.
- 9. Use present perfect Original: cities become overcrowded Suggested revision: cities have become overcrowded Why it matters: The present perfect links the continuing population growth to its current result.
- 10. Fix agreement and verb Original: Growing competition shoot Suggested revision: Growing competition drives up Why it matters: The singular subject requires a singular verb, and drives up is the correct collocation for prices.
- 11. Use plural rents Original: the property rent Suggested revision: property rents Why it matters: The general cost category is naturally expressed with the plural noun rents.
- 12. Clarify employment access Original: makes employment difficult Suggested revision: makes finding employment difficult Why it matters: The gerund phrase correctly identifies the activity that becomes difficult.
Suggested Rewrites
- from since
- possibilities and opportunities opportunities
- not without the cost of at the cost of
- transports transport
- some effective solutions, in my opinion effective solutions
- opportunity opportunities
Why this response received Band 7.0
The essay clearly addresses both causes and solutions, with logical body paragraphs and relevant links from rapid urban growth to overcrowding, costs, transport pressure, and pollution. Its main limitation is recurring imprecision in grammar and collocation, which makes several otherwise strong points sound awkward, while some solutions are asserted more than explained. Prioritise accurate noun forms and agreement, then show more explicitly how each proposed measure improves daily urban life.
IELTS Writing Criteria Scores
Task Response
The response addresses both parts with relevant causes and several practical measures, though some solutions receive only brief explanation.
Explain the mechanism and likely effect of subsidies as fully as the discussion of transport investment and pollution.
Coherence and Cohesion
The essay progresses clearly from causes to solutions and conclusion, with focused paragraphs and generally effective linking.
Reduce repetition of overcrowding and pollution in the cause paragraph and use that space to deepen one causal chain.
Lexical Resource
The response shows good topic range, but frequent inaccurate collocations and countable-noun forms reduce lexical precision.
Use standard phrases such as 'public transport', 'an influx of people', 'higher rents', 'traffic congestion', and 'infrastructure'.
Grammatical Range and Accuracy
Complex structures are attempted successfully, but agreement, article, plural, and relative-clause errors recur across the essay.
Proofread subject-verb agreement in sentences such as 'competition drives up rents' and 'population inflows cause pressure'.
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IELTS Writing Task 2
Today, the quality of life in large cities is decreasing. What could be the reasons behind this? What measures can be taken to resolve this problem?
Your response
Write the task yourself, then compare your choices with the annotated response.