People attend colleges or universities for many different reasons (for example, new experiences, career preparation, increased knowledge). Why do you think people attend colleges or universities?
Sample Response
Students attend formal educational institutes for many different factors. I personally believe that knowledge has multiple dimensional impacts in personality making. Higher education centres help the people in learning of knowledge, skill, communication, competitive lifestyle, grooming, personality making and building of confidence and career. Some people join them for the sake of getting degrees only.
A few decades ago people were not well averred about a variety of education and about the outcome of certain degree and skill. Nowadays the trend has increased for youth in attending universities and colleges. Huge proportions of people plan their career and then get their education accordingly. Some students opt to these institutes for the sake of professional education. Doctors, engineers, financial consultant learn knowledge, skill, implementation of knowledge and also get degree and licence to practice from these organisations. These institutes provide competitive environments that make them more polished and skilled. Some students get indulged into politics and after their education, they choose politics as their career.
Although most of the students join these institutes in very purposeful manner but some people join them unplanned. Children of elite class join these education centres for the sake of fun only. Few female students complete their education very successfully and after completing their studies they like to get married and keep on staying at their home.
Just for the sake of comparison if we analyse people who got their education from universities and colleges with those who got these degrees by studying distant education resources, we will get amazing differences. Students from many prestigious institutions will be better groomed, professional and hard working as compared to others.
In short colleges and universities improve the human personality from many angles. They award degrees and try to make the wonderful citizens also. To summarise, higher education centres are mandatory in building a Nation.
IELTS Writing Correction
- 1. Use correct noun Original: factors Suggested revision: reasons Why it matters: Reasons are motivations for attending, whereas factors are influences or conditions.
- 2. Use concise wording Original: for the sake of getting degrees only Suggested revision: solely to obtain degrees Why it matters: The revision expresses the same limited purpose more concisely and formally.
- 3. Correct the word choice Original: averred Suggested revision: informed Why it matters: Averred means stated, while informed conveys awareness or knowledge.
- 4. Clarify the range Original: a variety of education Suggested revision: the range of educational options Why it matters: The revision clearly refers to the different forms of education available.
- 5. Use plural forms Original: outcome of certain degree and skill Suggested revision: outcomes of particular degrees and skills Why it matters: The general reference covers multiple qualifications and abilities, so plural nouns are required.
- 6. Use natural quantifier Original: Huge proportions of people Suggested revision: Many people Why it matters: Proportion requires a specified group, while many directly quantifies people here.
- 7. Use distributive plural Original: career Suggested revision: careers Why it matters: The plural refers to the separate career of each person in the group.
- 8. Correct verb pattern Original: opt to these institutes Suggested revision: choose these institutions Why it matters: Opt does not take to before a noun destination in this meaning.
- 9. State purpose directly Original: for the sake of professional education Suggested revision: to gain professional qualifications Why it matters: The revision expresses the intended purpose more directly and precisely.
- 10. Use parallel plurals Original: Doctors, engineers, financial consultant Suggested revision: Doctors, engineers and financial consultants Why it matters: All three occupations refer generally to multiple people and should be plural.
- 11. Use natural learning terms Original: learn knowledge, skill, implementation of knowledge Suggested revision: gain knowledge, skills and practical experience Why it matters: The revision uses natural collocations for the academic and practical learning described.
- 12. Use plural objects Original: get degree and licence Suggested revision: obtain degrees and licences Why it matters: The general list of professionals requires plural qualifications and a formal verb.
Suggested Rewrites
- factors reasons
- for the sake of getting degrees only solely to obtain degrees
- averred informed
- a variety of education the range of educational options
- outcome of certain degree and skill outcomes of particular degrees and skills
- Huge proportions of people Many people
Why this response received Band 5.5
The response identifies several relevant motives for higher education, especially career preparation, qualifications and personal development. Its main limitation is uneven focus: ideas are often listed rather than explained, while the discussion of wealthy or female students and the distance-learning comparison is weakly connected to the question; frequent grammatical and collocational errors further reduce clarity. The highest priority is to organise two or three central reasons into focused, fully explained paragraphs.
IELTS Writing Criteria Scores
Task Response
Several relevant reasons are presented, but their development is uneven and some discussion becomes tangential or relies on unsupported generalisations.
Select the strongest reasons, such as career preparation and personal growth, and support each with a clear explanation and relevant example.
Coherence and Cohesion
Paragraphing is present and the broad topic remains identifiable, but progression is loose because ideas are listed, repeated or introduced without clear relationships.
Give each body paragraph one controlling reason and use topic sentences and concluding links to show how it answers the question.
Lexical Resource
The vocabulary covers education and employment adequately, but frequent inaccurate choices and awkward collocations restrict precision and naturalness.
Replace expressions such as personality making, opt to these institutes and studying distant education resources with established academic collocations.
Grammatical Range and Accuracy
Both simple and complex forms are attempted, but frequent errors in articles, agreement, plurality, prepositions and clause construction reduce control.
Edit sentence by sentence for article use and complete clause structure, particularly after although, in comparisons and in lists of professions.
Write this task while it is fresh
Try the same task now. It helps you remember the feedback and write better next time.
IELTS Writing Task 2
People attend colleges or universities for many different reasons (for example, new experiences, career preparation, increased knowledge). Why do you think people attend colleges or universities?
Your response
Write the task yourself, then compare your choices with the annotated response.