Schools and libraries should ban computer games from their premises to stop students from wasting time. To what extent do you agree or disagree?
Sample Response
Computer games have their advantages in terms of enhancing imagination, hand-eye coordination, cognitive development and increasing computer skillscomputer operational skills. However, this is a double-edged sword thatwhich can negatively affect students if they spend too much time on computer games and become addicted to themget addicted to those games. I completely agree that computer games should be prohibited on school and library premisesprohibited in classrooms, schools and libraries. There are various reasons for my opinion and the following paragraphs will discuss my reasons in detaildetails.
First of all, schoolsacademic boundaries and libraries are primarily for gathering knowledge, learning new lessons and focusing on studyingstudy. If students start playing computer games in classrooms and in libraries, they will definitely be distracted from their studiestheir main objective in schools and thus they will perform very poorly in exams. This will have very negative consequences for botha very negative consequence both on the school authorities and students. Hence, banningHence banning computer games from school and library premises is a good idea.
Second, computer games are very addictive, especially the modern strategic games that require hour after hourhours after hours of play at a computerfor a gamer to play in front of computers. Those games are obviously more alluring for young students and if they are allowed, they will playif they are allowed they will play those digital games all day long. This is a huge waste of valuable time which could have been used for learning new things and for gathering knowledge.
Again, every activity has its proper place and timeproper places and times. Banning computer games from school premises only makesmake sure that students spend their time prudently. If someone finds computer games informative and helpful, he can play it home or in other places than the schools and libraries. Finally, too much computer games can decrease a student’s eye-sight, negatively affect his psychology and can increase violent activities which would be very detrimental to the future of a student. The bloodshed and violence used in many computer games would definitely ruin the peaceful environment a school premise needs to ensure quality education.
Considering all the above points, I strongly agree that completely banning computer games in school and library premises is a very good idea for the betterment of all.
Why this response received Band 7.0
The response sustains a clear position and organises several relevant reasons into a readily followed argument, with the distinction between school use and play elsewhere adding useful nuance. Its main limitation is recurring imprecision in grammar and collocation, alongside some exaggerated claims that receive little support. The highest-priority improvement is to develop fewer reasons with credible explanation while correcting agreement, countability, and preposition errors.
IELTS Writing Criteria Scores
Task Response
A clear agreement position is maintained and supported by several relevant reasons, although some later claims are asserted rather than developed.
Prioritise the strongest reasons and support each with a realistic explanation or example instead of adding broad health and violence claims.
Coherence and Cohesion
Ideas are arranged in a clear paragraph sequence with effective overall progression, though some linking is formulaic.
Use more meaning-based transitions between reasons and integrate the final supporting points into a more unified paragraph.
Lexical Resource
The response displays a good range of topic vocabulary, but recurring awkward collocations and word-form choices reduce precision.
Improve natural combinations such as educational settings, for hours on end, play at home, and violent behaviour.
Grammatical Range and Accuracy
A mix of simple and complex structures communicates ideas clearly, but agreement, countability, article, and preposition errors recur.
Check singular-plural agreement and countable forms, especially in phrases involving games, premises, and a student's eyesight.
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IELTS Writing Task 2
Schools and libraries should ban computer games from their premises to stop students from wasting time. To what extent do you agree or disagree?
Your response
Write the task yourself, then compare your choices with the annotated response.