Life has become much more stressful compared to our parent’s generation. As a result, stress-related illnesses are increasing around the world. Why is stress such widespread in the modern world? What do you think can be done to overcome the problems caused by stress?
Sample Response
Stress harms us from withinslays us from the inside and can lead to personal, social, physical and psychological issues that drive us to the verge of collapsedilapidation. Stress and anxiety are far more severe and widespread inamong the modern generation than they were among our forefathersthan in their forefathers. The reasons for this crisis cancould be attributed to poor working conditions and the worldwide financial crisis. Several initiatives could be taken to address this problem. One of the primary reasons for the widespreadextensive stress-related problems in the modern era is the demanding and highly competitive work environment. Constant work pressure, deadlines, and job insecurity lead to longer working hourslengthier office hours, which leave little or no family or personal time. It disrupts our relationships, social life, and sleep patternspattern, and fosters unhealthy eatingdiet habits and sedentary lifestyles. For instance, with the ever-increasing working hours, employees sleep fewer hours than ever before, and the majority of them do not cook healthy meals at home. The final result is a more stressful life and deteriorating health conditions. Another reason for this horrendous problem is the global economic crisis and rampant inflation. As a result, many people find it extremely difficult to meet their living expensesmeet their expenses and often get trapped in debtloans and debts. Bankruptcy is increasing, and more people are trying to get a second job to support their lifestyle than ever before. The result is more depression and distress, which can even lead to suicidewhich even leads to suicides. As a solution to this social catastrophe, governments should enact laws to restrict working hours and push employers to improve the working environment for their employees. In addition, financial aid to needy people and mentorship and therapy programmes for people already sufferingalready sufferers are needed. Finally and most importantly, we, as individuals, have to be more prudent in our lifestyle choiceschoice, expenses, savings and retirement plans, and spend quality time with our familiesfamily to eliminate stress and tension. To give an example, even after having a busy professional life, people who choose to lead a healthy life tend tooften tend to suffer less from depression, anxiety and stress. So our choices matter. In conclusion, stress is a silent killer and impedes our performance, deteriorates our health and destroys our relationships. It is expected that individuals and governments will work hard to make a stress-free modern world for all.
Why this response received Band 7.0
The response gives a clear, well-developed account of workplace and financial pressures and offers relevant action by governments and individuals. Its strongest feature is the sustained explanation of cause and effect, while the single-block presentation and several strained or overstated expressions weaken polish. The highest priority is to divide the argument into purposeful paragraphs and use more precise, natural phrasing.
IELTS Writing Criteria Scores
Task Response
Both questions are answered directly with well-explained causes and a relevant range of governmental and personal solutions.
Strengthen the solution discussion by explaining more specifically how financial aid, therapy, and individual planning would reduce the identified pressures.
Coherence and Cohesion
Ideas progress logically through causes, effects, and solutions, but presenting the entire response as one paragraph weakens the organisation of its stages.
Separate the introduction, each main cause, the solutions, and the conclusion into clearly focused paragraphs while retaining the effective internal links.
Lexical Resource
The response uses a broad and flexible vocabulary, although some dramatic or awkward choices such as verge of dilapidation and already sufferers reduce precision.
Prefer restrained, idiomatic wording and check collocations and noun forms so that sophisticated vocabulary remains consistently natural and exact.
Grammatical Range and Accuracy
Complex sentences are varied and generally well controlled, with only occasional agreement, number, and phrasing errors that do not impede meaning.
Proofread for singular-plural consistency and article use, particularly in phrases such as sleep pattern, lifestyle choice, and therapy for sufferers.
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IELTS Writing Task 2
Life has become much more stressful compared to our parent’s generation. As a result, stress-related illnesses are increasing around the world. Why is stress such widespread in the modern world? What do you think can be done to overcome the problems caused by stress?
Your response
Write the task yourself, then compare your choices with the annotated response.