Some people think that parents should teach their children how to be healthy and have a balanced diet. Others, however, believe that school is the best place to learn this. Discuss both these views and give your own opinion.
Sample Response
Promoting good health is essential for children's ownchildren towards his own well-being. At home, parents should teach their children about the importance of eating a balanced diet. Children ought to learn a healthy lifestylelearn healthy lifestyle from parents and that would make a healthy nation. However, others believebelieved that school is the best place to learn this. This essay will examine both sides of the argumentarguments.
There is no doubt that parents have great responsibilities in their children's diet and health. First, is to make healthful food choices. Since they are the onesone who provide meals, it is their responsibility to ensure these meals are nutritious and healthy. Secondly, parents should encourage their children to avoid junk foodfoods and sugary snacks during the day. They should emphasiseGiving emphasis on what foods to be avoided and serving a variety of foods with fruits and vegetables every day.
However, a school has a lot to offer that covers many aspects of promoting a healthy lifestyle and balanced diet. Health education has always been a part of school curriculum which helps children understandhelped children understanding the importance of having a healthy diet and developing healthy eating habits. Children are exposed to a variety of health themes in school such as disease prevention, physical activity and nutrition to encourage healthy behaviourto raise healthy behaviours. In addition, they have useful tools and resources offered as part of the lesson. For example, kitchen and food garden lessons at school that connectconnects students to the healthy lifestyle. Moreover, a school has broad health topics including nutrition guidelines, physical fitness that elicits health promotion.
On balance, having consideredconsidering both sides of the issues, although parents have the ultimate responsibility to their children about healthcare and balanced diet, I would agree that school is the best place to learn healthy habits and proper diet. Parents should continue encouraging their youngstersyoungster to make healthy food choices while school teaches them howteaches them everything how to improve children's health.
Why this response received Band 6.5
The essay addresses both views and reaches a clear opinion that schools are the best setting while parents retain an important supporting role. The discussion contains relevant examples, especially school gardens and family meal choices, but ideas sometimes become lists and grammar errors recur in fragments, agreement and clause control. Develop one mechanism per paragraph and proofread sentence completeness and subject-verb agreement.
IELTS Writing Criteria Scores
Task Response
Both views are developed and a clear balanced opinion is sustained, though some supporting points overlap.
Explain why schools' resources make them more effective than parents, rather than only listing resources.
Coherence and Cohesion
Paragraphing and overall progression are clear, with some list-like development and mechanical linking.
Build each body paragraph around one comparative reason.
Lexical Resource
Relevant health and education vocabulary is used, despite several awkward collocations and word forms.
Use natural phrases such as healthy diet, health education and practical lessons.
Grammatical Range and Accuracy
A range of structures conveys meaning, but fragments and agreement errors occur regularly.
Ensure every sentence has a finite verb and check relative-clause agreement.
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IELTS Writing Task 2
Some people think that parents should teach their children how to be healthy and have a balanced diet. Others, however, believe that school is the best place to learn this. Discuss both these views and give your own opinion.
Your response
Write the task yourself, then compare your choices with the annotated response.