The table below gives information on internet use in six categories by age group.
Sample Response
The given data shows the internet usages activity of seven age groups. As is presented in the data, teenagers mostly play games and get news while the mid-aged people mostly search and purchase products. According to the presentation, teenagers mostly play online games, look for news, download, and purchase products when they are online. They rarely search for people. With the increase of age internet users do product search mostly and their second most activity online involves getting news and buying products. Among the 40 to 60 years old internet users, the most common activity is product purchasing. With the increase of age, the download activity decreases and searching for people activity increases. For instance, only 5% activity of teenagers involves searching for people while this rate increases to around 30% when they get older. On the other hand, 52% of teenagers’ internet activities involve downloading from the internet while this rate decreases to less than 30% over time. Similarly, the online game playing is most popular among teenagers and this percentage decreases significantly among the grownup people. In summary, teenagers mostly download and play games online while matured people mostly search and purchase products online. Getting news and buying products are done by all age group and aged people mostly search for other people online.
IELTS Writing Correction
- 1. Noun form Original: internet usages activity Suggested revision: internet activities Why it matters: Use a simple plural noun phrase.
- 2. Overview precision Original: teenagers mostly play games and get news Suggested revision: teenagers mainly play games, get news and download content Why it matters: Downloads are also a major teenage category at 52%.
- 3. Word choice Original: mid Suggested revision: middle Why it matters: Use the standard adjective “middle-aged”.
- 4. Category names Original: search and purchase products Suggested revision: do product research and buy products Why it matters: The table separates “Product research” from “Buying a product”.
- 5. Teen product research Original: purchase products when they are online Suggested revision: buy products online Why it matters: Teenagers buy products at 43%, but product research is 0%, so avoid combining the two.
- 6. Add figure Original: They rarely search for people Suggested revision: Only 5% search for people Why it matters: A figure would make this detail stronger.
- 7. Natural transition Original: With the increase of age internet users do product search mostly Suggested revision: As age increases, product research becomes the dominant activity Why it matters: This improves cohesion and grammar.
- 8. Awkward phrase Original: their second most activity online involves Suggested revision: their next most common activities are Why it matters: Use a natural ranking phrase.
- 9. Age range wording Original: Among the 40 to 60 years old internet users Suggested revision: Among internet users in their 40s to 60s Why it matters: This matches the table headings more naturally.
- 10. Wrong category Original: purchasing Suggested revision: research Why it matters: The highest category for 40s-60s is product research, not buying a product.
- 11. Less repetitive transition Original: With the increase of age Suggested revision: As users get older Why it matters: This avoids repeating the same phrase.
- 12. Percentage phrase Original: only 5% activity Suggested revision: only 5% of teenagers’ activity Why it matters: Use “of” after the percentage.
Suggested Rewrites
- internet usages activity internet activities
- teenagers mostly play games and get news teenagers mainly play games, get news and download content
- mid middle
- search and purchase products do product research and buy products
- purchase products when they are online buy products online
- They rarely search for people Only 5% search for people
Why this response received Band 6.0
The response captures several broad age-related trends, particularly the decline in gaming and downloading and the greater emphasis on product research among adults. However, some table details are misstated or overlooked, and the dense single paragraph contains repetitive and awkward language, so the priority is to organise the data by age pattern and support the clearest contrasts with accurate category names and figures.
IELTS Writing Criteria Scores
Task Achievement
The response identifies several useful trends, including high teenage gaming/downloading and higher product research among adults. However, it misses or misstates some table details, such as product research being zero for teens and news being high across all groups.
Use exact category names and select the clearest cross-age contrasts: games/downloads fall with age, product research jumps after the teens, and news remains consistently high.
Coherence and Cohesion
The answer progresses from overview to details, but it is one dense paragraph with repeated “with the increase of age” phrasing.
Separate the overview from two detail paragraphs: younger users and older users.
Lexical Resource
Lexical range is sufficient, but there are awkward phrases such as “internet usages activity” and “matured people”.
Use “internet activities”, “older age groups”, “product research”, and “buying products online”.
Grammatical Range and Accuracy
Grammar errors with noun forms, articles and plural agreement are frequent but generally do not obscure meaning.
Revise plural categories and use “as age increases” or “among older users” for comparisons.
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IELTS Academic Writing Task 1
The table below gives information on internet use in six categories by age group.
Your response
Write the task yourself, then compare your choices with the annotated response.