You have just returned home after living with a family in an English-speaking country for six months. You left a small bag of personal possessions in your room. Write to the family. In your letter: - describe the things you left behind - ask the family to send the items to you - offer to cover the cost
Sample Response
Dear Mrs Beth, I have safely reached home last Tuesday. I want to thank you for the warm hospitality and kindness that you and your family have rendered to me. It felt just like home living with all of you. As you are already aware that I was racing against time and rushing to catch my flight, I left a bag with my laptop, charger and some books in my room. I did not realize it at that time and it only occurred to me halfway through the flight. These books and the laptop are utterly important for my research. Besides, all of my works are saved on my laptop. I will highly appreciate it if you can go through the trouble of sending me the bag with its contents through a courier. Kindly use the FedEx service as they are quick and reliable in my country. The approximate weight of the bag will be around five kilograms, and I would like to bear the cost of the courier. Please provide me with your bank details as I will deposit the amount into your account in advance. I will be very grateful to you for this act of kindness. Thank you once again. Yours Sincerely, Faisal Ahmed
IELTS Writing Correction
- 1. Use simple past Original: have safely reached home last Tuesday Suggested revision: arrived home safely last Tuesday Why it matters: A finished time expression requires the simple past.
- 2. Use hospitality collocation Original: rendered to me Suggested revision: shown me Why it matters: Kindness and hospitality are shown to someone, not rendered to them.
- 3. Clarify the subject Original: It felt just like home living Suggested revision: Living Why it matters: Replacing the opening phrase makes Living with all of you felt just like home grammatical and direct.
- 4. Remove extra connector Original: As you are already aware that Suggested revision: As you are already aware, Why it matters: As and that cannot introduce the same subordinate structure.
- 5. Use concise reason Original: racing against time Suggested revision: in a hurry Why it matters: The simpler phrase suits this friendly explanation.
- 6. Use natural intensifier Original: utterly Suggested revision: extremely Why it matters: Extremely is the natural intensifier with important.
- 7. Use uncountable work Original: works Suggested revision: work Why it matters: Work is uncountable when referring collectively to research files.
- 8. Use conditional courtesy Original: I will highly appreciate it Suggested revision: I would greatly appreciate it Why it matters: Would is the standard polite form for making a request.
- 9. Use request collocation Original: go through the trouble Suggested revision: take the trouble Why it matters: Take the trouble is the standard expression.
- 10. Use delivery preposition Original: through a courier Suggested revision: by courier Why it matters: By courier is the standard method phrase.
- 11. Match company pronoun Original: as they are quick Suggested revision: as it is quick Why it matters: FedEx is a singular company name and takes it.
- 12. State estimate directly Original: The approximate weight of the bag will be Suggested revision: The bag weighs approximately Why it matters: The direct verb form is more concise and natural.
Suggested Rewrites
- have safely reached home last Tuesday arrived home safely last Tuesday
- rendered to me shown me
- It felt just like home living Living
- As you are already aware that As you are already aware,
- racing against time in a hurry
- utterly extremely
Why this response received Band 7.0
The letter fully explains what was left, why the items matter, how they should be sent, and how the writer will pay, while retaining a grateful and respectful tone. Its main limitation is recurring awkward collocation and grammar, including the opening tense and the request construction. Prioritise natural personal-letter phrasing and accurate tense control, then organise thanks, item details, and delivery arrangements into short paragraphs.
IELTS Writing Criteria Scores
Task Achievement
All three bullet points are fully developed with precise item details, a clear courier request, and a practical offer to transfer the delivery cost.
Add the recipient's delivery deadline or confirm the writer's postal address to make the arrangement completely actionable.
Coherence and Cohesion
The letter follows a clear sequence from thanks to the forgotten items, their importance, and the delivery and payment plan, though paragraphing is limited.
Separate the appreciation, description of the bag, and courier arrangements into three short body paragraphs.
Lexical Resource
Vocabulary is sufficiently varied for the situation, but expressions such as "rendered to me," "all of my works," and "go through the trouble" are awkward.
Prefer natural phrases such as "shown me," "all my work," and "take the trouble to send the bag."
Grammatical Range and Accuracy
A range of sentence types communicates the message clearly, while tense choice, clause structure, and pronoun agreement contain recurring errors.
Use forms such as "I arrived home safely last Tuesday," "As you know," and "FedEx is quick and reliable."
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IELTS General Training Writing Task 1
You have just returned home after living with a family in an English-speaking country for six months. You left a small bag of personal possessions in your room. Write to the family. In your letter:
- describe the things you left behind
- ask the family to send the items to you
- offer to cover the cost
Your response
Write the task yourself, then compare your choices with the annotated response.