Some people say that the Internet is making the world smaller by bringing people together. To what extent do you agree that the internet is making it easier for people to communicate with one another?
Sample Response
In today’s modernized era nobody has sufficient time to write letters to their loved ones. Moreover it also takes longer to send or receive any information. But the Internet is the easiest way to send messages to our loved ones. Communication can be either in the form of e-mail or through text messages sent via internet to mobile phones. We can send and receive messages straight way.
To conclude, I would like to say that the Internet is one of the most modernized and most successful tools, not only for communication, even to get most relevant information regarding every field in a very short period of time.
IELTS Writing Correction
- 1. Use natural modifier Original: modernized Suggested revision: digital Why it matters: “Digital era” is the natural expression for the present period of internet-based communication.
- 2. Add introductory comma Original: era nobody Suggested revision: era, nobody Why it matters: A comma is needed after the introductory prepositional phrase.
- 3. Remove redundant linker Original: Moreover it also Suggested revision: Moreover, it Why it matters: “Moreover” and “also” duplicate the same additive function, and the connector needs a following comma.
- 4. Use uncountable noun naturally Original: any information Suggested revision: information Why it matters: The uncountable noun is clearer here without the unnecessary determiner “any.”
- 5. Avoid unsupported superlative Original: the easiest way Suggested revision: an easy way Why it matters: The comparative claim is clearer without asserting that no other method is equally easy.
- 6. Correct fixed expression Original: way Suggested revision: away Why it matters: The idiom meaning “immediately” is “straight away.”
- 7. Sentence rewrite Original: Communication can be either in the form of e-mail or through text messages sent via internet to mobile phones. Suggested revision: Communication can take the form of either email or text messages sent over the internet to mobile phones. Why it matters: This revision restores a parallel either-or structure and adds the required article before “internet.”
- 8. Sentence rewrite Original: To conclude, I would like to say that the Internet is one of the most modernized and most successful tools, not only for communication, even to get most relevant information regarding every field in a very short period of time. Suggested revision: To conclude, I would say that the Internet is one of the most advanced and useful tools, not only for communication but also for obtaining relevant information about any field very quickly. Why it matters: This revision corrects the correlative structure and replaces several unnatural collocations while preserving the original claim.
- 9. Improve idea sequence Suggested revision: Move directly from the delay of traditional communication to the Internet examples, and combine the repeated references to sending messages. Why it matters: The paragraph repeats the same communication point instead of progressing efficiently from the problem to the online alternatives.
Suggested Rewrites
- modernized digital
- era nobody era, nobody
- Moreover it also Moreover, it
- any information information
- the easiest way an easy way
- way away
Why this response received Band 5.0
The response communicates a relevant basic idea and gives a clear general view that online communication is fast and convenient. However, at only 107 words, it is severely underlength and provides almost no developed argument, evidence, or sustained discussion of how the Internet brings people together. The highest-priority improvement is to build a full essay with a clear position, two developed reasons, and specific supporting examples.
IELTS Writing Criteria Scores
Task Response
The response gives a relevant viewpoint but addresses the task only minimally and leaves its single main idea almost entirely undeveloped.
Write at least 250 words and develop two distinct reasons showing how Internet communication connects people, supported by specific examples.
Coherence and Cohesion
The short response has a basic sequence and uses simple linking words, but it lacks developed body paragraphs and sustained progression.
Organise the essay into an introduction, two logically developed body paragraphs, and a concise conclusion with clear referencing between ideas.
Lexical Resource
The vocabulary is adequate for the basic message but is repetitive and includes several awkward or inaccurate expressions.
Use more precise terms for communication and replace phrases such as modernized era and straight way with natural academic wording.
Grammatical Range and Accuracy
Simple meanings are generally clear, but punctuation, article use, and complex linking constructions contain noticeable errors.
Practise punctuating introductory connectors and constructing paired forms such as not only ... but also accurately.
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IELTS Writing Task 2
Some people say that the Internet is making the world smaller by bringing people together. To what extent do you agree that the internet is making it easier for people to communicate with one another?
Your response
Write the task yourself, then compare your choices with the annotated response.