It is sometimes possible to pay somebody to do things you don't want to do, or don't have time to do, for example, household chores or looking after children. Is this a good way of providing work for others? Should people do these things themselves?
Sample Response
In this modern era, where people are looking for work, it is easy to hire people to do our tasks. While paying others to complete tasks like household chores and childcare may seem convenient, it is not necessarily a beneficial practice. Relying on paid help for routine tasks can lead to financial strain, reduced self-sufficiency, and even ethical concerns regarding labour conditions. I firmly believe that individuals should take responsibility for their own household tasks rather than outsourcing them.
Firstly, hiring domestic workers can become a significant financial burden over time. Many middle-income families struggle to afford professional cleaning services, childcare, or meal preparation, yet they still opt for them due to convenience. However, these expenses can accumulate, reducing savings and financial security. For instance, hiring a full-time nanny or housekeeper can cost thousands of dollars annually, which could instead be invested in education or retirement planning.
Additionally, performing household tasks fosters self-reliance and essential life skills. Relying too much on paid workers may result in people losing basic abilities such as cooking, cleaning, or organizing their living spaces. These tasks, though seemingly mundane, contribute to personal discipline and responsibility. For example, children who grow up in households where everything is done for them may struggle to manage their own homes later in life.
Another concern is the ethical implications of hiring domestic help, particularly in regions where labour laws are weak. Many domestic workers are underpaid, overworked, and lack proper legal protections. Cases of exploitation, unfair wages, and poor working conditions are common, especially in developing countries. Instead of perpetuating an industry that sometimes thrives on inequality, people should take responsibility for their own household duties.
In conclusion, while outsourcing domestic tasks may seem convenient, it is often unnecessary and can lead to financial difficulties, loss of essential skills, and labour exploitation. People should strive to manage their own homes, as doing so promotes independence and financial well-being.
IELTS Writing Correction
- 1. Use concise wording Original: not necessarily a beneficial practice Suggested revision: not necessarily beneficial Why it matters: The adjective expresses the same point more directly without the abstract noun practice.
- 2. Use a direct preposition Original: regarding Suggested revision: about Why it matters: Concerns about is a more direct and natural collocation in this context.
- 3. Clarify the choice Original: opt for them due to convenience Suggested revision: choose them for convenience Why it matters: This wording states the choice more directly while preserving the intended meaning.
- 4. Restore parallel meaning Original: reducing savings and financial security Suggested revision: reducing savings and weakening financial security Why it matters: The added verb prevents reducing from applying incorrectly to financial security.
- 5. Use precise financial terms Original: invested in education or retirement planning Suggested revision: allocated to education or retirement savings Why it matters: Allocated and retirement savings describe the proposed uses of the money more precisely.
- 6. Use a concise noun Original: Relying too much on paid workers Suggested revision: Overreliance on paid workers Why it matters: Overreliance expresses excessive dependence more concisely.
- 7. Choose a natural collocation Original: result in people losing basic abilities Suggested revision: cause people to lose basic skills Why it matters: Basic skills is the more natural term for cooking, cleaning, and organizing.
- 8. Fix number agreement Original: is Suggested revision: involves Why it matters: The revised verb avoids linking the singular concern directly to the plural implications.
- 9. Use parallel list items Original: Cases of exploitation, unfair wages, and poor working conditions Suggested revision: Exploitation, unfair wages, and poor working conditions Why it matters: Removing cases of makes all three items grammatically parallel.
- 10. State the effect precisely Original: an industry that sometimes thrives on inequality Suggested revision: a system that can perpetuate inequality Why it matters: Perpetuate describes the claimed continuation of inequality more precisely than thrives on.
- 11. Sentence rewrite Original: In this modern era, where people are looking for work, it is easy to hire people to do our tasks. Suggested revision: In this modern era, when many people are looking for work, it is easy to hire others to perform household tasks. Why it matters: The rewrite clarifies the time clause and replaces the vague phrase do our tasks.
- 12. Sentence rewrite Original: Many domestic workers are underpaid, overworked, and lack proper legal protections. Suggested revision: Many domestic workers are underpaid and overworked, and they lack proper legal protections. Why it matters: The rewrite makes the coordinated descriptions grammatically parallel.
Suggested Rewrites
- not necessarily a beneficial practice not necessarily beneficial
- regarding about
- opt for them due to convenience choose them for convenience
- reducing savings and financial security reducing savings and weakening financial security
- invested in education or retirement planning allocated to education or retirement savings
- Relying too much on paid workers Overreliance on paid workers
Why this response received Band 8.0
The response is fluent, precisely organised, and develops a persuasive case for self-reliance through financial, practical, and ethical considerations. Its main limitation is task coverage: it argues strongly that people should do these tasks themselves but does not directly evaluate whether paid domestic work is a good way to provide employment for others. The priority is to address that employment question explicitly and weigh its benefits against the exploitation risk before reaching the conclusion.
IELTS Writing Criteria Scores
Task Response
The position on doing household tasks personally is clear and extensively supported, but the separate question about whether this arrangement provides worthwhile work for others is only indirectly addressed through labour exploitation.
Discuss the employment value of paid domestic work directly, including fair-income opportunities as well as poor conditions, and integrate that judgement into the final position.
Coherence and Cohesion
The response progresses smoothly through three distinct reasons, with clear paragraphing, effective topic sentences, and cohesive links that rarely draw attention to themselves.
Add a dedicated employment-focused paragraph or integrate that comparison into the ethics paragraph so the organisation mirrors both questions in the task.
Lexical Resource
Vocabulary is varied, precise, and natural across financial, personal-development, and labour-rights topics, with only slight repetition of household tasks and responsibility.
Refine the already strong range by varying repeated key phrases only where the alternative remains equally precise and natural.
Grammatical Range and Accuracy
A wide range of complex structures is used accurately and flexibly, with consistently clear sentence boundaries and only rare minor imperfections.
Maintain this control while adding more nuanced concessive structures to compare the legitimate employment benefits with possible exploitation.
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IELTS Writing Task 2
It is sometimes possible to pay somebody to do things you don't want to do, or don't have time to do, for example, household chores or looking after children. Is this a good way of providing work for others? Should people do these things themselves?
Your response
Write the task yourself, then compare your choices with the annotated response.