Some people believe that advertising has a strong effect on a person’s decision-making process. Others feel that it has little or no real impact. Discuss both views and give your own opinion.
Sample Response
Advertising is ubiquitous in modern society, but there are differing opinions on whether it has a significant impact on our decision-making process or not. While some people believe that advertising strongly influences our purchasing decisions, others tend to disagree. Personally, I think that advertising has little or no impact on our choices.
One argument in favour of advertising's influence is that it can create a desire for products or services that we may or may not necessarily need. Adverts often use persuasive language, imagery and beautiful models to create a sense of urgency or need for the product, even when it is not essential or real. For example, an advertisement for a facial cream can create a desire for the product, even if it fails to keep the promise of making our skin as beautiful as the model who was used in it.
On the contrary, another group of people argue that these effects are often short-lived. People may forget about the products they saw in advertisements soon after seeing them, or they may not be as interested in them once they have had more time to consider their needs and priorities. In the case of a luxury car, the person may realize that they do not have the money or the need for such a vehicle once they have had time to consider their options. These days, people tend to make rational decisions based on their needs and budget. For instance, a person who needs to buy a new air-conditioner will look for the features, price, and technology of the product before making a purchase, regardless of how much it is advertised. People tend to prioritize their needs over their wants, and advertising cannot change that.
In my opinion, modern people have become more sceptical of advertising and are often aware of the tactics used to persuade them to buy a product. This is why advertisements, these days, can not influence their purchasing decisions.
In conclusion, advertising may have some impact on our decision-making process, but it is often short-lived, and people tend to make rational decisions based on their requirements and budget. We should let advertising inform us, and not force us to buy something.
IELTS Writing Correction
- 1. Remove redundant ending Original: process or not Suggested revision: process Why it matters: The word 'whether' already expresses the alternatives, so 'or not' is unnecessary here.
- 2. State the view precisely Original: others tend to disagree Suggested revision: others believe it has little impact Why it matters: This wording identifies the opposing view more precisely than the vague verb 'disagree'.
- 3. Remove stacked hedging Original: may or may not necessarily need Suggested revision: may not necessarily need Why it matters: Using both 'may or may not' and 'necessarily' creates avoidable repetition.
- 4. Clarify the paired nouns Original: need Suggested revision: desire Why it matters: A product can create urgency or desire, whereas 'a sense of need' is less natural in this pairing.
- 5. Use natural collocation Original: keep the promise Suggested revision: fulfil its promise Why it matters: Products and advertisements are more naturally said to fulfil a promise than to keep one.
- 6. Use concise wording Original: model who was used in it Suggested revision: model featured in it Why it matters: 'Featured' expresses the intended role more naturally and concisely.
- 7. Use accurate contrast Original: On the contrary Suggested revision: By contrast Why it matters: The paragraph presents an alternative view rather than directly refuting the preceding statement.
- 8. Strengthen correlative form Original: the money or the need Suggested revision: either the money or the need Why it matters: Adding 'either' makes the paired alternatives grammatically clearer.
- 9. Choose a precise verb Original: look for the features, price, and technology of the product Suggested revision: compare the product's features, price, and technology Why it matters: Buyers compare these attributes rather than simply look for them.
- 10. Use natural adverb Original: much Suggested revision: heavily Why it matters: 'Heavily advertised' is the natural expression for the extent of advertising.
- 11. Use idiomatic phrasing Original: modern people Suggested revision: people today Why it matters: 'People today' is a more natural way to refer to people in the present era.
- 12. Simplify the time phrase Original: advertisements, these days, can not Suggested revision: advertisements today cannot Why it matters: The revision removes unnecessary interruption and uses a more concise time expression.
Suggested Rewrites
- process or not process
- others tend to disagree others believe it has little impact
- may or may not necessarily need may not necessarily need
- need desire
- keep the promise fulfil its promise
- model who was used in it model featured in it
Why this response received Band 8.0
The response is strongest in its clear, sustained position and its relevant examples, which make both perspectives easy to follow. Its main limitation is that the case for advertising's influence is less fully developed than the counterargument, while a few claims are overly absolute. The highest-priority improvement is to deepen the first perspective with a second mechanism or example and then qualify the final judgement more precisely.
IELTS Writing Criteria Scores
Task Response
Both views and a clear opinion are addressed with relevant explanation, although the supporting side receives less development and the position becomes slightly more qualified in the conclusion.
Develop the pro-advertising view as fully as the opposing view and state the qualified position consistently throughout.
Coherence and Cohesion
Ideas progress logically through well-focused paragraphs, with cohesive devices used clearly and unobtrusively apart from minor repetition.
Integrate the separate opinion paragraph more closely with the preceding argument to reduce repetition and sharpen progression.
Lexical Resource
A broad and generally precise vocabulary supports the argument, with only occasional awkward choices such as describing a need as not real.
Replace slightly imprecise or absolute wording with more exact collocations and appropriately qualified claims.
Grammatical Range and Accuracy
A wide range of sentence structures is handled accurately, and the few minor slips do not impede communication.
Refine punctuation and parallel phrasing in longer sentences to make an already strong level of control more consistent.
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IELTS Writing Task 2
Some people believe that advertising has a strong effect on a person’s decision-making process. Others feel that it has little or no real impact. Discuss both views and give your own opinion.
Your response
Write the task yourself, then compare your choices with the annotated response.