The maps below show a beachfront area in Australia in 1950 and today.
Sample Response
They yielded two maps that demonstrate a beachfront area in 1950 and presently in Australia.
Overall, the major changes are surrounding the beach where clubs and restaurants open now and the new road is made.
In 1950, a car parking road was connected to city road and alongside that road was round shape play ground and dining tables. There was two same dimensions pool, and one was on the east side while another was on the west side of the beach. The pool was 25 meters long. Additionally, one pavilion was between car parking and dining tables, a small lighthouse beside the east pool.
Currently, we can see dramatic changes, primarily in the road. Now the road is not ending at car parking. It developed to the lighthouse, and it’s in u shape. No change for dining tables and pavilion; however, small car parking takes the place of the playground. Another car park area is increased on the southwest side, pool dimensions double than 1950, and open restaurants. One new advancement surf club is the backside of 50m pool, and one is the 25m pool backside.
IELTS Writing Correction
- 1. Fix the opening subject Original: They yielded two maps Suggested revision: The two maps Why it matters: The maps are the subject of the description and were not yielded by an unspecified actor.
- 2. Use the mapped time Original: presently in Australia Suggested revision: in Australia today Why it matters: “Today” directly matches the time label in the task.
- 3. Use present perfect Original: major changes are surrounding the beach Suggested revision: major changes have occurred around the beach Why it matters: Present perfect correctly describes changes from 1950 to today.
- 4. Correct the new facilities Original: clubs and restaurants open now Suggested revision: two surf clubs and a restaurant have opened Why it matters: The current map shows two surf clubs and one restaurant.
- 5. Describe the road change Original: the new road is made Suggested revision: the road has been extended Why it matters: The road existed in 1950 and has since been extended around the eastern side.
- 6. Name the road clearly Original: a car parking road Suggested revision: a road to the car park Why it matters: This phrase accurately describes the road’s connection to the parking area.
- 7. Add the article Original: connected to city road Suggested revision: connected to the city road Why it matters: The specific road shown on the map requires the definite article.
- 8. Correct the noun phrase Original: round shape play ground Suggested revision: round playground Why it matters: “Playground” is one word and “round” functions directly as its modifier.
- 9. Fix number agreement Original: There was two same dimensions pool Suggested revision: There were two pools of the same size Why it matters: The plural subject requires “were” and a plural count noun.
- 10. Use paired reference Original: while another was on the west side Suggested revision: while the other was on the west side Why it matters: With two pools, “one” should be paired with “the other.”
- 11. Refer to both pools Original: The pool Suggested revision: Both pools Why it matters: The 1950 map shows two pools with the same labelled length.
- 12. Match the plural subject Original: was 25 meters long Suggested revision: were 25 metres long Why it matters: The verb must agree with the revised plural subject.
Suggested Rewrites
- They yielded two maps The two maps
- presently in Australia in Australia today
- major changes are surrounding the beach major changes have occurred around the beach
- clubs and restaurants open now two surf clubs and a restaurant have opened
- the new road is made the road has been extended
- a car parking road a road to the car park
Why this response received Band 5.5
The response is clearly divided by time period and covers many important physical changes, including the extended road, added parking, restaurant, surf clubs, and enlarged pool. The overview is too limited, and several locations or changes are expressed inaccurately or unclearly because grammar and word choice are unstable. The priority is to give a fuller overview and describe each change with precise map language and controlled sentences.
IELTS Writing Criteria Scores
Task Achievement
The response identifies most major additions and alterations, but the overview is narrow and some locations and developments are imprecisely described.
Summarize the overall expansion of facilities and access, then locate each new feature accurately relative to the beach and lighthouse.
Coherence and Cohesion
Organizing the description into 1950 and current sections creates clear overall progression, although some linking and sentence sequencing are mechanical.
Group unchanged features separately from additions and extensions so each paragraph develops one clear comparison.
Lexical Resource
Vocabulary is adequate for the map and includes relevant terms, but awkward choices such as open restaurants and backside reduce naturalness and precision.
Use precise map phrases such as was built, was enlarged, remained unchanged, and to the west or east of.
Grammatical Range and Accuracy
A mixture of sentence forms is attempted, but frequent agreement, article, comparison, and fragment errors reduce control.
Review plural agreement and comparative structures, and ensure every sentence contains a complete subject and finite verb.
Write this task while it is fresh
Try the same task now. It helps you remember the feedback and write better next time.
IELTS Academic Writing Task 1
The maps below show a beachfront area in Australia in 1950 and today.
Your response
Write the task yourself, then compare your choices with the annotated response.