The graphs below show the post-school qualifications held by Canadians in the age groups 25 to 35 and 45 to 55.
Sample Response
These two pie charts show the differences between two groups of Canadians (25 to 35 and 45 to 55 year olds) in terms of their post-school qualifications.
The first point to note is the huge increase in the number of people with qualifications. The younger group is more than two times bigger than the older group (515,600 compared to 213,400).
Comparing the two groups, Humanities and Nursing have experienced an increase in popularity with older graduates; Nursing rose by 4%. However, the biggest gain was made by engineering, which increased from 9% to 19% of the whole.
Some subjects were more popular with the younger age group. The biggest loss in graduate numbers were to Science, Maths and Computers which, as a group, have decreased by 8%. Administration has declined by 4%.
To sum up, the graphs show a more than twofold increase in the number of graduates. The most noticeable change in subject percentages is the increase in the number of engineering graduates.
IELTS Writing Correction
- 1. Hyphenate age ranges Original: (25 to 35 and 45 to 55 year olds) Suggested revision: (25- to 35-year-olds and 45- to 55-year-olds) Why it matters: Compound age expressions used as nouns require hyphens.
- 2. Use a precise comparison Original: two times bigger Suggested revision: twice as large Why it matters: “Twice as large” expresses this numerical comparison more precisely.
- 3. Avoid implying a trend Original: have experienced an increase in popularity with older graduates Suggested revision: were more common among older degree holders Why it matters: The charts compare two age groups at one point rather than showing popularity changing over time.
- 4. Use percentage points Original: rose by 4% Suggested revision: was four percentage points higher Why it matters: Nursing accounts for 11% versus 7%, a difference of four percentage points.
- 5. Use percentage points Original: has declined by 4% Suggested revision: was four percentage points lower Why it matters: Administration represents 15% among the older group and 19% among the younger group.
- 6. Use a concise reporting verb Original: show the differences between Suggested revision: compare Why it matters: “Compare” conveys the relationship between the two charts more directly.
- 7. Remove wordiness Original: in terms of their Suggested revision: in their Why it matters: The shorter phrase preserves the meaning and improves concision.
- 8. Use the chart terminology Original: people with qualifications Suggested revision: degree holders Why it matters: The visual specifically reports Canadians who hold a degree.
- 9. Use consistent capitalization Original: Humanities and Nursing Suggested revision: humanities and nursing Why it matters: General fields of study are normally lowercased in running prose.
- 10. Signal the contrast Original: Some subjects Suggested revision: By contrast, some fields Why it matters: A contrast marker makes the shift from older to younger graduates explicit.
- 11. Avoid implying preference Original: more popular with Suggested revision: more common among Why it matters: The charts show proportions of qualifications rather than personal popularity.
- 12. Avoid repetition Original: younger age group Suggested revision: younger group Why it matters: “Age” is already clear from the chart comparison and can be omitted.
Suggested Rewrites
- (25 to 35 and 45 to 55 year olds) (25- to 35-year-olds and 45- to 55-year-olds)
- two times bigger twice as large
- have experienced an increase in popularity with older graduates were more common among older degree holders
- rose by 4% was four percentage points higher
- has declined by 4% was four percentage points lower
- show the differences between compare
Why this response received Band 7.0
The response is well organized and accurately selects the largest differences between the two age groups, supported by relevant figures. Its main limitation is that cohort comparisons are sometimes described as increases or losses, which can suggest change over time; the priority is to frame all figures as direct age-group contrasts and add one or two omitted comparisons to make the coverage more balanced.
IELTS Writing Criteria Scores
Task Achievement
A clear overview and accurate figures highlight the total difference and the largest subject-share contrasts, though some wording implies a temporal trend and several categories are omitted.
Describe the data consistently as differences between age groups and include one or two additional significant contrasts, such as MBA or Education.
Coherence and Cohesion
The response progresses logically from introduction and overview to grouped comparisons, with clear paragraphing and generally natural linking.
Make the final summary less repetitive by using it to synthesize the main contrast rather than restating earlier sentences.
Lexical Resource
Vocabulary is varied and mostly precise for comparison, with occasional awkward collocation such as 'the biggest loss in graduate numbers were to.'
Prefer exact comparative phrasing such as 'the share for Science, Maths and Computers was eight percentage points lower in the older group.'
Grammatical Range and Accuracy
A good range of complex structures is used accurately, with only occasional agreement errors that do not impede meaning.
Proofread subject-verb agreement in sentences such as 'The biggest loss ... was' and ensure pronouns agree with their referents.
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IELTS Academic Writing Task 1
The graphs below show the post-school qualifications held by Canadians in the age groups 25 to 35 and 45 to 55.
Your response
Write the task yourself, then compare your choices with the annotated response.