The graphs below show the post-school qualifications held by Canadians in the age groups 25 to 35 and 45 to 55.
Sample Response
These two pie charts show the differences between two groups of Canadians (25 to 35 and 45 to 55 year olds) in terms of their post-school qualifications. The first point to note is the huge increase in the number of people with qualifications. The younger group is more than two times bigger than the older group (515,600 compared to 213,400). Comparing the two groups, Humanities and Nursing have experienced an increase in popularity with older graduates; Nursing rose by 4%. However, the biggest gain was made by engineering, which increased from 9% to 19% of the whole. Some subjects were more popular with the younger age group. The biggest loss in graduate numbers were to Science, Maths and Computers which, as a group, have decreased by 8%. Administration has declined by 4%. To sum up, the graphs show a more than twofold increase in the number of graduates. The most noticeable change in subject percentages is the increase in the number of engineering graduates.
IELTS Writing Correction
- 1. Hyphenate age modifier Original: year olds Suggested revision: year-olds Why it matters: The compound noun for people in an age range should be hyphenated.
- 2. Use accurate comparison Original: more than two times bigger than Suggested revision: more than twice as large as Why it matters: “Twice as large as” expresses the numerical comparison clearly and accurately.
- 3. Compare the cohorts Original: have experienced an increase in popularity with older graduates Suggested revision: accounted for larger shares among older graduates Why it matters: The charts compare separate age groups rather than showing a change over time.
- 4. Use percentage points Original: Nursing rose by 4% Suggested revision: Nursing was 4 percentage points higher among older graduates Why it matters: Nursing represents 11% of the older group and 7% of the younger group, a four-point difference.
- 5. Describe a difference Original: the biggest gain was made by engineering Suggested revision: the largest difference was in engineering Why it matters: The visual compares two cohorts and does not show engineering changing over time.
- 6. State both cohort shares Original: increased from 9% to 19% of the whole Suggested revision: accounted for 9% of the younger group and 19% of the older group Why it matters: This wording identifies which cohort each engineering percentage belongs to.
- 7. Avoid temporal change Original: has declined by 4% Suggested revision: was 4 percentage points lower among older graduates Why it matters: Administration accounts for 19% of younger graduates and 15% of older graduates.
- 8. Describe the cohort gap Original: change in subject percentages is the increase in the number of engineering graduates Suggested revision: difference in subject shares is the higher proportion of engineering graduates among older graduates Why it matters: The ten-point engineering gap is a difference between cohorts, not evidence of an increase in graduate numbers.
- 9. Use a direct overview Original: These two pie charts show the differences between Suggested revision: The two pie charts compare Why it matters: “Compare” states the visual's function more directly and concisely.
- 10. Specify the chart dimension Original: in terms of their post-school qualifications Suggested revision: by field of post-school qualification Why it matters: The slices represent fields of study rather than qualifications in general.
- 11. Use precise cohort term Original: group Suggested revision: cohort Why it matters: “Cohort” distinguishes the age-based group more precisely.
- 12. Use sentence case Original: Humanities and Nursing Suggested revision: humanities and nursing Why it matters: Common field names do not require capitals within a sentence.
Suggested Rewrites
- year olds year-olds
- more than two times bigger than more than twice as large as
- have experienced an increase in popularity with older graduates accounted for larger shares among older graduates
- Nursing rose by 4% Nursing was 4 percentage points higher among older graduates
- the biggest gain was made by engineering the largest difference was in engineering
- increased from 9% to 19% of the whole accounted for 9% of the younger group and 19% of the older group
Why this response received Band 7.0
The response makes clear comparisons between the two age groups and highlights the striking difference in total degree holders and the reversal in engineering and science-related shares. Its main weakness is treating the charts as changes over time, using language such as increased and declined, and it omits several subject categories. Prioritise neutral cross-group comparisons and include the other major proportions, especially social science and arts and education.
IELTS Writing Criteria Scores
Task Achievement
The report identifies the main difference in group totals and several notable subject contrasts, but change-over-time wording is unsuitable for static age-group data and some categories are omitted.
Compare the age groups directly using higher and lower shares, and cover the major stable categories as well as the largest contrasts.
Coherence and Cohesion
Ideas progress logically from overall totals to subject comparisons and a concluding summary, although the single-paragraph format limits structural clarity.
Use a separate overview and group related subject comparisons into focused detail paragraphs to make the information hierarchy clearer.
Lexical Resource
The response has sufficient range for comparing proportions and fields of study, but gain, loss, increased, and declined create misleading temporal implications.
Replace change vocabulary with precise comparative forms such as accounted for a larger share or was more prevalent among the older group.
Grammatical Range and Accuracy
Sentence structures are varied and mostly accurate, with occasional agreement and reference problems such as the mismatch between loss and were.
Check subject-verb agreement in complex noun phrases and ensure relative clauses refer clearly to percentages rather than graduate numbers.
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IELTS Academic Writing Task 1
The graphs below show the post-school qualifications held by Canadians in the age groups 25 to 35 and 45 to 55.
Your response
Write the task yourself, then compare your choices with the annotated response.