Chorleywood is a village near London whose population has increased steadily since the middle of the nineteenth century. The map shows the development of the village.
Sample Response
The map shows the growth of a village called Chorleywood between 1868 and 1994.
It is clear that the village grew as the transport infrastructure was improved. Four periods of development are shown on the map, and each of the populated areas is near to the main roads, the railway or the motorway.
From 1868 to 1883, Chorleywood covered a small area next to one of the main roads. Chorleywood Park and Golf Course is now located next to this original village area. The village grew along the main road to the south between 1883 and 1922, and in 1909 a railway line was built crossing this area from west to east. Chorleywood station is in this part of the village.
The expansion of Chorleywood continued to the east and west alongside the railway line until 1970. At that time, a motorway was built to the east of the village, and from 1970 to 1994, further development of the village took place around motorway intersections with the railway and one of the main roads.
IELTS Writing Correction
- 1. Make the introduction concise Original: a village called Chorleywood Suggested revision: Chorleywood Why it matters: The proper name alone conveys the same meaning more concisely.
- 2. Avoid unsupported causality Original: grew as the transport infrastructure was improved Suggested revision: expanded alongside improvements to the transport infrastructure Why it matters: The map shows a close spatial and chronological relationship but does not directly prove causation.
- 3. Describe mapped development Original: populated Suggested revision: developed Why it matters: The shaded areas represent village development rather than direct population measurements.
- 4. Use concise wording Original: near to Suggested revision: near Why it matters: Near expresses this spatial relationship without the extra preposition.
- 5. Avoid an unsupported timeframe Original: now located Suggested revision: located Why it matters: The map ends in 1994 and does not establish the park's status at the present time.
- 6. Fix the participle phrase Original: crossing Suggested revision: across Why it matters: Across correctly expresses the railway's route through the developed area.
- 7. Use the precise date Original: At that time Suggested revision: In 1970 Why it matters: Naming the date directly makes the chronological transition more precise.
- 8. Add the possessive form Original: around motorway intersections Suggested revision: around the motorway's intersections Why it matters: The intersections belong to the specific motorway shown on the map.
- 9. Sharpen the overview Suggested revision: Compare the limited early settlement with the much wider development in the later periods. Why it matters: This would add a clear overall comparison of the scale of change across the four periods.
- 10. Highlight the largest expansion Suggested revision: State that the 1970–1994 development was the most extensive and was concentrated near both motorway junctions. Why it matters: This is a prominent final-stage feature visible on the map that deserves explicit emphasis.
Suggested Rewrites
- a village called Chorleywood Chorleywood
- grew as the transport infrastructure was improved expanded alongside improvements to the transport infrastructure
- populated developed
- near to near
- now located located
- crossing across
Why this response received Band 9.0
The response is highly effective: it presents a precise overview linking expansion to transport development, then selects and sequences the four growth periods accurately. Its only meaningful limitation is that the descriptions could make the relative scale of the later development areas slightly more explicit. The best refinement is to add one concise comparison of how extensive the post-1922 expansion became.
IELTS Writing Criteria Scores
Task Achievement
The response fully and accurately summarizes the village's development, with a clear overview and well-selected spatial and chronological details.
As a refinement, add one brief comparison showing that the later expansion covered substantially more land than the original settlement.
Coherence and Cohesion
The information is organized with effortless chronological progression, clear paragraph roles, and cohesive links that do not distract.
Maintain this concise progression while ensuring any added comparison remains integrated with the relevant development period.
Lexical Resource
Vocabulary is consistently precise and flexible, particularly for spatial relationships, infrastructure, and patterns of expansion.
Continue using this level of precision, perhaps varying 'village' once where the reference remains completely clear.
Grammatical Range and Accuracy
A wide range of sentence structures is used with full control and natural punctuation throughout.
Preserve this accuracy when adding denser comparative clauses or further spatial detail.
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IELTS Academic Writing Task 1
Chorleywood is a village near London whose population has increased steadily since the middle of the nineteenth century. The map shows the development of the village.
Your response
Write the task yourself, then compare your choices with the annotated response.