The plans show how a coastal land has developed into a coastal park
Sample Response
The maps describe the transformation of a coastal land into a park.
Overall, the land in front of the cliff has been upgraded with several facilities for park, while the beach behind now has easier access.
Before development, there were farm buildings on the side road, in the centre of the coastal land. To the left of these constructions were unused land and sea animals’ shelters, whereas the other side was agricultural land. This area faced the cliff, right in front of the beach and sea.
The place has been converted into a park, and located on the side road at present is a car park. A footpath was built from the west to the east, surrounding a new lake on the west and woods on the east. Trees were grown along the path to provide more shade, and a new coffee shop was installed behind the car park. The cliff in the front now has steps to allow more visitors to the beach.
IELTS Writing Correction
- 1. Fix noun phrase Original: facilities for park Suggested revision: park facilities Why it matters: The noun 'park' should modify 'facilities' directly.
- 2. Clarify location Original: the beach behind Suggested revision: the beach beyond the cliffs Why it matters: The beach lies beyond the cliffs rather than simply 'behind' them.
- 3. Match map label Original: sea animals’ shelters Suggested revision: an area for animals Why it matters: The original map labels an animal area and does not identify sea-animal shelters.
- 4. Name the location Original: the other side Suggested revision: the land to the right Why it matters: A precise spatial reference makes the map comparison easier to follow.
- 5. Use precise relation Original: faced the cliff Suggested revision: bordered the cliffs Why it matters: The land directly adjoined the line of cliffs rather than merely facing it.
- 6. Use natural verb Original: installed Suggested revision: built Why it matters: A café is built rather than installed.
- 7. Correct map feature Original: The cliff in the front Suggested revision: The cliffs along the southern edge Why it matters: The visual shows a continuous line of cliffs along the coastal land's southern edge.
- 8. Avoid unsupported claim Original: to allow more visitors to the beach Suggested revision: to provide access to the beach Why it matters: The steps create access, but the map does not show an increase in visitor numbers.
- 9. Use compass direction Original: the land in front of the cliff Suggested revision: the land north of the cliffs Why it matters: The map's compass shows that the developed land lies north of the cliffs.
- 10. Use precise change verb Original: has been upgraded Suggested revision: was redeveloped Why it matters: 'Redeveloped' describes the substantial land-use changes more precisely.
- 11. Clarify road access Original: farm buildings on the side road Suggested revision: farm buildings reached by a short access road Why it matters: The original buildings sat at the end of a short road branching from the main road.
- 12. Clarify relative position Original: , right in front of the beach and sea Suggested revision: , immediately north of the beach and sea Why it matters: The compass provides a more exact way to express this spatial relationship.
Suggested Rewrites
- facilities for park park facilities
- the beach behind the beach beyond the cliffs
- sea animals’ shelters an area for animals
- the other side the land to the right
- faced the cliff bordered the cliffs
- installed built
Why this response received Band 7.0
The response is strongest in its clear before-and-after organization and its selection of most major changes, making the transformation easy to follow. Its main limitation is imprecise wording about some locations and features, including the animal area and the café. The highest priority is to describe each mapped feature with exact spatial language and more natural collocations so that the account is consistently accurate and fluent.
IELTS Writing Criteria Scores
Task Achievement
A clear overview and most major developments are presented accurately, though a few features and spatial relationships are described imprecisely.
Check every location and label against the maps, especially the animal area, paths, café, and access to the beach.
Coherence and Cohesion
The response progresses logically from an overview to clearly separated descriptions of the land before and after development.
Make comparisons between corresponding old and new features more explicit within the body paragraphs.
Lexical Resource
There is sufficient topic-specific vocabulary, but awkward collocations such as facilities for park and installed a coffee shop reduce precision.
Use natural map-reporting phrases such as park facilities, a café was built, and land formerly used for animals.
Grammatical Range and Accuracy
A range of complex sentence forms is generally controlled, with only occasional article, preposition, and phrasing errors.
Proofread articles and prepositions in phrases describing facilities and relative positions.
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IELTS Academic Writing Task 1
The plans show how a coastal land has developed into a coastal park
Your response
Write the task yourself, then compare your choices with the annotated response.