The pie chart and table below show how water was used worldwide and in four selected countries in 2000.

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This response is estimated at Band 7.0. Can you write a better one?

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Sample Response

1

The pie chart and table compare the proportionwater the proportion of water use worldwide and in four countries in 2000 across three sectorsin terms of three sectors.

2

Overall, agriculture had the largest water use globally as well as in China and Indiain the world including China and India, but New Zealand and Canada were exceptions. Industry was the second and domestic usethe domestic was generally the least.

3

India and China shared broadly similar patterns with the world trend in agriculturalagriculture water use, although India had the highest proportionshowed the most use, at approximately 92%, far exceeding that in the world, at 70%, and China , at 69%. However, of industrialIndustry water use, only the proportion in China followed the same worldwide pattern, matching the global sharebeing the least one, at 22%, compared with India where it was only 3%which lied in between. Domestic water consumption was lowerDomestic water was less than that of industry in the world, China, and India, although the figure for China, at 9%, was slightly higher than that for the world, at 8%China, at 8%, was slightly higher than that for the world, at 7%.

4

The other two countries showed somewhat different patterns. New Zealand recorded its highest proportion of water use in the domestic sectorthe peak of water utilization domestically, at approximately 46%, compared with 44% in agriculture and 10% in industryabout 44% which was used in agriculture and about 10% which was consumed by industry. In Canada, water consumption in industry was the dominant category, at 80%, followed distantly by domestic usefollowed far by that in domestic, at only 12%, with agriculture accounting for the lowest sharewhile in agriculture, the proportion was the lowest, at only 8%.

Overall assessment

Why this response received Band 7.0

The response presents a clear and well-structured report that logically groups country trends against global patterns and provides an effective overview. Its main limitation stems from minor data misstatements alongside frequent grammatical slips that occasionally disrupt style. To achieve a higher score, ensure complete numeric accuracy against the visual source and focus on refining complex sentence structure and subject-verb agreements.

Band score breakdown

IELTS Writing Criteria Scores

TA

Task Achievement

7.0
Scoring rule

Key features are well selected and logically compared, supported by an effective overview statement.

Next step

Double-check all reported numbers against the chart, correcting small misreadings such as world domestic water use.

CC

Coherence and Cohesion

7.0
Scoring rule

Information is organized logically into logical paragraphs with clear progression throughout the text.

Next step

Use cohesive devices more naturally to connect comparisons without over-relying on repetitive contrast structures.

LR

Lexical Resource

7.0
Scoring rule

A good variety of vocabulary related to data trends and proportions is used appropriately.

Next step

Eliminate uncorrected phrasing errors such as repeating words when introducing topic nouns.

GRA

Grammatical Range and Accuracy

6.0
Scoring rule

A mix of simple and complex sentences is attempted, though minor structural errors remain noticeable.

Next step

Review verb forms and relative clauses to ensure smooth and accurate complex sentence constructions.