The charts below show local government expenditure in 2010 and 2015.
Sample Response
The pie chart depicts indigenous authority money utilization between 2010 and 2015 on diverse kinds of facilities.
In 2010 maximum expenditure was incurred on the study system which remained on peek in 2015, even though it decreased by 3 percent compared to 2010. At the same time, money spent on welfare was inclined by 4 percent within half a decade. Money expended on Defense and healthcare was decreased by 3 percent and 1 percent, respectively.
Furthermore, Money utilized on Interest on borrowing increased by 5 percent in 2015. At the same time money spent on transportation and Culture and leisure activities was declined by 2 percent and 1 percent respectively. On the other hand, the ratio of money utilized on pensions and others observed remain the same.
Overall the maximum fall was noticed in the ratio of education and Defense. In comparison, the maximum increased ratio was seen on the rate of interest.
IELTS Writing Correction
- 1. Use plural noun Original: chart Suggested revision: charts Why it matters: The task contains two pie charts, so the noun must be plural.
- 2. Correct institution Original: indigenous authority Suggested revision: local government Why it matters: Local government accurately names the authority shown in the charts.
- 3. Use precise term Original: money utilization Suggested revision: expenditure Why it matters: Expenditure is the appropriate term for government spending.
- 4. Specify two years Original: between Suggested revision: in Why it matters: The charts show two individual years rather than a continuous period.
- 5. Name spending categories Original: diverse kinds of facilities Suggested revision: different spending categories Why it matters: The chart labels are categories of expenditure, not facilities.
- 6. Clarify largest share Original: 2010 maximum expenditure Suggested revision: 2010, the largest share of expenditure Why it matters: The sentence needs an article and a clearer noun phrase after the year.
- 7. Use chart label Original: study system Suggested revision: education Why it matters: Education is the category named in the chart.
- 8. Correct word choice Original: on peek Suggested revision: at its peak Why it matters: Peak is the correct spelling and it takes the preposition at.
- 9. Correct welfare change Original: was inclined by 4 percent Suggested revision: increased by 5 percentage points Why it matters: Welfare rises from 8% to 13%, a five-percentage-point increase.
- 10. Natural time phrase Original: within half a decade Suggested revision: over the five-year period Why it matters: This phrase describes the comparison period more directly.
- 11. Use active structure Original: Money expended on Defense and healthcare was decreased Suggested revision: Spending on defence and healthcare decreased Why it matters: Decrease is intransitive here, so the passive form is incorrect.
- 12. Lowercase common noun Original: Money Suggested revision: money Why it matters: Money should not be capitalised after the introductory adverb.
Suggested Rewrites
- chart charts
- indigenous authority local government
- money utilization expenditure
- between in
- diverse kinds of facilities different spending categories
- 2010 maximum expenditure 2010, the largest share of expenditure
Why this response received Band 5.5
The response covers all expenditure categories and identifies several important changes, with a recognisable overview and generally clear paragraphing. Its main weakness is inaccurate and imprecise reporting, particularly the welfare increase and the incomplete account of the joint largest rise. The highest-priority improvement is to verify every change against both charts and express comparisons with conventional statistical language.
IELTS Writing Criteria Scores
Task Achievement
Most categories and changes are reported, but welfare rose by five rather than four percentage points and shared the largest increase with borrowing interest.
Check each value carefully and make the overview accurately identify both the joint largest increases and decreases.
Coherence and Cohesion
The response follows a broadly logical introduction-detail-overview structure, although linking is mechanical and the overview would be more effective earlier.
Place a concise overview after the introduction and group categories by increases, decreases, and unchanged shares.
Lexical Resource
There is enough vocabulary to describe the data, but frequent unsuitable choices such as indigenous authority, study system, and inclined reduce precision.
Use standard chart language, including local government, education, rose, fell, and percentage points.
Grammatical Range and Accuracy
Meaning is generally recoverable, but frequent errors in passive forms, agreement, articles, and capitalisation limit grammatical control.
Use accurate active comparison structures such as spending on welfare rose from 8% to 13%.
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IELTS Academic Writing Task 1
The charts below show local government expenditure in 2010 and 2015.
Your response
Write the task yourself, then compare your choices with the annotated response.