The chart below show the number of magazines sold per person in five countries in 2000 and 2010, with projected sales for 2020.
Sample Response
The bar chart compares five different countries in terms of the number of magazines sold per individual in two years 2000 and 2010, with projections for 2020.
It is clear that while the number of magazines sold in country D increases, the opposite is true for the other countries. Additionally, the figure for country B is largest,
as opposed to the lowest figure which can be seen in country E.
In 2000, a resident in country B sold nearly 50 magazines, while just under 50 units and 40 units were sold by an individual in country A and C respectively. In contrast, there were nearly 20 magazines sold by country D, compared to only approximately 6 by country E. In 2010, the quantities of magazines sold in country A, B and C fell slightly, whereas the other countries saw the opposite trends in their figures.
In 2020, it is predicted that the number of magazines sold in country B, country C and country E decrease minimally by around 1 each, while that of country D rises by similar number. Meanwhile, there was a considerable fall to under 40 in the figure for country A.
IELTS Writing Correction
- 1. Simplify year phrase Original: in two years 2000 and 2010 Suggested revision: in 2000 and 2010 Why it matters: The years can follow the preposition directly without the redundant noun phrase.
- 2. Mark projected trend Original: country D increases Suggested revision: country D is projected to increase Why it matters: The overall rise includes the forecast for 2020, so the projection should be explicit.
- 3. Add superlative article Original: is largest Suggested revision: is the highest Why it matters: A superlative in this noun phrase requires the definite article.
- 4. Correct the agent Original: a resident in country B sold nearly 50 magazines Suggested revision: nearly 50 magazines were sold per person in country B Why it matters: The chart reports sales per person rather than magazines sold by each resident.
- 5. Express per-person figures Original: by an individual in country A and C respectively Suggested revision: per person in countries A and C, respectively Why it matters: This wording accurately expresses the chart's per-person measure for two countries.
- 6. Correct sales measure Original: sold by country D Suggested revision: sold per person in country D Why it matters: A country is not the seller; the bar represents magazines sold per person.
- 7. Name the rising countries Original: the other countries saw the opposite trends in their figures Suggested revision: figures for countries D and E rose slightly Why it matters: The chart specifically shows small increases for D and E between 2000 and 2010.
- 8. Use future projection Original: there was a considerable fall Suggested revision: there is projected to be a considerable fall Why it matters: The 2020 value is a forecast, so past tense is inappropriate.
- 9. Remove redundancy Original: five different countries Suggested revision: five countries Why it matters: Different is unnecessary because the five named countries are already distinct.
- 10. Match chart wording Original: individual Suggested revision: person Why it matters: Per person is the chart's measure and keeps terminology consistent.
- 11. Refine overall trends Original: the opposite is true for the other countries Suggested revision: countries A, B and C decline overall, while E fluctuates Why it matters: Country E rises and then falls, so it does not follow a simple trend opposite to D.
- 12. Correct country C value Original: just under 50 units and 40 units Suggested revision: just under 50 magazines and about 37 magazines Why it matters: The 2000 bar for country C is approximately 37 rather than 40.
Suggested Rewrites
- in two years 2000 and 2010 in 2000 and 2010
- country D increases country D is projected to increase
- is largest is the highest
- a resident in country B sold nearly 50 magazines nearly 50 magazines were sold per person in country B
- by an individual in country A and C respectively per person in countries A and C, respectively
- sold by country D sold per person in country D
Why this response received Band 6.5
The response is well organised by time period, identifies the highest and lowest countries, and reports most values and movements accurately. The main limitation is an overgeneralised overview claiming that every country except D declines, although E first rises and then returns to roughly its initial level. The priority is to make the overview fully precise and maintain accurate grammar and future-reference language in the projection paragraph.
IELTS Writing Criteria Scores
Task Achievement
The response selects the main rankings and describes almost all changes accurately, but the overview misrepresents country E as following a general decline.
Qualify the overview by noting that A, B, and C fall, D rises, and E fluctuates before returning to about five.
Coherence and Cohesion
Information follows a clear introduction-overview-detail sequence and is grouped logically by year, though the isolated line break within the overview disrupts paragraph unity.
Keep each overview sentence in one coherent paragraph and use consistent grouping when comparing the five countries.
Lexical Resource
The vocabulary is varied enough to describe values, projections, and contrasting trends, despite several imprecise collocations and repeated country labels.
Prefer precise expressions such as 'magazine sales per person,' 'was projected to fall,' and 'rose by a similar amount.'
Grammatical Range and Accuracy
The response uses a range of complex structures with generally clear meaning, but agreement, article, and tense errors recur in the final paragraph.
Maintain projection language consistently and check agreement in phrases such as 'the number decreases' and articles in 'by a similar amount.'
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IELTS Academic Writing Task 1
The chart below show the number of magazines sold per person in five countries in 2000 and 2010, with projected sales for 2020.
Your response
Write the task yourself, then compare your choices with the annotated response.