The number of tourists visiting Malaysia and Dubai from 1995 to 2003 is presented below. Tourist Visit in Malaysia and Dubai (in ‘000)

Same questionCompare 2 different answers (Band 6–6.5)

Sample Response

1

The line graph compares the number of travellers who visited Malaysia and Dubai from 1995 to 2003. Overall, more tourists visited Malaysiawent to visit Malaysia from 1995 to 2000, but after 2001, Dubai received more visitorsafterwards, Dubai got more visitors. Turning to the detailsGetting back to the details, 100 thousand tourists visited Malaysia in 1995 and it was more than doublemore than double than the number of tourists in Dubai in the same yearat the same time. Next year, visitors to Malaysia increasedincreases while the figure for Dubai declinedwhile declined in Dubai. Afterwards, the number of tourists in Malaysia and Dubai rapidly increased , and in 1998and in 1998, 200 thousand people went to Malaysia compared to about 175 thousandover 150 thousand in Dubai. Interestingly, the number of holidaymakersholidaymakers’ number visiting both destinationsto both these places were closebecame identical and reachedreached to over a quarter million in 2000. Next year, both countries recorded increases in visitor numberswitnessed a hike in their tourists’ number which stood at around 325 thousand. A reverse trend during the next few years followed with more tourists in Dubai than in Malaysia. In 2002 Dubai got more trippers and this trend continued in the next year when 0.4 million vacationers visited Dubai compared to less than 0.25 million in Malaysia.

Overall assessment

Why this response received Band 6.0

The response identifies the overall shift from Malaysia leading early to Dubai finishing well ahead, and it supports this with several useful figures. Its main weakness is uneven accuracy, especially the claim that the totals were identical in 2000, while language errors and a single-block structure reduce precision and flow. Prioritise exact comparisons from the graph, then group the overview and chronological details into clear paragraphs.

Band score breakdown

IELTS Writing Criteria Scores

TA

Task Achievement

6.5
Scoring rule

A relevant overview and several key figures describe the broad trends, but the 2000 equality and post-2000 comparison are imprecise and some fluctuations are omitted.

Next step

Check each comparison against the graph and state that the figures were close in 2000, equal in 2001, and diverged thereafter.

CC

Coherence and Cohesion

6.0
Scoring rule

The report follows the timeline clearly, although all information is presented in one block and some transitions are mechanical or awkward.

Next step

Separate the introduction, overview, and chronological detail into distinct paragraphs with fewer formulaic linking phrases.

LR

Lexical Resource

6.0
Scoring rule

There is a useful range of trend and visitor vocabulary, but collocations such as ‘holidaymakers’ number’ and ‘got more trippers’ are unnatural.

Next step

Use precise forms such as ‘the number of tourists rose’ and avoid varying common nouns with less suitable synonyms.

GRA

Grammatical Range and Accuracy

6.0
Scoring rule

A mix of simple and complex structures communicates the main message, but agreement, comparison, tense, and preposition errors recur.

Next step

Review subject-verb agreement and comparative structures, especially ‘more than double’ and consistent past-tense reporting.

Put the feedback to work

Write this task while it is fresh

Try the same task now. It helps you remember the feedback and write better next time.

IELTS Academic Writing Task 1

The number of tourists visiting Malaysia and Dubai from 1995 to 2003 is presented below. Tourist Visit in Malaysia and Dubai (in ‘000)

Your response

Words0
20:00

Write the task yourself, then compare your choices with the annotated response.