The plans below show the layout of an office in 2020 and now, after renovation.
This response is estimated at Band 5.5. Can you write a better one?
Write yours and get clear feedback on all four criteria.
- Closest to official scores
- What to fix on each criterion
- Feedback in about 20 seconds · free
Sample Response
The two floor planspictures compare the previous and present layout of an office in the year 2020 and after renovation.
Overall, the only one private desk was cancelled and gathered with other three desks and chairs surroundings except the desk and chair at the corner on the southeast integrate face-to-face work place. New social spaces and devices were provided in this office.
On the left area of the officeofficial room, two groups of desks and chairs were moved and the initial filing cabinet area becamebecome a new public space, which is provided to personnelpersonnels with a coffee tablewith coffee table, an armchair, and a sofaarmchair and sofa. A new coffee machine is placed inset on the southwest corner of this room.
On the right side of the office,At the right half space in this office, the moved and cancelled desks and chairs at the beginning have been convertedare designed to be an open working area. Four desks are combinedconbined intoto a face-to-face work place. In addition,Finally, the original private desk area is replaced bycancelled for a water coolerwater cooler machine.
Why this response received Band 5.5
The response successfully identifies the main structural and layout changes between 2020 and the present, presenting a clear overview of the office renovation. However, grammatical inaccuracies and awkward phrasing frequently obscure meaning and make descriptions difficult to follow. Focus on improving sentence structure and precise positional vocabulary to enhance clarity and flow.
IELTS Writing Criteria Scores
Task Achievement
The main changes are highlighted with an overarching summary, though some specific feature locations are described confusingly.
Use clearer compass directions and spatial references to describe feature repositioning accurately.
Coherence and Cohesion
The essay follows a logical paragraph structure, but cohesive phrasing is occasionally awkward or repetitive.
Use smoother transitional phrases to link descriptions of removed and newly added features.
Lexical Resource
An adequate vocabulary is used to describe changes, but word choice errors and spelling slips are noticeable.
Review precise word forms and spelling for key vocabulary such as combined and personnel.
Grammatical Range and Accuracy
Complex sentence attempts often result in grammatical errors that disrupt the natural flow of the description.
Practice constructing simpler passive clauses to describe physical changes clearly and correctly.