The diagram gives information about the process of making pulp and paper.
Sample Response
The given diagram depicts the process for making a slurry, thereafter steps involved in the production of paper and the formation of bales and rolls of paper for printing. To make pulp, certain trees are cut from the forest for a requirement of logs. Then, it is further crushed in the chipping wheel and moves to a large container which has to be at the bottom. In this container, crushed wood is added with some purchased chips and mixed properly. The unwanted substances are removed from the nobe and the formed slurry is passed through the washer for the formation of a pulp screen. From the pulp screen, the clean pulp is transported to a number of manufacturing units for the formation of products such as bales and boxes.
For the formation of bales, the clean pulp from the industry is poured into a machine to form a pulp of the required consistency. The liquid pulp is passed through a dryer which consists of belts. The wet pulp is in the form of a thin sheet passed through the dryer to be moistureless. The reels of pulp are made and are cut into the required dimensions with the use of a pulp cutter for the production of the final product, that is paper bales.
For the formation of paper rolls, firstly clean pulp is passed through a pulp cleanser if it consists of any impurities. Secondly, the cleaned pulp is dried under the dryer and passed through the pulp presser. This presser consists of four wheels, among which three are arranged in an inverted triangle and one is between the opposite side of two wheels. As the dried pulp passes through the presser it presses through the pressure of wheels and takes formation like a thin paper. This paper is further passed between two pairs of wheels such that if paper passes it pressurizes for the thickness of the paper. These sheets are dried so that moisture should not be left and converted into rolling sheets. These produced products from producers are sold to a customer through shopkeepers.
IELTS Writing Correction
- 1. Link stages clearly Original: thereafter steps involved Suggested revision: and the subsequent steps involved Why it matters: The original phrase does not connect grammatically to the preceding clause.
- 2. Use purpose phrase Original: for a requirement of logs Suggested revision: to produce logs Why it matters: This wording expresses the purpose of cutting the trees more naturally.
- 3. Correct passive structure Original: crushed wood is added with Suggested revision: the wood chips are combined with Why it matters: Combine with is the correct passive construction for the two chip sources.
- 4. Name the digester Original: mixed properly Suggested revision: processed in the digester Why it matters: The diagram specifically shows both chip sources entering a digester.
- 5. Identify two lines Original: manufacturing units Suggested revision: production lines Why it matters: The clean pulp divides into two distinct production lines in the diagram.
- 6. Correct final products Original: boxes Suggested revision: rolls Why it matters: The diagram ends with paper bales and paper rolls, while boxes are only the intended use of rough paper.
- 7. Name pulp former Original: poured into a machine Suggested revision: fed into a pulp former Why it matters: The first machine on the rough-paper line is explicitly labelled pulp former.
- 8. Describe sheet formation Original: form a pulp of the required consistency Suggested revision: form a sheet of pulp Why it matters: The pulp former creates material that proceeds as a sheet toward the dryers.
- 9. Use diagram label Original: dryer which consists of belts Suggested revision: series of pulp dryers Why it matters: The visual labels this stage as pulp dryers and does not state that they consist of belts.
- 10. Use natural phrasing Original: to be moistureless Suggested revision: to remove its moisture Why it matters: Remove its moisture is the natural way to describe the purpose of drying.
- 11. Match machine label Original: a pulp cleanser Suggested revision: pulp cleaners Why it matters: The refined-paper branch shows a stage labelled pulp cleaners.
- 12. Express purpose directly Original: if it consists of any impurities Suggested revision: to remove impurities Why it matters: The cleaner has a stated purpose, so a conditional clause is illogical here.
Suggested Rewrites
- thereafter steps involved and the subsequent steps involved
- for a requirement of logs to produce logs
- crushed wood is added with the wood chips are combined with
- mixed properly processed in the digester
- manufacturing units production lines
- boxes rolls
Why this response received Band 6.0
The response’s strongest feature is its generally logical movement from pulp preparation to the two production branches, with most major stages mentioned. Its main limitation is uneven accuracy: it confuses some products and equipment, adds an unsupported sales stage, and lacks a clear overview of the shared process and its two outcomes; prioritise a concise overview and exact visual labels before describing details.
IELTS Writing Criteria Scores
Task Achievement
Most major stages in pulp, bale, and paper-roll production are covered, but some equipment and outcomes are misidentified and the final sales claim is unsupported.
State that clean pulp splits into rough paper bales and refined paper rolls, then reproduce each labelled stage accurately without adding post-production activity.
Coherence and Cohesion
The three paragraphs follow the process branches in a broadly logical order, although some sequencing within sentences is cumbersome and repetitive.
Use one overview followed by clearly separated shared, rough-paper, and refined-paper stages with concise sequencing language.
Lexical Resource
There is enough process vocabulary to describe the diagram, but frequent awkward collocations such as “takes formation” and repeated use of “formation” reduce precision.
Use exact labels and natural process verbs such as enters, passes through, is pressed, is dried, and is wound.
Grammatical Range and Accuracy
A mix of simple and complex structures conveys the main meaning, but recurring article, agreement, reference, and clause-construction errors weaken control.
Build shorter passive process sentences and check each subject, pronoun reference, article, and verb form for grammatical agreement.
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IELTS Academic Writing Task 1
The diagram gives information about the process of making pulp and paper.
Your response
Write the task yourself, then compare your choices with the annotated response.