The chart shows the proportion of renewable energy in total energy supply in 4 countries from 1997 to 2010.
Sample Response
The given bar chart presents data about the percentages of renewable energy with regards to the total energy production in four different countries (Australia, Sweden, Iceland and Turkey) in three years; 1997, 2000 and 2010.
Overall, Sweden and Iceland witnessed an upward trend in the use of renewable energy sources in the three examined years. It can also be seen that among the four countries, this type of energy was most popular in Iceland.
In 1997, almost half of the total energy produced in Iceland came from renewable resources. This figure continued to climb steadily to 60% in 2000 and more than 70% in 2010. Meanwhile, in 1997, only approximately 5% of the entire amount of energy produced was generated from natural resources in Sweden, who experienced a similar trend to that of Iceland in regards to proportion of renewable energy produced.
Regarding Australia, nearly 10% of the energy supply was from renewable resources in 1997, and this figure decreased slightly to around 5% in 2010. Similarly, the percentage of renewable energy used in Turkey experienced a decline over the years from approximately 37% in 1997 down to just under 35% in 2010.
IELTS Writing Correction
- 1. Match chart measure Original: production Suggested revision: supply Why it matters: The chart measures renewable energy as a share of total energy supply, not production.
- 2. Correct fixed phrase Original: regards Suggested revision: regard Why it matters: With regard to is the standard fixed expression in formal English.
- 3. Introduce year list Original: three years; 1997, 2000 and 2010 Suggested revision: three years: 1997, 2000 and 2010 Why it matters: A colon, rather than a semicolon, introduces the list of years.
- 4. Describe statistical share Original: most popular in Iceland Suggested revision: accounted for the largest share in Iceland Why it matters: Largest share describes the measured proportion more precisely than most popular.
- 5. Correct final value Original: more than 70% Suggested revision: about 70% Why it matters: The 2010 bar for Iceland is approximately 70%, not clearly above it.
- 6. Use chart category Original: natural Suggested revision: renewable Why it matters: Natural resources is broader than the renewable-energy category shown in the chart.
- 7. Correct phrase and article Original: in regards to proportion Suggested revision: with regard to the proportion Why it matters: The fixed phrase is with regard to, and the specific proportion requires the article the.
- 8. Use singular measure Original: percentages Suggested revision: proportion Why it matters: Proportion matches the chart's single measured concept more precisely.
- 9. Remove redundancy Original: four different countries Suggested revision: four countries Why it matters: Different is unnecessary because the four countries are already named separately.
- 10. Repeat precise term Original: this type of energy Suggested revision: renewable energy Why it matters: Naming renewable energy directly is clearer than using a vague reference.
- 11. Use concise trend verb Original: continued to climb steadily Suggested revision: rose steadily Why it matters: The shorter phrase conveys the same upward movement more directly.
- 12. Give precise estimate Original: almost half Suggested revision: approximately 46% Why it matters: The 1997 Iceland bar is close to 46%, so a numerical estimate is more informative.
Suggested Rewrites
- production supply
- regards regard
- three years; 1997, 2000 and 2010 three years: 1997, 2000 and 2010
- most popular in Iceland accounted for the largest share in Iceland
- more than 70% about 70%
- natural renewable
Why this response received Band 7.0
The response is strongest in its clear organisation, effective overview, and accurate identification of Iceland as the leading country while Sweden and Iceland rise. The main limitation is incomplete selection of intermediate values and an oversimplified account of Turkey, which rises in 2000 before falling. Add the missing comparisons and use consistently precise terms for renewable energy shares.
IELTS Writing Criteria Scores
Task Achievement
The overview identifies the dominant country and two upward trends, and most figures are accurate, but several 2000 values are omitted and Turkey’s temporary rise is missed.
Include the key intermediate comparisons, especially Turkey’s increase from 1997 to 2000 before its decline, and quantify Sweden’s growth more fully.
Coherence and Cohesion
Information is logically divided into an overview and two well-focused detail paragraphs, with clear progression and generally effective referencing.
Strengthen comparison across countries by explicitly linking similar and contrasting patterns within each detail paragraph.
Lexical Resource
The response uses a good range of appropriate academic and trend vocabulary, though popular, natural resources, and some repeated phrasing are not fully precise.
Use the exact term renewable energy throughout and choose comparison language that describes proportions rather than popularity.
Grammatical Range and Accuracy
A varied range of complex sentences is generally accurate and easy to follow, with only occasional punctuation, article, and relative-pronoun errors.
Refine accuracy by using which for countries in non-defining clauses and checking punctuation around lists and introductory phrases.
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IELTS Academic Writing Task 1
The chart shows the proportion of renewable energy in total energy supply in 4 countries from 1997 to 2010.
Your response
Write the task yourself, then compare your choices with the annotated response.