The plans below show a theatre in 2010 and 2012.
Sample Response
The yielded two diagrams compares theatre blueprint in 2010 and 2012. Overall, the theatre area was expanded and modernised after 2 years, ticket office and stages were relocated while some are developed and some demolished.
In 2010, the theatre had divided into two parts, and one right side had one in ten proportion while rest of on the right side, left side’s north-east part used for storage. On the south side, the centre of the ticket and cafe was the main door, and the ticket office’s north direction had an admin office. Additionally, the auditorium was ahead of the area and followed by the stage and dressing room.
After two years, one new one in the tenth percentage area was added on the left side. The main door was the same as before, although before the entrance has few spaces. Storage relocated to south-west corner while ticket office moved main door’s left to right and restaurants developed on that place. Storage was now admin office which shifted, dressing room area decreased and it’s on the north-west side. Centre of admin office and dressing room had now created coordination; however, stage and auditorium position was same as in 2910. The shower was built next to the dressing room.
IELTS Writing Correction
- 1. Remove faulty modifier Original: The yielded two diagrams Suggested revision: The two diagrams Why it matters: “Yielded” cannot modify the diagrams in this context.
- 2. Match plural subject Original: compares Suggested revision: compare Why it matters: The plural subject “diagrams” requires the base verb “compare.”
- 3. Use natural noun phrase Original: theatre blueprint Suggested revision: the theatre's layout Why it matters: “The theatre's layout” is the natural phrase for the arrangement shown in the plans.
- 4. Describe the period Original: after 2 years Suggested revision: over the two-year period Why it matters: This phrasing describes the comparison period more precisely.
- 5. Correct unchanged stage Original: ticket office and stages were relocated Suggested revision: ticket office was relocated Why it matters: The plans show that the ticket office moved, while the stage stayed in the same position.
- 6. Keep past tense Original: some are developed and some demolished Suggested revision: some facilities were added and others removed Why it matters: The completed changes require consistent past passive forms and explicit nouns.
- 7. Clarify spatial relation Original: the centre of the ticket and cafe was the main door Suggested revision: the main door was between the ticket office and café Why it matters: The revision clearly states the entrance's position in the 2010 plan.
- 8. Use location phrase Original: ticket office’s north direction Suggested revision: area north of the ticket office Why it matters: The original phrase is not an idiomatic way to describe relative position.
- 9. State central position Original: ahead of the area Suggested revision: in the central area Why it matters: The auditorium occupies the central part of the theatre rather than being “ahead” of an unspecified area.
- 10. Remove invented proportion Original: one new one in the tenth percentage area Suggested revision: an extension Why it matters: The plan shows an extension but provides no one-tenth measurement.
- 11. Use passive form Original: Storage relocated Suggested revision: Storage was relocated Why it matters: The facility receives the action, so the passive auxiliary is required.
- 12. Add definite article Original: to south-west corner Suggested revision: to the south-west corner Why it matters: A specific corner of the theatre requires “the.”
Suggested Rewrites
- The yielded two diagrams The two diagrams
- compares compare
- theatre blueprint the theatre's layout
- after 2 years over the two-year period
- ticket office and stages were relocated ticket office was relocated
- some are developed and some demolished some facilities were added and others removed
Why this response received Band 5.0
The response identifies many of the principal alterations and uses a sensible before-and-after structure, with the unchanged auditorium and stage also noted. However, several descriptions are inaccurate or very difficult to interpret, including the claim that the stage was relocated and the unclear references to added proportions. Prioritise precise spatial language and verify every stated change against the plans.
IELTS Writing Criteria Scores
Task Achievement
The response covers numerous changes and gives an overview, but some key statements are inaccurate or too unclear to demonstrate reliable comparison of the plans.
Describe each major relocation or addition with exact compass positions and remove unsupported claims such as the stage being relocated.
Coherence and Cohesion
The organisation into an overview and separate time periods is appropriate, although unclear referencing and overloaded sentences weaken progression within the paragraphs.
Group the changes by area of the theatre and use shorter sentences with explicit subjects for each relocated or newly added facility.
Lexical Resource
There is some relevant map vocabulary, including relocated, expanded, auditorium, and dressing room, but frequent awkward word choices obscure several descriptions.
Use precise location phrases such as in the south-west corner, to the right of the entrance, and remained unchanged.
Grammatical Range and Accuracy
Complex structures are attempted, but frequent errors in agreement, articles, tense, possession, and clause construction often make meaning difficult to recover.
Build accurate simple sentences first, then combine them while checking subject-verb agreement, articles, and consistent past-tense forms.
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IELTS Academic Writing Task 1
The plans below show a theatre in 2010 and 2012.
Your response
Write the task yourself, then compare your choices with the annotated response.