The bar chart below shows the number of tourists in three nations who traveled to New Zealand in 1999 and 2009. The graph below shows the number of tourists who spent theirholiday in two different ways.

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Sample Response

1

These two charts illustrate the number of tourists from three nations who visited New Zealandvisited to NZ and how they spent their holidaysspent time with their holiday in different ways.

2

Overall,it is clear that the number of tourists from the UKwho from UK and USA showed a sharp rise over the following 10 yearsin following the 10 years,and staying at resorts is the more popular way to spend holidaysmore popular spending time way for tourists in the same period.

3

In 1999,1 million touriststourist from UK travelled to New zealand,and this figure rose significantly to 1.6 million in 2009.Similarly,the USA had about 0.8 million tourists went to New zealand,and then this figure nearlywas doubled in this decade.By contrast,the figure for tourists from Japantourists who from Japan experienced a slight decreaseexperienced decrease slightly,it declined by 20%20% percent.

4

Looking at the line graph,the number of tourists who chose to staychose staying at resorts increased gradually from 1.6 million to 2.4 million betweenduring 1999 and 2004,and then dropped to a low of 1 million. While the figure for backpacking tourists showedshow an opposite trenda trend which is respectively,it rose five fold from 0.2 million to 1 million.

Overall assessment

Why this response received Band 6.0

文章能够准确梳理柱状图与折线图的核心趋势,并对主要数据进行了合理的对比与归纳。然而,句式表达中存在较多基础语法错误(如定语从句缺失谓语动词、介词误用等),且个别词汇使用不够准确。建议下一步重点提升常见句型的准确度,并积累恰当的数据描述与对比词汇。

Band score breakdown

IELTS Writing Criteria Scores

TA

任务完成度

6.0
Scoring rule

文章包含了清晰的总结段落,准确涵盖了两个图表的主要趋势和关键数据。

Next step

在描述数值变化时,可进一步精确化具体数据,并增加不同图表数据之间的相关对比。

CC

连贯与衔接

6.0
Scoring rule

文章分段清晰合理,逻辑连接词的使用使段落衔接整体较为顺畅。

Next step

注意避免个别衔接词(如 respectively)的不当误用,增强句子间的逻辑连贯性。

LR

词汇资源

6.0
Scoring rule

文章尝试使用了丰富的动态描述词汇,但部分搭配和词性选择不够地道。

Next step

积累并熟练掌握表达趋势与对比的高频地道词组,避免出现如 spending time way 等硬译表达。

GRA

语法多样性与准确性

5.0
Scoring rule

文章尝试使用复合句,但语法错误较为频繁,如定语从句缺失动词及介词多余等问题较为突出。

Next step

加强对关系代词与关系副词引导的定语从句及动词搭配的语法特训,确保基础句式表达准确无误。