The graph shows children by age group as a percentage of the young population in the United Kingdom between 1990 and 2001.
Sample Response
The line graph illustrates how the young population in the UK varied during the 1990s comparing their ratio throughout a decade. Overall the trend shows that the ratio of toddlers among the young generation witnessed a decline, while the 10-14 years youngsters’ percentage had seen an increase over time.
The detailed analysis shows that the ratio of infants (babies between 0-4 years old) declined in the UK over time. Their ratio among the youth in the UK was just below 26% in 1990 which dropped to somewhat 23.5% after a decade. In contrast, children between 10 to 14 years witnessed a positive growth rate in terms of their percentage change for the same time period and went above 26% in 2001.
The other striking feature is the drastic slump in the population of British teenagers (15 to 19 years old) for the period from 1990 to 1994 when it touched a low ceiling of almost 23% from a healthy 26%. However, it grew again thereafter and returned to 25% per cent.
IELTS Writing Correction
- 1. State the measured change Original: young population in the UK varied Suggested revision: age-group shares of the UK's young population varied Why it matters: The graph tracks percentage shares by age group rather than the size of the whole young population.
- 2. Use the full period Original: during the 1990s Suggested revision: between 1990 and 2001 Why it matters: The visual extends through 2001, beyond the 1990s.
- 3. Remove the unclear reference Original: their ratio throughout a decade Suggested revision: over the period Why it matters: “Their” has no clear plural antecedent, and the data span more than ten years.
- 4. Use the age group Original: the ratio of toddlers Suggested revision: the share of children aged 0–4 Why it matters: The 0–4 category includes more than toddlers and should be named accurately.
- 5. Use a direct trend verb Original: young generation witnessed a decline Suggested revision: young population declined Why it matters: A percentage declines; the population does not “witness” its own change.
- 6. Fix the age expression Original: 10-14 years youngsters’ percentage Suggested revision: percentage of 10–14-year-olds Why it matters: This form correctly expresses the age range as a plural noun phrase.
- 7. Use simple past Original: had seen an increase Suggested revision: increased Why it matters: The simple past is appropriate for the completed period and avoids an unnecessary perfect form.
- 8. Name the group precisely Original: infants (babies between 0-4 years old) Suggested revision: children aged 0–4 Why it matters: The chart's category covers all children aged zero to four, not only infants.
- 9. Use precise chart language Original: Their ratio among the youth Suggested revision: Their share of the young population Why it matters: “Share” accurately describes the percentage represented by this group.
- 10. Join the clauses correctly Original: which Suggested revision: and Why it matters: The relative clause incorrectly suggests that 1990 itself dropped.
- 11. Use an approximation adverb Original: somewhat Suggested revision: approximately Why it matters: “Somewhat” cannot directly modify a numerical value in this way.
- 12. Give the exact year Original: after a decade Suggested revision: in 2001 Why it matters: The endpoint is eleven years after 1990 and is explicitly labelled 2001.
Suggested Rewrites
- young population in the UK varied age-group shares of the UK's young population varied
- during the 1990s between 1990 and 2001
- their ratio throughout a decade over the period
- the ratio of toddlers the share of children aged 0–4
- young generation witnessed a decline young population declined
- 10-14 years youngsters’ percentage percentage of 10–14-year-olds
Why this response received Band 6.5
The response is clearly organised and uses a reasonably varied range of language to describe three age groups, with an overview that captures two major long-term movements. Its main limitation is incomplete coverage: the 5–9 group is omitted and the early rise in the 0–4 group is overlooked; the priority is to compare all four series and include their most important turning points.
IELTS Writing Criteria Scores
Task Achievement
The overview correctly identifies the decline in 0–4s and rise in 10–14s, but one entire series is omitted and some variation is oversimplified.
Add the 5–9 trend and note that 0–4s first peaked around 1992 before falling, while 15–19s recovered after 1994.
Coherence and Cohesion
The response has clear paragraphing and logical progression from the overview to selected age-group trends.
Use a consistent comparison structure across body paragraphs so related age groups are paired and contrasts are easier to scan.
Lexical Resource
Vocabulary is varied enough to describe movement, but several choices are exaggerated, redundant, or unnatural, such as ‘low ceiling’ and ‘25% per cent’.
Prefer precise neutral terms such as ‘fell to a low’, ‘recovered’, and ‘percentage’, avoiding inflated trend wording.
Grammatical Range and Accuracy
A mix of simple and complex sentences communicates the trends clearly, though modifier, tense, and age-range constructions contain recurring slips.
Use forms such as ‘children aged 10–14’ and keep past tense consistent throughout the historical description.
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IELTS Academic Writing Task 1
The graph shows children by age group as a percentage of the young population in the United Kingdom between 1990 and 2001.
Your response
Write the task yourself, then compare your choices with the annotated response.